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Show L EVENING, APBIL 25, 1890. . " THE SALT LAKE Tnrws. FRIDAY ttrive DEALERS IN--H I , inenc, apparently arrived at cne conclu-sion ha was a gentleman and forthwith asked if he would not accept a box a much preferable and wore expensive situation for bis lady and himself. "I make this suggestion," continued the courteous and diplomatic represen-tative, "because should you appear in the stalls not in full dress you would at-tract an embarrassing amount of notice as the only persons that had been pre-vented, for some cause or other, from observing the usual formality. I feel sure that under the circumstances you will find this box more agreeable." "Meat way of putting it, wasnt it?" said the narrator chipperly, "and so En-glish, you know I" Clothier and Fur-nisher. The Dreit Suit in England. An experience recently told me of a visit to the London Lyceum theatre a twelvemonth since verifies the state-ment as to the positive rule of some of the English playhouses not to admit ladies or gentlemen to the stalls unless they are iu evening dress. The American had had a busy day of it, and found that it was too late to put himself into his dress suit, as was liis custom when going to the thea-tre, and hurried off in his ordinary morn-ing suit with his wife to witness the per-formance of Henry Irving in "The Dead Heart." At the box office he tendered . his money for a couple of stalls. The off-icial looJied.theanDlicant. aver for.a uio- - national OF SALT LAKE CITY. Capital ......$250,000.00 No. II E. First Booth streak DIRECTORS : B. 6, Balch, Fres't. G. M. Downey, Vios-PrM-'t Thou. Marshal. F. . Buryiuser, P. H. Auerbach. D. ( Bacon, John J. Daly, W. P. Noble, J. W. Donnelian, Cashier. Transacts a genoral banking business in all branches. Sells Sight Drafts on the principal cities of the world. Issues Circular Letters of Credit and Postal Money Orders on all parts of Europe and the Orient. Collections promptly at-tended to. Loans money at the lowest rates and on the best terms prevailing in this market. . . . Sole Agents for James Means $3 Shoi , ilSpenoeT& Kimball' ' ' 160 Main Street. Happy Hour Dental Company. -- - Two Ladies, two yCv5'. Gentlemen. Our mt&iW prices MO) per rhM-fM-' vestment, Cleaning ami tSLTW$5f whitcniiiR the t'th. new pro-''4g- . $1 ; cxamin-"- r iition and trcitl- - meut free of charge. Finest gold and up. Teeth extracted positively without pain and danger by use of our new anesthetic compound aid free of charge on Wednesdays; couio curly. . Silver or amalgam idlings, $1; phos-phate and other iilling, Full set of best teeth. S3 and up, ac-cording to material in base plate. Mrs. Buck and Miss Weaverling of this pomjiany eepeeially solicit the pat-ron ago of ladies. Finest work; perfect, satisfaction guaranteed. Respectfully, Haitv li"t it Dkntai. Co. Olllcc in Wasatch Block. Capital Fully Paid, .$400,000.00 Union National Bank, UNITED STATES DEF0SIT0BY Transacts a General Banling Business. Safe Deposit Vaults Fire and Burglar Proof. Rents from $5 to $25 per Annum. J. K. WALKER, President, M. II. WAI.KKR, M.J. CHEESMAN. Casliior, I,. H. VARNSWOItTH, Asst. Canhler, J, K WALKER, Jr., Asst. Cashier.. THE CULLEN. THE Modern Hotel - OF SALT LAKE CITY. S. C. EW1SG, Proprietor. WE HANDLE ) Business, Rositee ani Country Prop IMPROVED AND UNIMPROVED. Parties wishing to buy or sell Realty, had better see us. Our motto: Profits and Quick Turns." Correspondence bohcited. W.L BARRET & C( 207 S. Main St., Salt take City, Utah. O'REILLY'S - One-Pric- e Store. Jvcep n FvllUneof CLOTHHTG- - And Gents' Furnishing Goods. Boots, Hals, Trunks, Valises, Blankets, Etc., Etc. Wc never misrepresent goods. We guarantee, sa tiffact ion, We are never undersold, and, We hacv only ONE PitICE Orders by Mail Receive Careful Attention. 210 Muiu Street, two doors south of the White House. WELLS, FARGO & GO'S Salt Lake City, Utah AND SELLS EXCHANGE, MAKES B0Y8 transfers oa the principal cities of the United States and Europe, and on all points on the Pacific Coast. Issues letters of credit, available in theprin. cipal oitiea of the world. Bpenial attention given to the selling ot ores ana ballion. Advances made on consignments at lowest "particular attention given to collections bronghoat Utah, Nevada and adjoining Tern-one- s. Accounts solicited. CORRESPONDENTS: Wells, Fargo A Co ..London Wells, Faro & Co New York Maverick National Bank Boston First National Bank Omaha First National Bank Denver Merchant's National Bank Chicago Boatmen's Savings Bank St Lonis Wells, Fargo 4 Co Ban Francisco Tames H. Baooh Feaki L. Holland President. Cashier. Bank of Salt Lake. SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH. General Banking Business Transacted. Interest Paid on Time Deposits. Exchange Bought and Sold. Money to Lend on Real Estate from one to five years time. MIDDLEMISS, VAN DYKE & CO., Real Estate and Mine ' 156 Main St., Salt Lake City, Utah McCORNICK & CO., SALT LAKE, UTAH Carefvl attention giren to the Sale of Ores and Bullion. He solicit Consifinnients, guar-anteti-highest market prices. COLLECTIONS MAD?AT LOWEST RATES ACTIVE JfCWTS SOLICITED. - CORRESPONDENTS: New York 1 mp. and Trad. Nat. Bank, Chem-ical Nat. Bank. Kotttitxe Bros. Chicago OoinuiMTlul Nat. Bank. Han Francisco Flret Nat, liauk, h Nat. Bank. Omaha Omaha Nat. Bank. St.. Louts State Bank of St. Louis. Kansas City Nat. Bank ot Kansas City. Denver-Den- ver Nat. Bank, city Nat, Hank London, Knglaad Messrs. Martin & Co., 33 Lombard street F. AUERBAGH & 111 WE CARRY AN IMMENSE STOCK OF FINE DRY GOODS Millinery, Cloaks, Ladies' Underwear, Te mings, Carpets, Curtains, Ladies' and Children's Shoes, Boys' and Chi-ldren's Clothing, Jersey Suits, Kilts, Etc. We Offer This Week 800 Child's stylish Dresses, just received, at the following tempting prices: 6 years at ).7i; 8 years, 4: 10 years, H.35, aud 13 years, $4.50. The matenaU", W workmanship of these Dresses make them KELLY & COMPANY Printers, Blank-Boo- h Makers and Stationers. No. 46 W. Second Souta St., Salt Lake, - Utati OUR facilities for doing first-cla- ss Job are of the newest end beet, rjOOKS Knletl, Printed and Bonnd to Order. JS Samples of Railroad, Mining, Bank and Meroantile Work always on hand, COMPLETE line of Office Supplies, most approved labor-savin- g and economical inventions. PRICES LOW. CALL ON US. Price & Clark, Dealers in Poultry and all Kinds of Game I'ROITS, VEGETABLES, EfC, IN SEASON. No. 58 W. First South Street, Oppositt Kimball Block. La. S. L. COLORADO AGEN0I LOUISIANA STATE LOT-TERY COMPANY, Tlrkots sold and Information furnished. Tel-egraphic reports received the same day of drawlnjr and furnished to all who purchase ttr kets of me. oi)lr-lu- list of all drawings fur-nished on application and mailed to all out of town purchasers. I will cash prizes that may be drawn by tickets drawu by me, In full with-out discount. Orders by mall Riven prompt atteutton. Frank L. M. Smith. P. O. Box 41. Turf Exchange, South Pueblo. aLKAH TITLI gEAL ESTATE AGENCY DmLoviinas, Kiai E3T.r,"mining Stocks, Branch. Court House, Denver, Col. Manager. --THE BARGAINS OF THE SEASON Ir you want an Infant's Coat or cloak NOTE THE FOLLOWING PRICE t Infants' Union Cashmere Coats in Tan, Blue and Cream, at $1.50, 11.75 and P. Infants' fine Coats in Cream and Tans, 13.85, fci.7S. tS. i. , - a., Splendidly embroidered Infants' Long Cloaks, at 13.75, 3.75, 14.50, $4.75, 86.50 ana ""' Cream and Tan. 30 pieces double wide Dress Goods.in new Spring shades, at 37Wc. a vaid. 1 lot of Ladies' fast Black Hose, full regular, at 20c., sold everywhere at 30c. 1 lot of striped, fast Black Hose, colored toe and heel. 50c., cheap at 73c. ! i Chlln's 'ast Black, ribbed Lisle Thread Hose, sizes 5 to 8. at 30c., regular pm-- ot Boys' fast Black Bicycle Hose, full English, double knee and toe, at II, reguWJS 1 lot each of Ladies' ribbed vests, just opened, at UKc, Sc., 25c, 30c., up to Jl."" value in this city. 1 lot, each of high Novelties in Ladles' Windsor Ties, at 35c., 50c., 75c.. II. have received quite an Assortment of Ladies' ready-mad- e Calico and Sateen w hich we offer at very LOW PRICES, from HOc. each upwards. SO pieces each Colored Modras Scrim in latest designs aud colorings, at 10c., 20c. ana 1 lot of Black and Colored Silk Panels, at 11.35 each, worth SU WARWICK HIGH-GRA- DE SAFETY BICYCLE. I carry a stock of SAFETY BICYCLES at $38.00, $35.00, $40.00, $60.00, $75.00, $113.00, $135.00, TRICYCLES and VE-LOCIPEDES. In purchasing from me you have a stock to select from aud do not have to wait. Largest Stock and Lowest Prices on Sporting Goods, Guns, Cutlery, eto. SHOT-GUN- S AT COST. Bicycle aud Gun Repairing. Agent CALIGRArH WRITING MACHINE Carbons, Itibbona and Paper. M. IR.. EVANS 224 W. 2d South St., Salt Lake City. Our Carpet Department Has received beautiful Gobelins, Moquets, Velvet, Body Brussels and Ingrains, rangiS 25c. ier yard to $3.n0 per vard. ,. Also new Curtains in Swis3 Tambour, Nottinghams and Silk, ranging from tl to W 5 P OUR CHILDREN'S CLOTHING DEP'1 Has received splendid lot of Jersey Suits ransinirfrom 4 to 8 vears, and Kilts ran to 5 years. I or variety of style, taste and wnrkmaushiv they are unsur-passed. Prices ranging from 3.5U to 18 each. Mail Orders Solicited from Fai and Near! We Guarantee Satisfaction, or Monej R ESTABLISHED 1864. ONE PRICE TO tf F. AUERBACH & BR! NOBLE, W00B & CO, The onfy Exclusive Hatters In Salt Lake Roman's lepretd HaU,Drt lnth World, 261 SMain SU inspiration! 1 He was a peasant tolllns 'mid the sheaves From daw to dew among the waning fratn What time he went afield In early morn, The Wars shone above the morning mist; And when at eve he reached his cotlase door, Ho heard the plovers calling to the nlfcht. One day, while 'neata his measured rbythmlo stroke Fell swath on swath of precious golden grain, She came across the fields a vision rare The prlucpss. good and pure and beautiful, Who, smiling oa biin an she passed him by, Knew not that she had filled his heart wltii love And soul with music. Yet from that day forth His fellow workers heard bis sweet sad songs. And wondered at their comrade as he sang. Soon far beyond the humble ruttle town His master muslo touched the hearts of men. Until the world had claimed him as her own. And wreathed him poet with the laurel crown. One day he found his wandering steps astray Where bo had seen the vision of his soul. . "If she," lie thought, "had been a peasant maid, And I a prince had seen her toilinff there. How happy now would be these w eary days" At this he threw hlrnBfllf upon the sheaves Until the length niiig shadows eastward thrown Had blended with the gently deep'uicg gloom Until across the misty etorllt meads Ho heard the plovers calling to the niht. Sanborn Govo Tenney in Harper's, A Curious Fulplt. A curious colonial relio known as the "open and shut pulpit," has been eold Danielsonvillo, Conn. It had been in the Read family for 160 years, and was the property of Jtev. Amos Read, the first Baptist minister in the state. Mr. Head had to travel great distances in order to "spread the gospel," and had his pulpit made to take with him. It opens and shuts with hinges like a chest whose lid is very much larger than the box part. When the pulpit is shut up it is seem-ingly a fair sized box; opened, the solid lid stands straight before the preacher, a pulpit standard, on which the minister lays his Biblo and hymn book, and be-hind which he discourses, standing on the other part of the box. Rev. Amos Read, when ho set forth to preach in distant parts, just strapped up his pulpit, balanced it on hi hor3es back and trot-ted forth, carrying church as well as gospel with him. Philadelphia Ledger. A DK That Plow. This recalls the story of the grey-hound, whose master was an expert bi-cyclist, and was accustomed to run down bill, with his legs tucked up on the ma-chine. The greyhound, a speedy and highly intelligent creature, always seem-ed to take extreme pleasure in this feat, and one day, to his master's astonish-ment, suddenly drew all his legs under him and shot past the bicyclo at nn ele-vation of some five feet from the ground. Three times only, in the course of a long descent, he just touched the ground with his left hind foot, and met his master at the foot of the" hill witli frisks and bounds, having traveled nearly three hundred yards in the air. It is a curious fact, but the chronicle asserts that, on the death of'this dog, elementary wings were found on his shoulder blades, which seems to indicate that ho had a natural predilection for flying. London Times. Traveling a Modern Passion. Now the gadfly which pursued poor Io seems to have stung us all, and we flit about the globe restlessly, till it has nearly come to pass that everybody who has a house has let it to somebody else, and the last place to expert to find a man is nt home. A general game of amuses the best society of Europe and America all the summer and much of the winter. The humblest village school child expects two or three annual excursions; every servant and shop hand stipulates for holidays long enough to pay distant visits; in short, our lives are becoming much like those of festive gnats at play of a warm even-ing. Sometimes we pause to suck a flower or to bite somebody, but we soon return to the perpetual locomotion which seems to possess unfailing charm. Fran-ces Power Uobbe in Forum. LIFE K A ITIT FLAT. The Man Who Ha Beon There Tells All About Folding Beds and Other Arangements of the Place. THE DEESS SUIT OF ENGLAND. A Curious Pulpit in ConnecticutThe PasBion for Traveling Curious Dogs and Othor Tales. t inow considerable about high Me. i bave lived in the second or third stories cf desirable flats or modern houses since I Avas put into short dresses. I have viewed the world from exalted heights, especially when I hung clothes in the fnrret on wash days, and I am prepared to say that although some people pay xtra to live on the first floor frout, they miss the very richness of existence. Cream always rises to the top. ' I have just moved out of apartments m the second story of a very narrow house. I think the architect who planned the building must havo done it With one eye. Its whole width accom-modated the width of an apartment of ordinary size, so, instead of the rooms branching off from one another iu their usual convenient fashion, they had formed a procession in Indian file from the front elevation to the coal house. If you were in the kite lion you bad to go through every room iu order to get to the front room. You couldn't wander tbout that house you could only go through it. The family of which lama proud and valued member is not a small one. Fam-ilies in flats never are. You will realize the truth of this if you ever come to live on the floor underneath one of them. I hope that no girl will ever tell one of my brothers that she will be a sister to him. There are too many of us now. THB OMNIPRESENT FOLDING BED. One of the results of large families living in small fiats is the folding bed. They lean against the wall, trying to look like a book case or a cabinet organ, but I can always tell them. When I see piece of furniture looming up like a monument factory, with a kind of noth-ing in particular air about it, then I know that it is a bed in disguise. TJur parlor was situated about midway down the line of rooms so as to connect with the front stairs. Two of us girls bad a folding bed in there. We used to arrange vases and photograph holders opon it during the daytime in our to conceal its identity. Every other room except the dining room and Bulinary department was the station for bed, and when we had company to stay all night we used to spread canvas cots In the back hall. I used to hum a sweet little song about "Oh, put mo in my little eot. mother!" but since affording accom-modations for my visiting relatives by pending a few nights out in the back ball on a bier, with a tent roof for a tick, bave refrained from petitioning my mother to do any such thing. It seems natural to those not accus-tomed to dressing rooms to take off and put on their clothes in the bedroom, con-sequently we used to dress and undress ill over the house. Any one by simply walking onco through our flat in the lead of night could have fallen over inough wearing apparel to have set him op in the clothing business. RECEIVING CALLERS. There was some inconvenience in this predominance of dressing rooms, espe-Diul- ly if any one called in the daytime before our toilets were complete or in the oight time after any of us had retired. We never heard the outside front door bell ring but its sound smoto us with terror. We would fly from all parts of the house and congregate at the head of the stairs to hear if whut we dreaded was true that the caller was ours, It often was. Then the real earnest work began. One of us tore off her apron, tied her ihoe, combed out her front hair and tcoured her teeth preparatory to opening our then carefully closed door. Others flew down the length of our rooms gath- - wing dress waists, petticoats, bath tow-il- s, accordion skirts, nightgowns and the like as they went. We were almost sure to leave a piece of raiment or some toilet trticie in a conspicuous place. It seemed to bo fate. People coming up Btalrs to see us al-ways heard a loud crashing and sounds Df flying feet, but after they knocked upon the cherry stained panels all was till. We used to stop just where we happened to be when the knock came. OTHER FEATUltKS. .' One cold winter's evening I stopped in t small clothes press, which opened into the parlor, and I was obliged to exist .there for two hours and a half while my youngest sister talked to a man about the iikelihood of finding ten varieties of orchids at Portage Falls. . One time when niy basque was hang-ing on a door knob in the kitchen, when I was in the front room, and two callers In seal sacks were awaiting mo in the parlor, I had to hail our grocery man's errand boy aa he was going by with a lack of flour and send him around into the kitchen with an order for my basque. I thought delivering basqueo would come rather natural to one used to carrying sacks. He brought it around to the front of the house all right, and I fished it up with a gilt cord of our mantel lambre-quin. . Owing to the marriage of several of my nisters and the raising of the salaries of several of my brothers, we have fallen into the position where it seems incum-bent upon us to live in tho style which our income demands, and we have con-cluded to rent an entire house. From lny long experience in flats I know that the ringing of a door bell will always strike terror to my soul, and I know that I shall never entertain company without glancing uneasily at tho sofa to see if we threw those stockings clear under, out of iight. Buffalo Express. Improved Sounding Slachlne. The old method of "heaving the lead" was a cumbrous and often unreliable process, which occupied a considerable time, and could only bo performed when the vessel was brought to or going at a very moderate speed. With Sir William Thomson's improved sounding machine the depth can be accurately found with little trouble and without altering the speed of the vessel. A line of soundings can be taken with great ease and the ship's place be made known by compari-son with the chart long before she comes near to any dangerous position. For steamships going at a great speed, and especially when ncaring land, the use of this machine is absolutely indispensable. New York Commercial Advertiser. A Dog That LUces Gas. At the Dog's Grotto, one of the curi-osities maintained near Rojo, Italy, there is a cave, the lower part of which is said to be tilled with deadly gas, so that while a man can walk about unharmed a dog breathing the lower air is asphyx-iated. To prove it they have a dog called Columba that is taken into the cave whenever a visitor appears, and that, after a short time, seems overcome by the alleged gas and has to be carried out and resuscitated in the fresh air. The dog is so well trained that whenever she sees a stranger approaching slie gets up and trots off to the cave to get her as-phyxiation. This happens many times a day, but the dog seems none tno worse for it. New York Sun. A Man with I run Nerve. An exceedingly cheeky thief made his appearance in Boston one day recently. Ho was dressed in overalls. He went into the office of a life insurance com-pany and, whilo whistling one of the latest tunes, began to unscrew from the wall of a toilet room on the fourth floor a mirror valued at about $20. Fully twenty occupants of the building saw the man at work, and everybody thought ho had been hired either to repair the glass or clean it, ..They did not suspect anything was wrong until after he left. Then it was learned he was a thief. He walked down the four flights of stairs and left by means of the front door.- - A Safncloua Doff. A correspondent tells a curious story of animal sagacity. He once knew a dog who used to run on the legs of one sido a sort of one sided sharabler. The animal would start in the usual way, and when he had acquired a sufficient momentum tuck up the legs of one side and, leaning over toward the other sido, scamper along on two legs until tired. He would then acquire fresh impetus, and give the other legs a turn at this ex-hilarating exercise. The correspondent writes from Cyprus, not Crete. London Field. "Ketched" Cp with Them. Ignatius Donnelly sometimes tells this anecdote from the platform: An old farmer in the south was taking his first trip on a railway train. The equipment was poor and the road was rough and in bad condition, so that the train made poor time. Suddenly the engine whistled. "What's the matter?" asked the farmer, anxiously. "Oh," said a fellow pas-senger, "there are some cows on the track and they are whistling to scare them off." The train ran along slowly a few miles farther, when the whistle sounded again. The farmer suddenly started and then exclaimed: "Dlowed if we haven't ketched up with them cows again." A Hare BelTo Discovered. Near Patras a sarcophagus has been discovered richly sculptured. The bas relief represents a wild boar bunt, in which are seen the huntsmen divided into two groups, seven of them being without beard and one bearded, This last is in the act of stopping a boar, run-ning at full speed, and has bis foot on the snout. The rest are pressing for-ward to slay the animal with hatchets and arrows. The work ia highly fin-ished and of the Roman period, but very probably copied from an original of Hel-lenic workmanship, Inside the sarco-phagus a skeleton was fouud, Chicago Herald. Rarity of the Cormorant. It seems rather strange that, while skins and eggs of the great auk are so highly valued, the public rarely hear of Pallas' cormorant, the extinction of which in the North Pacific corresponds to that of the groat auk in the North Atlan-tic Only four specimens of Pallas' cor-morant are known to exist in museums; no one possesses its eggs; and no bones were found or preserved until Mr. Leon-har- d Stejneger, of the Smithsonian insti-tution, was so fortunate somo years ago as to rescue a few of them. Yet this btr wa3 the largest and handsomest of its tribe. New York Ledger. The Queen's IlncEaee. Among the impedimenta with which the Queen started on her continental tour may be mentioned three coachmen, nine grooms, eight horses, one donkey, three carriages, seventy-twotrunk- three special beds, a special cooking stove, wine, two doctors, one surgeon, one sur-geon accoucheur for the Princess Bea-trice, three ladies in waiting, nine women servants, ono lord, two equerries and seven dogs. London Letter. A Costly Warn. The costliest horse barn in the world belongs to D. E. Grouse aud is located at Syracuse, N. Y. It has now cost the owner, a millionaire horseman, some-- thing like $700,000. Incidental expenses will make the stable cost little short of a round million. St. Louis Republic. ' . otouce. "Yes," Raid the learned youth, "I reached forward and struck him a blow on the optic, and a minute later his alter ego whs in mourning." "His what?" inquired tho fond parent. "His alter ego his other eye, you know." Boston Transcript. Rio Grandfi Western Railway. SCENIC LINE OF THE WOULD The only Trans-- The only line to continental Line Denver with io passing through of carwnd on II Ulti changs Salt Lake City. to Chicago. Central Time table to lake effect from Aoreuiber 15, 1881): EAST BOUND TBAIKS. No. 3 No. 4 Atlantic Atlantic Mall. Kxprc-u-s Leave ORdcn 11:10 a.m. 5:40 p.m. Arrive Salt Lake 10:H0 a.m. 7:05 p.m. Leave Salt Lake 10:85 a.m. 7:15 p.m. Arrive Vvovn l'.'MOp.m. :lrt p.m. Leave Pmvo 18:30 p.m. 9:i p.m. Arrive Oreen River 6:45 p.m. 4 :.'). a.m. Leave (liven River 7:10 p.m. 4:10 a.m. Arrive Pueblo 8:05 p.m. :() a.m. AgivIenye 7:45 p.n;. 7:15 a.m. WEST HOUND TK A INj Nofi No. ;l Pacific Pacific Mail. Kxprcss Leave Denver 8:00 a.m. 8:00 p.m. Leave Pueblo 1 M p.m. 1S:40 a.m. Arrive Green Uiver 9:50 a.m. p.m. Leave liieen Kr.er 10:10 a.m. u:ii p.m Arrive Provo 4:50 p.m. 6:00 a.m. Leave Pmvo 5:15 p.m. 6:uo a.m. Arrive Salt Lake 6:55 p.m. 7:40 a.m. Leavo Sail Lake 7:04 p.m. 7:60 a.m. Arrive Q.gilen SM p.m. 0:10 a.m. Pullman Palace and Buffet Sleeping cars on at! through trains. Morton rerltninc cluir cars fiie between Salt Lake City and Provo on Trains 1 and 3. D. C. DODGE. J. H. BENNETT, len. Manager. Gen. I'aiw. Ag Wasn't Loin Bli Memory. Scene Scotch railway Btation. Ticket collector, in making his collection, finds hu old gentleman fumbling in his pockets for his ticket. Ticket Collector Tickets, please. Old Gentleman I'm just lookin'forit. Ticket Collector Well.I'll look in again In a few minutes. Bee and have it ready then. Ticket colleotor returns shortly j but the old gentleman is still hunting for it. Ticket Collector (suddenly) Why, you have it in your mouth, man! Old Gentleman (giving him the ticket) Oh, so I hae! ' Here you are! . Another gentleman in the carriage, as the train moves on, to first gentleman I'm afraid your losing your memory, sir. Old Gentleman Nao fear o' that; nae fear o' that! The ticket was a fornicht ould, and I wis jist sookin' the date affti Tableau. Argonaut. A French company is pushing a scheme for piercing the Faucilles by a tunnel, which would shorten tho distance be-tween Paris and Geneva by six hours. The Swiss government is against it be-cause both outlets of the tunnel would be in French territory. I The population of Iceland diminished 2,400 between 1SS5 and 1888. being ot the close of the latter year 69,224. Tho decline is due to emigration to America. The native fishermen complaWi that their business is being ruined by the Eng-lish fishing stcanwrs. Not Afraid of Microbe.. Dr. George Duttan, a Boston physician, at a meeting of the American Health so-ciety, of which he is president, made this challenge: "I.ot my medical friendi bring me half a pint of all kinds of ba-cilli aud I will eat them, provided that it I am not sick the next day the microti theorists will forever thereafter hold their peace." A Cheap CompromiAe. Ill crossing Union square the other day a lady dropped her handkerchief, aud a gamin of 10, who noticed the fact, ran after her and restored it. "Thanks, child, thanks!" she replied, ns she received tho dainty fabric from his grimy hand. "Now, then, what can I do for you?" "Nuthink," he replied. "Oh, but I must reward your action in somo way. How shall I do it?" "Well, mum, if you are bound to do it, please give me a hundred dollars in-stead of presenting me with a mansion on Fifth avenue. Taxes is high, and dad is out of work, and we don't want no dead horse to carry these hard times." She made it ten cents and another vote of thanks, and he seemed perfectly satis-Se- d. New.i'adLSlUU i The total population of Greenland at the end of 1S88 was 10,291. There had been 162 deaths during the previous year, of which thirty-on- e had been by drowning from tho native cauoes and ten bj other accidents. |