Show WIT AND HUMOR Chicago Tribune The canvasser with the patent adjustlble flatiron heater had talked 15 minutes without a break when the woman of the house interupted him by I producing a small card and lead pencil and remarking in a calm emolonless way J havent heard a word you have said Please write It on this He looked at the card gasped once or twice and went away with his lips moving nervously but no sound issuing from them Detroit News He seems to be per fectly absorbed in his family Yes even his brothersinlaw sponges on him Datrolt TrlbuneThc newspapers Say the book isnt fit for a woman TO read anen I suppose you will make all haste to rend it Certainly not she replied and it seemed to him that her figure fairly di lated with the access qt womanly dignity I dont believe all I see in the newspapers news-papers Neil 1 should 57 nit Cleveland Plain Dealer Yes I always let people know that my wife is a Republican Re-publican and Im a Democrat It saves me lots of explanation In what way Why when people bear us raising merry turmoil they think of course it is only a party dispute Chicago Tribune Philanthropic Caller at jallMy friend have oou any relig ious convictions Avery Baddun Well I reckon thats What yeu might call em I was sent here for robbin a church Chicago Daily News AdamsHow did you have the nerve to ask old Billyuns lor his daughter Id as soon think of facing a lion in his dsn Monroe Oh it didnt require an extraordinary extra-ordinary amount of courage I did it by telephone Chicago News Crltcfaley the painter says he is thoroughly wedded to his art Well that proves that he is a man of his word How so He always said Hed rather starve than wed for mono and there isnt any doubt that hes doing it Boston Traveler ProfessorYou disturbed dis-turbed my lecture yesterday by loud talk ingStudent tuden Impossible Professor But I heard your til nt1hDn you-r hon + ol1n U L un un 1U U1 my sleep Boston Transcript Uncle George YoUd better take up with Miss Gordon Harry they say she is worth a million f HarryYou dont mean it Uncle Geoire Uncle GeorgeOf common woman I HarryHm Indianapolis Journal It is a wonder tome I to-me said the soeculatlve boarder that g hse ecg n1 I lt more dramas are not written biy physicians I physi-cians They see so much of the ways of I humanity Didnt some doctor write The Heart I of Maryland and The Lights of Lon don asked the cheerful idiot Spare Moments Magistrate to prisoner who is before him for begging What makes you beg Prisoner whining Because I cant get any work your honor Magistrate Would you do work if you could get any Prisoner Gladly J your honor Magistrate What work Prisoner Artthing your honor Magistrate rather stingy with an eye to businessUl have a heap of weeds I want taken out of my ground Would you do that PrlsonerYes your honor only too glad of the job Magistrate You are discharged Prisoner Did you say I was discharged dis-charged your honor Magistrate Yes you are discharged Prisoner Then weed your blooming garden yourself |