| Show Smooth SneSk Thieves and the Fire nn beats the world how clever the sneak thieves in New York have become be-come said an Eastern millionaire to apart a-part of friends who were enlerlalnlng him at the Chicago club the other evenIng even-Ing Im over the country a good deal and let no tell you there Is nothing in i this or any other city to compare with the sneaks clown home Youve heard of course how Capt Lanlry sent out his sleuths to enter our houses Just to show us how careless we are about guarding against thieves He may have taught some a lesson r learned a good deal more from the genuine crooks themselves them-selves I live In Lanlrys precinct said the wealthy Easterner and I had an experience ex-perience with at least ten thieves Inside of an hour the other morning Perhans Lantry was trying to fool me too Tjut I dont think so I think that my callers were all real thieves but they didnt find me careless Its true the front door was wide open but there was a line of hose running run-ning through It up to tie roof and the i hall was full of firemen The house next door to me was on fire Servants were jumpIng from tho windows two persons were killed and there was great excitement We were all abed when the fire started but there was only a twelve Inch party wall between my house and the one that was burning My wife was awakened by creams and thought the neighbors were being murdered and robbed She looked out of the window ot and saw the flames and then warned everybody in our house Our servants and thc members of the family all huddled together downstairs In the parlor We were all safe so far I a life was concerned and I was trying to think what was the best thing to do next when my work was cut out for me by the arrival of the vanguard of time thieves Im almost willing to bet that the crooks were on the block before the firemen fire-men got there The first arrival rang my bell and when I opened the door he pretended to be In a great hurry to do something useful Ire kept wheezing and gasping so thai hed appear to be out of breath from running just a office of-fice boys do when they come In late That first thief didnt have a badge on his coat or cap nor n stitch of uniform uni-form to indicate that he represented any company but he had great nerve Im a lineman he gasped between short breaths There are five dead wires 1 on the roof and I must get right up there to repair them Then before I had a chance to open my mouth he dived by me Into the hall and made for the stairs He had gone up three or four steps when I grabbed him by the ankle and yanked him back and slid him down the front steps feet first firstI I was too hot put for the moment even to tell him that he was a liar and that there hadnt been a wire on the roof for years because the wires were all In one cable strung along the top of the back fence Im hanged if the second thief wasnt so prompt in getting there that he had to step over tho first one slipping downtime down-time steps to get at my door bell He was all out of breath too blurted out something about the gas pipes and Jumped for the stairs fI tackled him at first about the waistline waist-line and he went the way the first one hud gone The other thieves didnt have to stop to ring the bell for the firemen came In then with the hose arid that kept the door open From the way I pitched em out after af-ter that youd thought I was saving furniture fur-niture from the fire One neighbor who I was watching me from across the street did come over after the fire was out and congratulated me on saving the lives of so many young men l these thieves were under 30 No less than six of them paid they were linemen and each one of the six tried to give me a song and dance about live dead wires on the roof One of them did have some respect for my Intelligence Instead of trying to butt In emptyhanded with n flimsy excuse to go upstairs and steal thIngs he came up the steps looking as worried and businesslike UK he knew how and with n coil of telephone wire In his hand handHe was so sure that that trick would fool me that he didnt say a word but Just pointed to his wire and then to the roof and then made a break for the I stairs I tripped him too Jammed the coil down over his head and the only thIng that saved his neck from being broken was that when he landed on the sidewalk his shoulder struck first J One thief pretended that he was n fireman He wasnt in uniform but he had on some sort of badge and came uptime up-time steps with Ills hands on a line of hose Ho calc lo the different firemen In my house and said Hello Bill to one and Hot work old man to another and Save the babies Tom to n third but none of the firemen paid any attention atten-tion to him so I bowled him out too Hadnt had so much exercise since I was a youngster There was one other man with a piece of tin on Ws coat and he had more nerve than all the rest put together I j threw him out once but he came up the steps again pointing to his badge and accompanied by a policeman The cop said that the man had a badge and was all right That was the limit Why that crook hadnt been out of Jail long enough to get rid of the prison pallor but the cop was too thick to notice that I threw the fellowdown the steps again and then said to the policeman Have I got to fight the polIce force as well as all the thieves in New York to protect my property fiom being looted I I That cop kept guard at my door for the rest of the morning and didnt try to Introduce any more thieves into good society 11 think that these firefollowing thieves must have a den somewhere near Fifth avenue thats equipped with a lire alarm gong Thats the only explanation ex-planation of their promptness at getting get-ting to every private dwellinghouse fire no mailer wtfiat the hour Chicago Inter Ocean |
