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Show FOR THE LADIES. The widow's '!mite" the little chap who married the dead man's big, . i bouncing witc. i A lady advertises herself as a'tcacher lor "persons of newly-ac'iuired wealth and dcticicrjt education." The only place in the world where a young lady Is not "misled" is at home. There it id always plain ijusan, or Bet. "Superior" is the favorite Boston feniinine word of commendation, and is applied equally to a bonnet or a sermon, ser-mon, a painting or a pie. Advice to husbands settle as much money upon your wife as you can, for her second husband poor fellow! may not have a sixpence. Judy. The present wife of a BulTalonian objects to his keeping tho memories of her livo predecessors green by weariHg five bands of crape on hia hat. Prince Teek enters the technical pica, that when a man's wife weighs over '0 pounds he can't be expected to l'ultil his duty to tho whole of her. Mrs. Mehitable Piper, the "oldest inhabitant" of Gloucester, Mass., held a levoc on Wednesday in celebration ol her one hundred and twenty-first birthday. birth-day. The latent dodge of young ladies who don't want to "obey" the marriage ceremony, is to repeat in indistinct tones and manner, "love, honor and bo gay." An elderly maiden lady, hearing for the first time that -matches are made in heaven, declared that she didn't care a straw how soon she left this sinful world for a better land. Before Paris bccime mistress of modes, Milan prescribed the model for bonnets, honco tho natno milliner for tho fabrication of the crowning glory of well-dressed womanhood. In Dade county, Georgia recently, Mr. John 1). Asticrs was married to Miss Ivato Ashcrs. The proper thing for the paragraphers to say in this connection is Ashcrs to Ashers. Tho Woman Suffrage association of Webster, Mass., were recently treated by Mrs. John Flint, at whoso house they met, to a pie which was six feet and nine inches in circumference. A western girl who has been well brought up knocks down, it is said, every man that kisses her, and sho is so pretty that half the married and all tho single men in town have black eyes. A Tennessee woman's paper has terms thus singularly graduated: "Three dollars a year to men; one dollar dol-lar and a half to unmarried working-men; working-men; seventy-fivo cents to women with lazy husbands to support," Tho women of Alabama have taken to fox-hunting. They have their "meets," with packs of fox-hounds, &c, all regular, and scamper over the country alter Reynard, much to the grief of the agriculturists. Miss Alta M. Hewlett is a a martyr to the law of Illinois. She studied law and passed an examination, but was denied tho right to practice, and will probably be let loose as a lecturer on tho brutality of men. A young lady who, after kissing a two-year old boy, made the remark: "I lovo to kiss little boys," was exceedingly exceed-ingly surprised by a littlo five-year old girl inquiring "if sho didn't like to kiss big boys, too?" A young lady vaccinator of Boston has taken away much of the custom of the male medicals. The bloods of Beacon street submit their tilgrim fatherly arms with extreme unction to the manipulations of tho charmiog small-pox preventer. |