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Show HLPhillipr W HIAWATHA-G.O.P. STYLE ("Wendell fTiUkie durinn his mil tribe ami cArisfenwl 'Hying Eagle. AVhj iemJ Forth upon the GiU'he Gumee, By the shining Big-Sea-Watcr, At the doorway of the wigwam. . With the royalties about him, rten-Del -Wiil-Kie stood and waited. All the air was full of freshness, All the earth was bright and joyous, And before him, through the sun- shine. Westward, eastward, northward, southward Passed the golden swarms, the Ahmo, Passed the bees, the presidential, singing "Nice place Is the White House," Chanting "This time you can make It." Bright before him shone Chl-Caw-Go. Level spread the boom before him; From it leaped the nomination, sparkling, flashing in the sunlight, Looking fair again and tempting Even after what he'd been through. Toward the sun his hands were lifted Both the palms spread out against It, And between the parted fingers Fell the sunshine on his Jeaturet, Something in the mist of morning Loomed and lifted from the water, Now seemed floating, now seemed flying Coming nearer, nearer, nearer. Was it Brick-Er, the self-made one, Or the Bob-Taft from Ohio? Or the great Shu-Shu-Shu-Tom-Tom The crusading one called Catch-'Em, The famed warrior on rackets, Baritone from far Owosso Known to all the tribes as Dew-Eh? None of these! But delegations, Delegations from the prairies, Delegations from the cities, Come by birch canoe with paddles, Trying out their vocal organs. And the mighty Flying Eagle, With his hands aloft extended, Waited full of exultation. Saying in his best make manner: "Beautiful the sun, oh palsies, Bright the prospects are, oh walsics. "Never bloomed the chance so brightly, Never shone the outlook better!" And the delegates made answer: "Not so fast, best-seller chieftain, "Take it easy, global airman, "We admit your deeds of valor "But as yet 'tis early Springtime; "Gentle June Is still far distant, "Anything is apt to happen, "Keep your shirt on, keep your shirt on!" And the Brick-Er and the Dew-Eh From their haunts among the fend-lands fend-lands Screamed "Farewell, oh, Wen-Del-Will-Kie; "We're your buddies, we're your tribesmen, "But the battle is the pay-off!" And the Wen-Del-Will-Kle answered, "How I wonder, how I wonder!" AMERICAN DIALOGUES "There's a fortune in it for you." "Now look here, if you expect to get anywhere with this proposition, don't depress me." . Louis Schwartz, a New York gat-con gat-con known as "Louie the Waiter" has personally sold four million dollars' dol-lars' worth of war bonds, a record to be proud of. It occurs to us that possibly he took to selling bomis be cause they are the only thing a customer cus-tomer could ask for and get, We can't help wondering if Mr. Schwartz, when a customer say si "I'll take a bond, medium-well," replies, re-plies, "but remember no butter." The war department has ruled that dogs in the war may be cited but not decorated. Fido would rather rath-er have a bone, anyhow. How about a Distinguished Service Knuckle With Meat Attached A senator has introduced a bill asking for an investigation into the matter of why shirttails are getting shorter and shorter. It could be merely a matter of suspenders get-ing get-ing weaker and weaker. " Japan intends to remove admirals ad-mirals and generals every time Un-cle Un-cle Sam kicks her in the pants she will soon be running her war entirely through first sergeants and cor porals. Two big hosiery manufacturers have bee fine(J mm OPA ceilings. It can't be SaTd Zy didn't have a leg to stand on Wanna Bet? "However much the storm ma, rage around our fortress, the dav will come when from behind the dark clouds the sun will shine and smile on s."-Adolf Ilitl e cent address to Uie German pe'pE As a weather prophet Hitler is go-ing go-ing to prove a terrible bust, too Ima Dodo says she can't see why the gum makers don't adopt SS new song -Chew. Chew. Baby'- as . radio theme song. y " " |
