Show CRUEL CRUELTY TY ATTRIBUTED BY MOTHER TO YOUTH f UNDER PARENT ARENT GUIDE c t Forces of School and Society Exert Great Influence i 0 Outside d e 0 of f Home on Y Young oung P People eop 1 c r Sisters Sister's Disloyalty J II J t By BETTY BLAIR No parent needs to feel a futile guilt because he c cant can't nt make inake take his boy follow the profession he selected for him Im or leave him hima a fortune Neither sho should t they ey expect young people people peo peo- pie seething with life lite and their own hopes to ete eternally nally walk on eggs to spare parental nerv nerves Dear Miss Blair I notice that young people have havea a I tendency to bring their problems problems probe lems to you OU concerning children children- parent relations so oro o I presume a mother has a aright right to to todo do the same came thing reg regarding re re- re- re g garding a r din g h her r point of view tow to- to w war ward a r d parent parent- 1 children relations relations rela rela- and h her r rown own In lar I am the mother of four growing children I sometimes sometimes some some- times think In their self tion tron they are arc unnecessarily necessarily cruel t to me me They disregard my point of view so oft often n so little littleto to fit into the pattern their father o a and d I have laid out for Cor them to follow and on which we have pent a a considerable amo amount t of mone money We are not wealthy and have to scheme for forthe the money we put on their education Yet Yet- for example along musical lines this money h has s been en almost t totally wasted The children themselves have haye thought they wanted to know music and we have been eager cager to have them do so yet et we have pant man many dollars V to toward rd this end eid in instruments and lessons and ind they haven't put their heart and md nd soul Into it U enough to get anything but very m. m mediocre res re- re s suits With all our urging they would practice when they fe felt t like it and oftener no-oftener and music d doesn't grow by such methods S We have tho thought they should be more t their wo at school o yet they have been en only av average av rage students and sometimes not ev even n that Then it isn't only them that dont don't seem seem cIn to to come it is th the fact that with all aU allour allour our love and giving el they seem to appreciate it so little and arc are so w woften often unnecessarily thoughtless and unkind in their remarks and the Uie things t they ey demand Are Arc we different from most parents in inthe the results results results' they get from rom par parenthood or is our kind the common lot Discouraged Olive Roberts Roberl Barton who vho has hOlS' made 3 a lifelong study of human relationships re re- re ps between p parents rents and children chil chil- dren ciren takes the attitude In connection with the very problem concerning I which you ask that if there are fail tail I urea the parents are as much to bl blame me as the thc children and that the success ess of the relationships between the two depends almost wholly on the parents This Tab philosophy of ot acceptance of things as they are she believes to be the o 0 of calm content and rich harmony in 11 families as they grow growl older In accordance with which she lays down th the following rules First we cannot fit any child into 1 a groove Second w wa cannot exp expect ct our opinions to be theirs thir when we send them out in the world to be educated ted ant ann l learn arn other peoples people's ples opinions T rd we must not confuse inde inde- P 1 nce with cruelty or n F Fourth we must not eat our hearts out ciu b because we have e been unable to give them what we so often miscall C Concerning the pattern of which you ou mention Discouraged one might a as well plant pant a s seed ed and then l. l each cach of ot its r resulting branches W which lh direction to grow as to expect the child to conform in every respect after ner f u he is old enough to gen efa crate erate e independent thought ac and ac- ac won Your children love you If It they are cruel cr el they arc are thou thoughtlessly so EO What What-is h t-Is t to you dOls doesn't doest t have t Hi the same lEme name to them The trouble h here ie re is 15 still Uk like ik the ruthless force of the growing ro ing plant It will grow and even split through a hard rock to do so 0 but you OU cannot prevents Its ex cx- These se young pe people wi will l surprise yo Give them 10 or 20 years Vears years and y find succeeded dand and developed beyond your o r but it will b be a new J P tern m formed the e desIgn e of their own indi Vi K P id i'd Ruth book The rho TheU Polk it It- you U w want nt confirmation of the foregoing oreg ing statements v-i v THANKS FOR GREETINGS 1 bt want to thank m my loyz Joyal friends friend of Hearts Heart's Haven for the b message sent I l whir l. could reply t to you o ml all aU JI T II but I a am sure 00 on 1 t. t c the will for the tho il deed cd a I wt my mv 7 back to you yon 00 that the c cain rin year will bring wit with It tre trea lUres lures ures of of- happiness ha to you OU all an GIRL IRL TROUBLES LES TROUBLE Dear Miss 1 Blair P Perhaps rH pi yo you will wUI say I am just up trouble for but myself 1 I d n. n t s em m J to get gel my mind to togo 2 go in a any ariy y- y other ther direction My sister has be been k with a very nice boy boy for almost a year They are re r t opposed to be going steady but she on n him every nce in a aHe hn 0 He is so good and honest st he doesn't how she h hc is fooling hirn hilJ Ir I makes es m me s so furious u with ith her as Letters Letten questions and re requests requests requests re- re quests for advice should be addressed to MISS 1 BETTY BLAIR HEARTS HEART'S HAVEN TELEGRAM SALT LA LAKE XE KE CITY Write legibly upon only one side Ide of the paper It Is necessary that pend the right name me and address address ad ad- dress but these will be held in strict confidence and will wUl not appear In print Questions Involving In In- advertising Information Information Information tion cannot be answered If Ith the other boys she goes Out dut with arent aren't worth his his' little fing finger r. r I am always raving about him and how fine ine he is and what chumps these other boys arc are and she gets so angry with m me she accuses me of being in love with him myself It t is true I could belt beIt h he weren't so much in love with her He tells me about it all aU the time when we have little tle talks together I know how unfair ir it it is is for or her to treat him this way He is sure to find it th then n he will think the whole family i and I in particular have been in league with her r to deceive deceive de de- de him J I want vant to let him know lenow what she is doing and yet If 11 I do doshe doshe doshe she will vill never forgive m me He doesn't think she is as much inlove in inlove inlove love with him as he he is with her and andI I have said Oh maybe she will wiIl be if il y you will time And then I have added H H isn't in love with anyone right now but herself She's just at that stage stape you know This makes him think very seriously yet he is willing to work and wait for her if it there is a chance she will someday love him Is there anything I l' l can do Big g Sister I think k n not t Big SiS Sister er B Better let these two work out their own problem Your loyalty is first of aUto all aU to your sister even though another of ot whom you are very fond is doubtless doubt less to tobe be hurt hurl Give the problem a chance to come to its own conclusion sion slon or or happy continuation which whichever h hever hever h- h ever it be Your our sister may ny have her er eyes opened by something that will make makei i its appeal to her heart far more than words of yours ours could do Tha old saying aying Nev Never Ner r trouble trouble till i troubles you jou is a fairly aid guide |