OCR Text |
Show SOUTHERN UTAH NEWS School WEDNESDAY JUNE 4, 2003 Ol Crankcase - When did the clown die? Anonymous and overeat. HowBy Chick Nielsen, Dixie State College East ever, you make a great cup, Dave. Bob Wells told me the other Is Lawrence Reese cheap? Well, last Christmas Eve he shot day. I must be getting old! I off three blanks and told his cant turn the TV off or my wife grandkids that Santa had com- on. Everythings starting to mitted suicide. The I.R.S. better click for Bob, his elbows, his watch hi m. He deducts for chari- neck, his knees . . . Rose told him table donations to the widow of just last week, No, you old fool, the unknown soldier. The other you cant buy a car with a runday he became very angry be- ning board! Bob, when faced cause he got well before the with temptations, chooses the medicine he bought was gone. one that will get him home by How do I know all this? I got it nine. Youre OK, Bob, just a little senile. from Rod Lathim. Then theres Doug McF adden! As a child Cleve Bushnells When he goes out into the woods parents adored him. When he was five they gave him a hand- hunting, he takes along a couple ful of green on St. Patricks Day. bottles of the good stuff in case of Cleve thought it was a bunch of snakebite. Then to be sure he four-leaclovers. Turns out it gets bitten, he takes along a f was poison ivy. Cleves mother couple of snakes. My boy, Doug, once said, I love children! I aint dumb! Doug pretends to be a health would have given anything to enthusiast. have had one. Cleve was a preEvefy morning, he cocious child, however. By the time he was two months old, he was already eating solids . . . crayons, paper, pencils, erasers, rocks . . . The Ronald McDonald House Royce Gillespie said to Jim has established a new scholarOtt the other day, Those are ship in partnership with the nice clothes youre wearing. of Utah. Only 10 University When did the clown die? They fit scholarships of varying you well, too. What size are they, amounts are offered for the 62 baggy? Keep talking like entire state. that, Royce, and theyll be operJD Davis, the program adating on your other knee. ministrator for Utah, said, We Wanta know why Dave Nash are excited to have Sammy in is so rotten? His family Bible our inaugural program. The had only four commandments entire committee was imand three of those were just repressed with him. He is one of quests. His middle name must our top two scholars, so he will be theory because he never also get housing, books and works. Dumb? He thinks bubblefees. gum cards are part of the Great Books series. Hes the kind of guy who would go to Overeaters goes out jogging. I wont say hes lousy at it, but yesterday, Doug Crosby arrested him for loitering. And his wife, Jo? The other day she went whistling through Fredonia at the speed of light. Mark Gilberg, standing alongside his cruiser, took out his whistle and blew it frantically as she sped by. She paid him no Geoff D. Campbell, son of Cecil and Robin Campbell, received nal justice honor society and the heed. Mark jumped in his car and chased her down after Mach 3 speeds were registered. RunMark ning up to her screamed, Lady! Didnt you hear my whistle?! Said Jo, very coyly, Officer, when Im driving, I dont flirt. Throw the book at her, Mark. Come see 01 Crankcase about fall semester classes. Dont know 01 Crankcase? Hes the one, who when he dies, the Wicked Witch will look for a used box. jet-mobil- e, Samuel Garcia wins first Ronald McDonald House Scholarship Valley students growing Spring has sprung. The Valley Elementary students celebrated their ownership in the school grounds in preparation for summer. Each grade had the opportunity to plant a tree and tenderly plant a time capsule filled with memories from their school days among the roots of the tree. The upper grades played in the dirt as they framed the building with marigolds and sunflowers. Then the work began as they all took part in picking up garbage on the playground, pulling weeds, raking the sawdust under the play equipment and doing all kinds of p activities. This day is one that all the children will remember when they see how nice the school looks this summer. fix-u- Digital technology After care program Satisfaction guaranteed insurance Disability insurance Life Annuities, IRAs his Bachelors Degree in Criminal Justice from Southern Utah University on Saturday, May 3, 2003. Geoffis married to Kristin J. Campbell (Ford), and they have three children - Tyrus, J.oshua and Bailey. Geoff was a member of Alpha Phi Sigma, the national crimi- - Barbara Marshall r 251 Located at 75 East 200 South Every 2nd Thursday Call today for an appointment tain a cumulative grade point average of 3.0 and a grade point average of 3.2 or higher in their criminal justice major or minor. Geoff was also ranked in the upper 35 percent of his class. Geoff and his family are planning to move to Las Vegas. $2 ICE ZVpk ATTe IBS N. Kanab, (435) 691-426- 84741 2 tim.croteaunmfn.com FINANCIAL NETWORK Hearing aids do not restore natural hearing. Individual experiences vary depending on severity of hearing loss, accuracy of evaluation, proper fit, and ability to adapt to amplification. kHtCfren under n www.nmfn.comsouthernutahgroup Northwestern Mutual 02003 The Northwestern Mutual Lie Ineurance Co , MMweuhee, Wl 3004-11- treatment 1 hour) o House Calls o Family Care 200 E. UT for exam and (treatments are 30 min to Tim Croteau Financial Representative Independently Owned S Operated Kane County Eye Clinic local chapters of Beta Lamda. Members are required to main- $30 Audiologist XX Samuel is Kanab High Schools Valedictorian this year. He has also been involved in sports and activities in the school and the community. Sammy has a clear sense of his course in life. He sets high standards for himself and doesnt deviate from them. These qualities combined with his quiet modesty have won the admiration and respect of the student body, faculty and staff of Kanab High School. Chiropractic Care In Your Own Home MS-CC- C Miracle-Ea- a mentor program on campus. Campbell receives Bachelors Degree in Criminal Justice Expert guidance and innovative solutions to help you reach your financial goals. Are You There Yet? Nationwide service network Service all makes of hearing aids As part of the scholarship program, he will be involved in treatedforfree) 24 hrs emergency care Office: Cell: 644-627-2 899-18- 89 email: drmikekanab.net www. mbschiro. com |