Show o 99 iL V Tel T Friends e sn 0 By y EMILE FAGUET M Member of the French Academy j i itT t IW Tf i ik L OM tM aaa dead MM leat e It ft behind J good to pr t in ft friend h M 78 fT and not DOt m Ince oos r I ship a to c r Jl introduce your frier frler Into he h life Iri lri your yur ittle ithe ot of your you details detail troubles and family worries your Intimacy petty pelt enervates friendship quarrels oven kilt kill It To many man y it It and may m bores the friend Is III a person to whom people confide the shortcomings of youris your you rasp may ma the tile friend Is the wife to many man women wanton to whom wham they tile may tell the tile bad habits haMis person perileD of o their husbands it I Is the friends to Ufton Teton duty This Is a mistake and still atilt In time Ume of Is the counsellor whom the Ul friend seed need Ot oak ask for tor advice or whom wit om you wont want to you but for this very reason y you console ole you yeu to abuse him m or em emI m not careful resist must be bo kind looking upon him as s a at him by b K I ras lightning rod red or treat tr t him as King g of ot t the tho ground barber treated On the other side thero there Is no vulgar friend of the Intimacy In telling your of our success or ortho ortho of your family T toys Joys children This Is LI not tho Cho success of your It Is something higher because because tile the question Is la here berc not DOt of ot the tho dally daily dall Ufo life Il Ilof forand for forand forand of the family but tho the goal It strives to and attains I should bo ho surprised hoar hear of a father faber of a family who omitted his wedding anni annl anniversary to invite his friend on given In honor bonor of or or the dinner his hla sons eons graduation from college over overmuch overmuch In reality a 11 wife does not care much for her hor husbands friend In whom husbands love she sho fears tears a rival to her ber and confidences and nothing Is fa more nat natural ural urn Still SUll she docs does not Dot hate bate him her divided feelings toward him are aro rather at the She does door not like him much but same samo time limo she Is LI flattered nattered to know that he ho exists and would feel teel sorry If It ho he did not Your friend by b the very fact of or his existence Is an on approval of or your wit choice of or you Ho no proves prove to her that she sho has bos made no mistake that she has een eon sensible In marrying you that a person may ma love you for a long time Your Tour wife does docs d not no love lov your friend but she ahe would feel Ceel humiliated If It you had no friends friend and feels proud that you nave have one which Is really another way of or liking This sort sorto o or of feeling reeling Is very eO peculiar and we WO really need a now new word wora to express It Thor There Is la another practise practice in fn friendship f an art of ot a very superior kind which however may be In all an social relations relatione Nietzsche says Tho The friend Is It the you must honor the enemy enem in inthe Inthe inthe the friend In your our friend you Ou must see seo your Our best enemy and it Is la when whon you yeu are struggling with him that he is nearest your heart This simply means mean that thit he ba baIs heIs heis Is not worthy worth of ot being called your friend who does not know how to draw you out and sharpen your our abilities by b vigorous opposition It Is III then that bo ho Is the good Jod enemy the tho good adversary you DU need In life lite If the saying be true that you ou can only lean lenn on that which A friend should always uphold you and aDd often onon yet set you right Ho Bo should be your leader as you should be his bis There Thero are friends who remember this too much and who abuso abuse the privilege They lay la down your duty dut to you under all circumstances with Imperturbable self assurance They know without a mo moments ments monts mon s hesitation what you ou should do In Lt Inthe the tho sphere of action and never shrink back from the sacrifices they must Im Impose pose peso upon you It Is persons pomona of or this kind who made a certain humorist say ny 1 I Ido Ido do net want any an friends they are too severe severo In their criticism of the conduct conductor of or others and they tho feel fool too much remorse re morse mono at the tho faults of ot their neighbors This may m bo true but It Is la none nono tho the Teas leas true that a friend may bo a wise wi so counsellor without being either a Mentor Montor MontorOr or a n Tiberge he be may possess a gentle moral persuasion without being this cate cats categorical categorical Imperative which disgusts you even oen If it does docs not make you ou do tho the op of or what bo ho advises I once had a friend ho Is dead now who literally robbed ma mo of a great nazi nm of ot myself for ho he was to a certain ex extent 8 extent tent tont my muse and was WM my con conscience science e No matter what I t wrote and to tc tous tous us literary people ople our writings are of or ac aCt actions lions I always t remembered what he had bad told me and ana allowed myself to be Inspired by It I told myself when writing rot jot we Wit nad mad not the same opinions This Thi will please him Is It then right what I Iam 1 J Jam am t Yes So much the better Or I thought thought This will wUI make mako him Jump Is 10 there perhaps not a reason reas n why it ft Should Irritate him Let me take the tho th sting out eat ef of it to Iu such sueh an 0 extent that what I say will be my thought deprived of or the evil desire dr to make him mad mud and that I will be his hi adversary adry without hurt butt hurtIng buttIng Ing Inc his feelings Th Then a It Is la probable that I shall he be right Title I wrote for reI long tons longtime time having h a which watch was wee as enlightened and amI controlled but still all not dominated by b another anether I still write bone beno non male but always thai I 1 have lout loot Jo t not only som something but Dut some llomo somebody somebody body and I still believe that the mora mem memory ory of or him prevents DIe me e from going gains foolish too far tv and often orton from writing things This Is what Cleere wanted to ex express express press prea when he said sail that friendship can The TUB exist only between good people saying seems strange at first the tb school schoot of ot and to agree more with morals than with teat root life lire In m Wk we wesee between male maio malefactors malefactors see seo strong friendships are at 1001 who factors factora and people virtue It is tat exact ca how bow however strangers to t hnot Is h friendship ever In tho the souse that not Is it when not complete completo except only a of ot that which which Chichi is a n confidence Is practised but a n common effort to and purify each other only feels not Then friendship Its sweetness but Its strong strength th which la Is necessary In order that It may know Its fullness Never has Nietzsche expressed a higher or nobler noble Ider Ide than when ho hOt analyzing analysing with omo tome contempt tho the passions of o love asks himself If It this avidity which one ono feels toward another Is altruism or not rather a n vio violent vIolent Violent lent and fat foi of ot egotism and then bluntly adds Thero Thoro in 18 Ii hero bore and there thero on earth a n kind of ot continuation Uon transportation or of tovo loVO In ID which the tho fervent craving cr which two t o persons feel towards toward each aach other transformed Is Into a now new avidity a n superior thirst felt fait In common for nn An Ideal place above both v But who vho knows itT this love lov Who has baa lived m III n fl m K Kreal real name is t I friendship JIM has attained this Is When friendship Neither height It needs fear real no one distance is able to change It tt time nor and aad Montaigne is Sa right when w he Ite says or oC useful to my m If absence Is Sa pleasant me to me than titan his friend lt it la Is sweeter and aad It is le not Dot really communication there then are ways of or com as aa as a long benefited by lIy cation I have hae separation It widened our ear views our lived and aDd enjoyed enJo ho he saw w life Ho ne H of o if It ItI him as plainly aa ss for forme me and I for tor I had boon been there One ODo part of oC us va woe was wore were together top titer and sep sp separation p Idle when we w made mad the conjunction of or our oar wills lUs richer The Tho Tb insatiable hunger tW ac bespeaks a or aln bodily presence weakness of or the ability to enjoy with your soul And I may add that eVoli evo eternal sep separation arntson painful p thou though ta It ItIs ay Ht r bo be boIs beis since ataee ee it leaves Ives Is half powerless lead behind memory that is h to say y tho soul of ot tho the one ORO who has hag gone on with whom the tho survivor may converse and aad strengthen himself The living may deprive us WI at of their |