| Show WOMAN THINKS GUIDE CHARTS WOULD HELP YOUNG IN MARRIAGE i j Mother 1 Makes St Startling Discovery of Sons Son s Behavior in Letter Wedding Gifts Not Expected If Inv Invitation Invitation t tation for Church Only S I f A By BETTY BLAIR I 1 Love Is only a part of marriage Mental companionships V I form a large part of producing happiness-producing ingredient People whose minds do not work in the same channels are bound boundo to o feel a lack in each other and a feeling that they are mis- mis ma mated d. d I Dear Miss Blair I wish it were a young person 1 writing this letter Jetter because then I think the young oung people would pay attention to it it I I I. I however have arR arf arrived ar ar- ar- ar rived at the very 4 1 f m mature turc age of 32 I ILI A Rill R years I married at atthe II I 1 the very early age I I I 1 of 17 so it seems to toI tome I Pd me I have been r I- I married a life life- life life- MI I time I was so ignorant ig Jg- LAI of all nIl that I i ii marriage m mea means C a n s I I that I almost threw m my happiness away on the thc rocks but happily a n good kind friend took hold of me and my problem and led me to safety I have wished man many times there were guide charts for tor young people to follow so o the they wouldn't make so many mistakes mistake In their young oung married lives If It they could on only I learn leam early in life liCe that love isn't everything in marriage they wouldn't make so many stupid blunders When m my young oung husband was fed up on love Jove and I didn't have intelligence or wit to fill fillIn fillin fillin in the empty gap he sought divergence di die elsewhere Then when he came home I upbraided him with what I thought was his loss loss of love for forme me The more I complained complained com com- and nagged and grumbled grumbled grum grum- bled the cooler grew his tion Seeks Other Interests It wasn't other women he sought ought but boon companions with whom he played cards until until un un- til UI far into the night Finally I decided I could stand it no longer and I went home to my mother who sympathized s with me mc It was at this time the good friend stepped in She told me my husband husband hus hus- band was drinking and that I had better go home to him She told me a lot of other things too bout about what a wife should know and do It opened my eyes ees and andI I went home I selected the best of my husbands husband's friends with wives and invited them to our house I made refreshments for them and and we all played cards lose lo 10 o se gether ether ther My mother thought it was a terrible thing that I should en encourage encourage en en- courage my husband to play playcards playcards playcards cards right in our own home But I thought I was right and kept on We were invited to the homes of the others We set certain certain tam tain standards that all had to live up to This increased our self- self respect I stopped nagging my husband I found small smaIl things to praise him for I did things outside my home in a public way to make my husband proud of me mc I encouraged him to get in inand inand inand and do something too I discovered that love was a abig abig abig big word that meant much more than kisses kisses' and caresses This discovery saved our happiness saved m my husband to be the worthy father lather of my children and a respectable citizen No doubt young people will think this is a very prea preachy hy letter letter let let- ter but when I read the letter I. I from the woman whose husband had gone to to another woman I couldn't help thinking that mabe maybe maybe may may- be the fault faul t was partly hers if it she would justly consider it so OBSERVER If people want to make marriage a permanent affair they must have faith and confidence not not only in inthe the Institution of marriage but in themselves themselves them them- selves and their intelligence and in in- When marriages fail it isn't the institution of marriage that has failed it is the people who are themselves failures And I wouldn't be he too sure about the failure of young people to remember remember remember re re- re- re member the words of those who have hate had experience with ith marr marriage age in regard regard regard re re- re- re gard to its problems Observer For there For there are certain problems that are duplicated in every marriage and andone andone andone one of the most certain is that which I comes with the knowledge that love I isn't everything Thank you for the thel l letter 1 READ REAl SONS SON'S LETTER LEITER Dear Miss Blair When I was cleaning m my sons son's room I ran across a letter from froma a girl to my son that has shocked me so I haven't been able to think clearly as to what I should do since Shall Shan I go to my son with the letter Jetter and tell him I have read it and try to have a talk with him about the things the letter reveals concern concerning In his behavior Or shall I wait and make the attempt to get this confidence confidence con con- in another way I know h hc he will be furious over the fact that I have read his letter letter letter let let- ter and discovered his secret but butI I cant can't benr bear to let the matter go goon goon goon on in this way without talking to him and cautioning him regarding regarding regarding re re- re- re garding the dangers danger he knows vs' S. S nothing about Please help me if it ifS S you can DISTRACTED MOTHER I think your only course is to be absolutely honest with your son Admit Admit Ad Ad- mit the fact that you have read hi his hisS S letter Jetter that you have a feeling o of compunction over admitting the fact yet that you are glad you have done donela to la 0 since it gives you an opportunity to talk to him concerning certain matters one side only o of which you ou fear he may be aware To admit the human side of you to your son fearlessly yet with th the acknowledgment that thal you also have hav broken regulations In reading the let S ter of another without permission may do more to bring you together and place lace you on a plane where yo you I j IU Letters questions n a and n d requests requests re reo quests for advice should be addressed to MISS BETTY BLAIR HEARTS HEART'S HAVEN TELEGRAM SALT L LA LAKE A K Eo B. Write legibly upon only one side of the paper It is necessary that you append append append ap ap- ap- ap pend the right name and address address ad ad- dress but th these e will DC oe held in strict confidence and will not appear in print Questions involving involving in in- advertising information information tion cannot be answered may talk things over than anything else could do But be sure of your our ground and what you want to say before you speak to your our son about the matter You must first also arrive at the point where you ou can be guided by reason and not emotion Wh Why not even take time to do a little litHe reading and to leave the books you read where your our son may see them The books in themselves may come to be behe bethe bethe the he point of contact between you on the subject Books recommended for boys between be bc- tween 14 and 17 are arc Sex in Life by ay D D. D B. B and E. E B. B Armstrong Love Lovein in the Making b by N. N W. W Edson Keeping In Condition by H. H H. H Moore Books for more mature young men to read are The Rational Sex Life for Men by M. M J. J Exner Love and Marriage by T. T W. W Galloway The Dynamic of Manhood by L. L H. H Gulick Sex and Common Sense by A. A M. M Royden and Sex Hygiene by Von Van and The library may have other books not listed here all of which will quite likely be on the reserve shelves The Sex Factor in Character Training b by M. M J. J Exner is a book designed especially for parents of adolescent children ETIQUETTE PROBLEM I IDear Dear Miss Blair If one is Invited to a church wedding but not to the reception afterward is it necessary to send senda a gift Thank you E B 0 O. Invitations to the church wedding which do not also include an tion to the reception do not call for gifts If It however a person really wants to send a gift the fact that he was not nol invited to the reception need not deter him |
