| Show TALL TALES As Told to FRANK FRAN E. E HAGAN and andELMO andELMO ELMO ELl SCOTT WATSON 1 Blondy by a Tongue s' s AY Y back In said 1592 said th the theold theold WAY old all I I owned a beautiful racing mare marc whose name was Blondy because of her color My other possession W was 8 a farm but It had n plaster of Bad luck cut between me and the purses although Jim my trainer would get her cream cream-c cream colored lored body In the pink before every race We taught Blondy ondy a lot of at tricks between losing races One was to tomake tomake make maJe a face Jim or ar I would hold an apple or carrot so she had bad to stretch her neck and put out her tongue for Cor It And Anil she got so she would do this whenever we ye told her make a face We entered the mare In a claimIng claimIng claim- claim Ing lag race at Churchill Downs the spring of 02 2 It was May 15 to be exact The mortgage on the farm Carra was due May 16 10 Jim had bad Blondy In great form for the 1 ls mile race But the bookies were were laying 20 to 1 against our nag I scared up a thousand berries and placed the whole roll at at 20 to 1 It was win the race or lose the farm The horses were away evenly enly but yards from the start Blondy stumbled and lost stride Then she winged away regaining lost ground at every jump Then Thea a horse cut cutIn cutIn cutin In front of r her It was Dixie Dude and she had to be pulled Down the back stretch and around the turn they came Blondy was moving up on the outside When the they hit bit the stretch she and Dixie Dude were running head and head It looked like a certain dead heat hent but at the last Jump or two Jim hanging on the rail yelled Make a face Yo To Blondy I l Make a face facet l I Thank God f Blondy heard straightened her neck shot out her tongue across the finish line Une and won the race Man-Made Man Mesas FTER Paul Bun Bunyan nn finished his A AFTER work logging off ocr the Pacific Northwest he decided hed he'd become an oil oll First thing tiling he did was to go down Into New Mexico and begin drilling a well on top of a mountain which was made up of at alternate layers of thin rock ant and dry sand One night a windstorm came up And how she did blow I The next morning when Paul woke up he looked out of the window of ot his shack and such a sight as met his eyes I There was his hole standing straight up In n the air ar as high as he could see The wind had blown all the sandy layers away from It but the la layers ers of at rock were hangIng banging around It like e washers pushed around a Q drill stem tem Paul was Vas pretty mad about It but buthe buthe he be didn't waste any time standing around cussing He just took a sledge and climbed up to the top He fie began pounding the hole down Into the ground again As he did so the thela la layers ers of at rock began to come together together together to to- gether and made a mesa That sort of thing happened time after time and that's why New Mexico MexIco Mexico Mex Mex- ico Is so full of mesas They're perpetual perpetual perpetual per per- monuments to Paul Bunyan's unsuccessful oil drilling operations there The Squalling S SOME O OME IE cold winter night as you sit before a roaring fire In a hunting lodge or In the bunkhouse of at a lumber camp In the North NorthWoods' NorthWoods NorthWoods' NorthWoods NorthWoods' NorthWoods Woods' Woods youre you're- certain to hear outsIde outside outside out out- side a Iong out long out drawn moaning You might think Its It's the wind In the bare branches of the trees but Its It's a mourning because It has hasa a warty Ill fitting skin That's all a ever does does does- Just goes wandering among the hemlock trees weeping and sobbing bitterly because Its skin doesn't fit When the thermometer Is Js down to nine degrees above zero you can follow It by the little globules atIce of at Ice It leaves behind the behInd the trail of at Cr frozen zen tears Because It Is such a shy nocturnal nocturnal nocturnal nal animal few men have ever seen seena a But nut once a lumberjack by Imitating its cries lured one Into his cabin When he shut the little beast up In a wicker basket It began began be be- gan to sob and moan This went on for Cor hours then dIed dice down The lumberjack peeked Into the basket to see sec If the had cried Itself to sleep But all he found was salt water and a few tew bubbles The had bad dissolved itself In Its own tears I known better said the lumberjack as he added one of at his own tears to the tho collection t than Jan to have shut him hint up In a basket made from branches of or willow a weeping tree 0 f Western Newspaper Union |
