Show A DISSASCD HAT Probably flits mertiiert trick that was ever ll l jed ou H white man W58 played last week in this city acd the fact tbat there is DO vigilance committee com-mittee here is the only reason tbe perpetrators of the trick are alive A business men bad just purcLaied anew a-new etifl hat and he went into u r Buotm with half a dcz ° n friendd to fit tbe hat on his head They all took beer and passed the bat mound so nil coud eee ire One of tbe meanest men ilut ever held a county office went to tbe bar tender and bud a thin slice of Limberger cheese cut off and when the patty were looking si the frescoed ceiling through beer clasecs ths wicked person dipped the cheese under the sweat leatber 01 the hat and tbe man put it on and stalked out The man who owned the bat ij i one of your nervous people who is alwaya 1 complaining of being sick and who feels as though tome dreadful disease wa going to take possession of him and carry him oil He went back to his place of buoines took off his hat and laid it on tbe table and proceeded to answer some letters He thought he detected a em ell and when bis partner ink d him if he didt feel sick be said bo believed be-lieved he did A clerk said it wa < evident that somebodys feet needed washing The man turned pah and aid he guessed he would go borne He met a man on the sidewalk who aid tbe air was full of miasma and in he street car a man who Eat next 10 him moved away to the end of the car pad askei him if he bad just come from Cbicag j The man with the hat said he bad not when tho stranger said they were having a great deal smallpox there and he guessed be would get out and walk and he pulled the bell and jumped off The cold perspiration broke out on the forehead of the man with the new hat and he tcok it oil to wipe bit forehead when tne whole piece of cheeeo eeemtd to roll over and breathe and lb3 man got the full benefit of it and he came near fainting away He got home and hia wife met him and asked what was the matter He said be believed mortification had set in And she I took one whiff ea bo took off his hat and said she should think I it had Where did you get into it eaid she Get into it said tbe man I have not got into anything I but some deadly disease has got hold I of me and I shall not live She told him if any disease that smelted i like that had got bold of him and was going to be chronic she felt as though he would be a burthen to himself if he lived very long She got cia clothes oil soaked bill feet in mustard water and he slept The i bat was lying on the centre table and I tbe children would come in and get a smell of it and look at each other with reproachful glance and go out and play The man slept and dreamed that a smallpox flag was hung in front of his house and thai he was riding in a butcher wagon to tbe pest boude The wife sent for a doctor and when the man of pills arrived she told him all about the case The doctor picked up the patients new bat tried it on aud got a enifl He eaid the hat was picked before it was ripe Tbe doctor and the wife held a postmortem post-mortem elimination of the bat and found the slice of Litubarger Few and abort were the prayers they said They woke Lie patient and to prepare fan mind for tbo revelation that was about to be made the doctor asked him if his worldly flairs wore in a satisfactory coidition He gasped and said they were The doctor asked him if hu had made his will Ho said that bo had not but tbat he wanted a lawyer tent for at once The doctor a ked him if he felt na though he VS prepared to shuffle 00 The man Bid he had always tried to lead a different lfs and had tried to be done by the same as be would do it himself but that he might have mad a misdeal someway some-way and ho would like to have a minister sent for to take an account of stock Then tbo doctor brought to tbe bedside the hat opened up the sweat leather and showed tbo dying man what it was that tmellod EO and told him that he was as well as any man in i the city The patient pinched himseii to see it tie was alive and jumped out of bed and oiled for his revolver and the doctor couldnt keep up with him down town The last we eaw of the odoriferous citizen ho wag trying to bribe tbe bartender to tell him which ono of these pelicans peli-cans it was that put that slice of cheese in his hat lining Pecks Sun |