Show REAR GUARDS TALE 1 j Bill Nye Writes of tlieCarey Island Relief Expedition 1 1 THE EXPLORERS SET EIGHT 1 Emin TntewIIer Would Have Fen Relieved it He Hadnt Taken the i Oclock i Boat forJioaic I IFOR THE SUNDAY HERALD > BT special j i arrangement With the author 1 So many conflicting stories are now J afloat regarding the conduct of the rearguard rear-guard of the expedition which started I out last Jnly for tup relief of EininTute xviler who was supposed to be somewhere some-where in the jungles of interior Coney Island or Far Roskaway that I make I bold to write this defense of myself and i our party in order that history may as Emerson says give us a fair show l Early in Juno we received permission from Mr Joseph Cook of Boston to explore ex-plore the interior of Coney Island if we would give it back again and I began to loch about me for a suitable company of men to assist me My first selection consisted of Mr Owen S Kinney whose middle initial sometimes adheres to his bohimlest name but who is a loyal gentleman gen-tleman whose clothes fit me I owe him nmeh which I cannot ever repay but he agrees to let me off if I speak kindly of Win in my writings 1 was ilso so fortunate as to secure th > ervices of Eli H Jaggs professor of linrsemanship at the Central Park Acade IXY of Equestrianism also the author of iItW to Overcome the Riding Habit cloth lifty cants paper two bits He var secured partially because of his po lilic il milnence and also because he is a tli irougli connoisseur of spoopju 1 1 He said he would go cheerfully Beside Be-side these two 1 also invited Mr Sawdorf AstorPliice of Lennox Ho is not large II 1 physically but he has a brain which is I what might be called a teeming brain i When he is thinking real earnestly i I you go quite losa to his brain you can hear it purr 1 never saw such a brainy j i cuss n he is His thoughts sometimes I rumble like a telegraph pole ho thinks I so hard I selected him because I wanted want-ed a bunch of picked men and any one I could see that he was a picked man to just look at him He seemed somehow to have been picked too soon He took a banjo with him That also was picked Before we had fairly started he got everything about him to harmonize by having his pockets picked My next thought was to procure the needful food supply for our long journey and obtain permission of my paper to draw on it whenever 1 needed any money I also wrote a editorial regarding re-garding my sagacity and things leaving it to he l printed on the day of my de partr I PI egan to look about me for food and v whang jingang and colored color-ed be jB be used for purposes of traffic i first purchase consisted of a sal hamper of llockford cheese which is an antiscorbutic and also insures absolute ab-solute isolation to its happy possessor 1 fully believe that the Rockford cheese giving it the Anglicized spelling for I am always kind to the Rockford and Limburger cheeses never laying a hand on eyether of them otherwise than i kindness 1 say that the Rockford cheese aside from the Excelsior stench works eat of Newark has no living r rivaL And would also add that its dead rivals would do well t look carefully fr care-fully after their laurels So I got a hamper of this cheese with a little damper in the top which I could open whenever I wanted a little solitude I also procured some biltong and a small mill to use in grinding menlo against the time when we should b beyond the reach of Acker Merrall Condits delivery de-livery wagons I took with me i my inside pocket a email autograph album which 1 1 purposed getting Emin Tute vriler to write into as soon n we had relieved him I said little t my chief who had preceded me via Ocean Grove and Cape May but it was my idea while he was thus leisurely scouting through the game country and tracing the sources of the Passaic t quietly slip i and relieve Emin Tatewiler myself thus compelling my chief to play the rear s I 5 THE START guard act and give me an opportunity by means of I stereopticon and lecture t do a good business with the Young 3Iens Christian association on my return re-turn Mr AstorPlaice said that he would advise me t procure two or three gun bearers who were familiar with the interior in-terior and who had become acclimated I therefore secured two gun bearers for my own use named Sahib Williams and Congo Briggs I 1 got them of Sir George Pullman who said he did not want them any more One of them had lost a cake of soap somewhere between Fort Wayne and Chicago and although he had looked very diligently over every inch of the ground he could not find i so Sir George had t bounce him for the exam ple and in order to preserve the discipline disci-pline Congo Briggs had thoughtlessly shut up one of tho directors children i an upper berth and forgotten about it till lie got into Fortysecond street where the parents discovered that they were short one child Our start was auspicious had armed 1 myselfwith an elephant gun and un express ex-press rifle which with my hat box and fin oil stove were i the hands of my gun bearers We carried with us 3 few macadamized sea biscuit and someim f perviouspie in a shawl strap in case we 1 should not find any pie trees in bearing arrival in the interior We on our nrv itror I i sailed on the 16th and touched at Hell Gate on the same day taking this way I out in order to head off Emin Tute j wiier whom I had some fears might I via Newport and the steamer Pilgrim I i get home before the relief expedition got I ito I i-to Turn i The head of the expedition has stated in one of his magazine articles that we fooled j away too much time at Far Rockaway and also took twothirds of the spoopju i designated for the entire enterprise so j that he ran short a little south of Red I fBahk and was thus compelled to stop I and go into camp for over a week until i t u pagazis could be sent back for more spoopju for which he had to pay the C A 7 1 0 V t 9 I qtt I I iW I I JI r t r I II If I f If f W j > rWjW ki 1 t 11 I i I HUNTING THE ELEPHANT orbitant price sixteen doti per plambo J I i do not know how much a plambo is either > doth I reck a plain low price I I reck I know that we did not stay any longer than necessary at Far Rockaway as some of our party had to get some laundry work done there before wo could proceed to the interior One of our gun I bearers also became violently ill at that II t place fioui eating the rind of a watermelon I water-melon that had been prostrated by the I heat So far a the spoopju i concerned we took what Mr Jaggs thought would be necessary thinking that the main expedition expe-dition perhaps had made other arrangements arrange-ments I also remained a day or two longer at Far Rockaway than had at first been intended partly because I did not know but that Emin might be disguised and stopping there and partly because I wanted to On arriving at Coney Island I intended to leave Mr Owen S Kinney in charge Manhattan Beach Mr Jaggs in charge of Brighton Beach and with Mr Sawd orf AstorPlaics to push on along the low fiat country lying between Pernambuco point and the West End for thus would cut Emin off from other relief expedi tons unless they should come in via the iron steamboat or per droska from Brooklyn Brook-lyn We had only proceeded a little way to the westward when one of u Wang Wan was taken with violent retchings I and paroxysms caused as I afterward learned by overeating the luscious but unripe dingle dangle fruit of the island which grows in great abundance t the I southward and r embles our American popcorn ball I administered a box of large navy blue pills made by a dealer on Broadway whose name and check I did not get in time for use in this report I These pills are about the size of a brass thimble and I think aro called th ne lu ultra or seek no further pill It is by fa the most faithful and painstaking pill I think that I have ever used in my African explorations No matter how far I would go into the interior this pill w there like my good angel urging urgng me and cheering me to go still farther This delay caused by the illness of I Congo Briggs necessitated our return to Brighton Beach where I was also cpm I pled to draw on our paper for more doti This consumed time and money j but I felt confident that if I could reach i the West End before autumn with my I justly celebrated remedy I could certainly cer-tainly relieve Emin Tutewiler before the I main expedition got there My delay was also fortunate I may I add for during my stay I met the great I Aruwimi chief Croker who came t the I coast at th time Ho is the head of the t I powerful tribe of the Aruwimis which dwells to the northward and which gets I I its name from a part of its war cry 1 which is this j Aruwimi or Aginmer i This is uttered in 3 strong guttural tone of voice and serves to tne voic anl encourage and unit the tribe much more than Conjunctio firmat which is the motto j of the Buttennakers union of Orange j I county I After awoeks rest during which our I supply of whang leather epighetti and 1 durable pie gave out so that we were 1 obliged to resort to the hunting case oyster and the wall eyed clam we procured I pro-cured a wad of mealie jag of spoopju and resumed our journey We entered i i the poorly ventilated jungle on the following I fol-lowing evening and camped beneath a I I huge axle tee which was loaded with Vienna bread fruit I must here men lien that this whole country would be j fa more healthful i the jungles could t be better ventilated As is well known the elephant and other noxious fauna noxous I penetrate the jungles and sleep there I nights sometimes as high a three or four in a bed They get up in the morn I ing and go awjiy without doing their chaniberwork with any degree of care r cberwork degee i or airing the jungle even forgetting that I 1 it must be again occupied on the follow agan I ing night As soon a the cannibals of I Coney Island who live off each other are j shown the method of salvation and its absolute freedom from duties and imposts I im-posts I hope that philanthropists ill call their attention to ventilation Those I who may have had charge of elephant for I I any length of time and been thus compelled com-pelled to room with them will remember remem-ber with what paucity of diligence and with want lavishness or neglect tlio > bathed their feet T in their home life gives the jungle an elephantine gves flavor which is bound to keep many of our tropical missionary cafes in the background back-ground for years I Wo hnd a pretty tough journey over the entire trip but made our trusty gun bearers do al the work while we did the best we could We were sustained and soothed during this trying ordeal by the knowledge that we were doing 0 good deed and also that there was nothing for u t do at home t On the 28th of July the largest ek phant I had eve seen hove insight and in an hours timo we had struck his spoor I directed my trusty gun bearer to get ready with the express rifle loaded load-ed with double pointed tacks and barbed I tye also t load up the elephant gun asthe animal seemed now ready to I charge which in less time than i takes j I me t write ifrho had done 1 I I wa somewhat disappointed i the 1 i power and extent of Ms charge however how-ever a I remarked to Congo Briggs at the time for it was really a very reasonable reason-able charge indeed I a short time we had reached the point where I was sure we would run across the spoor of Emin Tutewiler I began to inquire of the natives and to look about me on every hand but I could get no clew of him whatever until I dark when a native who came to my I I tent with some natve ttu which he offered to exchange for colored beads and a small Bible which I was reading gave me my I first news of Emin He said which I afterwardfound to b true that Pamin I had heard that he was shortly to get relieved re-lieved and s he took the 4 oclock boat home homeThe above is written in good faith in order that the public may understand I the true inwardness of expedition and in order that my trusty fellow travelers trav-elers who paid their own expenses and took their lives in one hand as it were and their washing in the other may stand before the public in their true lights and not suffer the grave injustice which others have to thrust other hnvesought thrt upon them Whilst we did not relieve Emin Tutewiler we had it there for him if he ha chose to accept it He could take it or he could let it alone We do not go I around coaxing people to be discovered and relieved by us Both M Jaggs and Mr Sawdorf I AstorPlaiCa will deliver I few lectures this coming season on Insect Life on Ithe Congo and How to Snare Elephant Ele-phant Letters addressed to my care will be just safe as they would I jut a anywhere any-where BILL NYE I Late Chief of the Rear Guard of the EminTutewiler Belief Expedition |