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Show VfJhLPhillipr WW WNL mm LUKE AND ELMER ON SACRIFICE Luke 1 suppose you've heard the President's warnings on the sacrifices sacri-fices every American man and woman wom-an will hove to meet now that the all-out aid program is in full swing. Elmer Yes, and no truer word was ever spoken. But I doubt that more than one American in a thousand thou-sand appreciates it. Luke I hope it don't come to a point where I have to stay home weeK-enas. Elmer There you gol You're a typical case. You are one of the great army of Americans who don't mind sacrificing sacri-ficing as long as it don't make 'em lay up the big car, shorten up the pleasure trips or cut down on the night club parties. par-ties. Luke Ain't a guy got a right to his own idea of what a sacrifice means? Elmer Not up to the point where he thinks it's strictly a baseball term. Luke You don't expect people to go around demanding a chance to sacrifice, do you? Elmer Not yet, but I think It will be strictly a routine impulse before be-fore the year is over. Mr. Roosevelt Roose-velt gave a plain warning in strong language, but the people still need to be stirred up to a full appreciation apprecia-tion of what it all really means. This country has been in an atmosphere of marathon waltzing, express speedways, de luxe settings, special upholstery and bottle feeding for so many years that too many people still think it's a sacrifice to get up the first time the alarm goes off instead of waiting for the repeat. Luke I guess maybe you're right. I know some fellers who would think they was making the sacrifice of a lifetime if they had to work twenty minutes overtime in even a soft Job like judging a Miss America contest. Elmer And I could point out a lot of 'em who could applaud every word the President Presi-dent said on sacrifice sac-rifice and then set up a yelp if on their way downtown In an imperial limousine limou-sine they got held up three minutes Dy a aerense parade. Luke I read where some guy made squawk the other day because be-cause a new defense aviation base was so close to his golf course that It made him nervous while putting. Elmer You can find plenty of people who think a major sacrifice is involved if the government gives priority to the shipment of bombers as against pool tables and electric music boxes. THE PENCIL SHARPENER You'll find this odd utensil In every office joint: It sharpens up your pencil And then breaks off the point! Merrill Chilcote. Can You Remember-Away Remember-Away back when cigarettes were said to stunt growth? We understand Harold Ickes hadn't been at sea on the President's ' yacht an hour before he was advocating ad-vocating federal censorship of the waves. Hitler Is the kind of man who not only celebrates spring by shooting the first robin but justifies it on the ground it was planning to attack him. John Kieran's new tome, "Natun Notes," has reached this department. depart-ment. John says that the dragon fly or "darning needle" does not sew up your ears as we were taught in childhood, but is harmless, and in fact, beneficial. If your ear has been sewn up a dragon fly is sc kind and gentle it will take the stitches out, we take it YOU'RE A ROOKIE DRAFTEE WHEN 1- You take reprimands from cor porals seriously. 2- You're a low private but you have the idea it is necessary to yell at others when given a detail to direct. 3- You demand three helpings of chow but write home that the food Is lousy. 4- You always let the sergeant mow you finished a job quicker than !head thlnkin8 " eU you A B. Watac. OUT OF THE RED The New York board of educa ion has made membership hi any .ommunist. Fascist or Nazi groun .ufflcent ground, for dismissal of my teacher in a city college. It got round at last to the belief that the ig red professor should never su-.ersede su-.ersede the little red schoolhouse. A WIFE'S WORST FAULT Ul my protests do not faze her-he her-he UU cIoU -till with my razor -Merrill Chilcote. |