Page A2 THE DAILY HERALD, Provo, Utah, Friday, September 24. 1999 Wailing, gnashing of teeth came to pass in 'Y2K B.C.' (From the Babylon Daily Herald, Sept. 24, 2001 RC) 3000 B.C., many of these beasts were not even yet creat- Panic spreadeth wide over this city as the hearts of men turn toward the time, which rapidly approacheth, when the year shall change from 2001 even unto 2000 or "Y2K B.C.," as it hath been named. "We knowcth not what sort of havoc shall be wreaked when all three numbers which cometh after the 2 shall all become at once zeroes," saith Nomrom, a learned man. "Yea, verily, it freaketh us out." It is feared, saith many learned men, that the devices and artifices which man now useth with frequency and felicity, such as the plowing- mechanism and the earthen-warshall pottery-jug- , become without use when arriveth the year Y2K B.C. Perhaps beasts, thinking it is once again 3000 B.C., shall cease to pull their yea, for indeed, in "When made we our tools, we took not into account the many zeroes which would soon befall us," saith Glepach, a maker of tools and a man of great stature, yea, of considerable magnitude, most especially in his hind quarters, great portions of which can bs 6een as his lower garment is girt too low about his body, yea, even UROF CHALDEES beast-drive- n - e plowing-mechanism- s; ed. revealing his hind quarters and the mighty crack thereof. "Yea, verily, our minds were much too caught up in fleeing ravenous beasts and tending to fathers and our children to concern ourselves with such mat500-year-o- ters." "We kicketh ourselves now," addeth Glepach, quenching his thirst with fermented ale, though it be but 9 in the morning-time. Noted tithe-collect- Melchizedek feareth much con- - women's team. One of Miller's assistants at Duluth, which is Continued from Al fielding a women's hockey team for the first time this fans a taste of what Olympic year, is Manon Rheaume, the women's hockey is all about. It first woman to in the features the University of National Hockey play League. Minnesota Duluth and the Tickets are $5 each, or $4 University of Calgary Oval per person for groups of five exhibiXtreme in a or more. The reasonable price tion. is on purpose. Between them, the two we're "Basically, only teams include nine Olympians to pay to enough charging from the 1998 Games in bring the teams in here," said Nagano. DeLaMare-SchafeMary But hockey is only one of director of and the many events included in Government Community Relations for the celebration. Provo City. "We wanted to First up, on Wednesday, will keep the ticket prices down so 2)e the Grand Opening Gala. people would have a chance to The gala will include a come. ihort ceremony beginning at "Lots of won't be i:30 p.m. that will feature able to affordpeople Olympic tickets, fireworks, the lighting of the so, through this event, we will 301 ympic rings, demonstragive them a chance to enjoy tions of different ice sports Olympic-calibe- r women's Jigure skating, hockey, curl- hockey at a very low price." and free ing, speed skating Hockey won't be the only public skating at the two action on The Peaks' ice that rinks. weekend. The Grand Opening Gala is The Timpanogos Figure free, but tickets are required. Club will present its Skating Free tickets are available at club show on Oct. 1 (6 first the Provo City Parks and and Oct. 2 (8:30 p.m.), Recreation Department (351 p.m.) with more that 50 local W. Center), any branch of Far skaters performing. West Bank or Bank of The show, "Hurray for American Fork, or at The includes skaters Peaks Arena (100 N. Seven Hollywood," 3 as young as years old on up Peaks Blvd). to adults, from beginners On Oct. (Friday and through those who have been Saturday), both ice hockey training seriously in the sport and figure skating will be on for several years. Music will display. be from Hollywood staples The Challenge games will such as "The Sound of Music," take place at 8 p.m. on Oct. 1 "Star Wars" and "Grease." and at 2 p.m. on Oct. 2 in the And who knows what main rink at The Peaks. future Olympians might be on Jenny Schmidgall, a mem- the ice? Just six years before ber of the 1998 Olympic gold she won the 1995 U.S. title U.S. women's and a bronze medal at the will play, along world championships, Nicole hockey team, with members of Canada's silBobek was a cowgirl with a team ver hat and blonde pigStacy Wilson, Leslie Reddon, tails in a club show in Diduck, Hayley Colorado. In the Judy Wickenheiser and Danielle 1988 Olympic gold medalist Brian Boitano was Ernie (of Goyett. There's lots of talent, expeSesame Street's Bert and rience and history on the Ernie) in his local club show in California. coaching end, as well. So keep an eye on the tiny Minnesota Duluth coach Shannon Miller is the former Dalmatians, the "Footloose" s head coach of the Canadian and other perform- - Eric D. Snider fusion shall result at the dawn of a millennium new. "What, shall men cease paying 10 percent in tithes and begin to pay 1 percent?" Melchizedek saith in a rhetorical manner. "The paperwork alone boggleth the mind and maketh me in need of sleep." Many men fear that scrolls bearing record of their 10 wives shall wrongfully indicate each man possessing only one wife. What shall befall the concubines remaineth unclear. ONE THING remaineth certain: No great flood shall over- take the earth, as that hath been done once already, removing from the world all manner of wickedness and unicorns. Saith great prophet Noah, father of us all, patriarch to mankind, from his rest home in Florida, "The Great Flood: Now behold, THERE thou hast a calamity. This Y2K thing paieth in comparison. Where's my soup?" AND LO, not many years following the flood, in the days of Peleg, the earth becameth dividedeth. Saith Peleg, "Behold, the scriptures saith it happened in the days of Peleg.' It saith not that it was Peieg's fault. Why dost everyone accuse me that I didst it? Leavest thou me alone." Then Peleg shutteth his door. And lo, who forgetteth, not two-gam- e : i I l ' ) . Eric - othej-male- D. Snider can be at ericericdsnider.com. - ' ' FIGHT Provo Police responded at about 9:30 p.m. Thursday to 333 S. 600 East, Provo, in front of Auto Zone-t-e break up a confrontation between four individuals. A man trying to retrieve some allegedly stolen property from a female, was confronted by two of the woman's friends armed with baseball fig? A ats. Approximate 20 people were trapped in an elevator for about 20 minutes that got stuck between the fourth and fifth floors at c Utah Valley Regional Medical Center. about 8:45 p.m. on Thursday. The elev tor only provides service between Vnose. two floors. It is not known what caused, J the stoppage and the elevator was taken out of service until technicians could look at it today. Ay BACK INJURY .'t Mural In watting: Artist Russell Anderson paints a mural Friday resembling a skate pro shop that built at the Peaks Ice Arena in Provo. What: Grand Opening Gala When: Wednesday, 6:30 p.m. Where: The Peaks Ice Area (100 N. Seven Peaks Blvd.; Provo) Tickets: Free, but necessary to attend Where to get tickets: Provo City Parks and Recreation Department (351 W. Center); Utah County branches of Far West Bank and Bank of American Fork; The Peaks Ice Arena his daily trek through the mountains stumbled across several fields of marijuana plants, leading authorities to what could be the biggest drug bust in Utah state history. Local and federal agents found an estimated 10,000 plants, worth more than $1 million, after the hiker spotted an armed guard around 9 a.m. Wednesday, noticed the plants and called police, said Weber County Sheriffs Capt. Terry Shaw. continued Authorities mountain the rugged searching area near the North Ogden Divide for more plants on Thursday. Authorities believe the U.S. Forest service owns some of the land. Two men were taken into custody Thursday afternoon as possible suspects in the mari- What: International Collegiate Women's Hockey Challenge Who: University of Minnesota Duluth vs. Calgary Oval Xtreme When: Oct. 1, 8 p.m., Oct. 2, 2 p.m. Where: The Peaks Ice Arena (100 N. Seven Peaks Blvd., Provo) Tickets: $5 per person or $4 per person for groups of five or more Where to get tickets: Provo City Parks and Recreation Department (351 W. Center); Utah County branches of Far West Bank and Bank of American Fork; The Peaks Ice Arena. suspects was released, and authorities were still looking for more people who may have been involved. Shaw said the hiker, whose name was not released, looked up during his walk to find a pacing man in the distance, but didn't think anything was wrong until he noticed the man rifle. had a "The hiker probably wouldn't have noticed the marijuana if the guy hadn't had a gun," Shaw said. Within an hour, agents from the Ogden Metro SWAT Team (and the Weber Morgan Narcotics Strike Force moved in for an initial search of the area. The Drug Enforcement d ing near Springville High School some- time Thursday afternoon or early evening. Police are investigating the incH dent and would not release any other information at this time. What: Hurray for Hollywood, Timpanogos Figure Skating Club Show Who: Local skaters, beginners to expert When: Oct. 1, 6 p.m. Oct. 2, 8:30 p.m. Where: The Peaks Ice Arena (100 N. Seven Peaks Blvd., Provo) Tickets: $4 per person, or $3 per person for groups of five or more Where to get tickets: Provo City Parks and Recreation Department (351 W. Center); Utah County branches of Far West Bank and Bank of American Fork; The Peaks Ice Arena. Cbnfitd UvtrtUif RtOtAdwrtttlt SabKriptkm ui ddhny Kn&t Nmroon For Dqnrtnntt Mt btcd iban fax J7344SI S J75-51J44-25- 4 J73-M- 5 susm JdMkaiUatnuMa 1-- USPS PuMnhcd (ISSN: mornings, Sunday through Saturday, by Pulitzer Community Newspapers, Inc., 1565 North Freedom Boulevard, Provo, Utah 84604. Periodicals postage paid at Provo, Utah. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to: The Daily Herald, P.O. Box 717. Provo, Utah 84603-071- NEWSSTAND he or she ers in this show may go on to become a champion. Regardless of the future, there will be plenty of energy and action at the show both nights. Tickets are $4 per person, Agency also joined the effort. Besides the plants, agents juana operation, the Weber County Sheriffs Office said. No found a campsite with an elabother information about the orate irrigation system, drying high-powere- ly A female approximate, STABBING 16 years old was stabbed while walk EstabHihed August 1, 1873. Hiker puts lid on pot operation A hiker on P be s, teen-ager- LIBERTY (AP) will t g mid-1970- A female injured her back during cheer-,I- ( leading practice at Leni Hign school at about 8 p.m. Thursday. The cheerlead ers were forming a pyramid when the gi wrenched her back, when Utah County Sheriff's dispatch received the call, the J girl was complaining of tingling in her tower legs. The paramedics who ' responded did not think the injury was serious, however, she was transported '9 to American Fork Hospital to be checkgf . by a physician. 1 medal-winnin- g medal-winnin- .fJ. STUCK ELEVATOR r, 2 s ?A f r ' f After talking to the girl aftS investigators began seeking Marin. Edwards said police had an idea Marin was their adult suspect. But police were not able to get his full name from the suspect or who were at the Oren house where the incident allegedly occurred. The girl told police she andi male friend (who not a suspect) had been waging along University Avenue near Bulldog Avenue in Proyp Monday when a man drove jy in a blue van and invited the for a ride. The girl told police she gjjt into the van with her frien, but felt uncomfortable about.k. After driving around for 45 minutes, the three ended upJ the Orem home of the rape suspect, the girl saj. She also told police seveij people in the house wherf using alcohol and marijuana. Edwards said the victijqj identified a photo of Marfli from a photo line-u- first suspect, 4 f i ' back." resulted in many unknown and strange tongues being spoke by the earth's inhabitants, yea, even Chinese and Utahn? Behold, it appeareth that these great events leadeth up to one massive destruction which shall surely come with Y2K B.C. So what great calamity awaits us? "There remaineth fire," saith theologian and learned man Plechech. "Fire hath not been used extensively, nor hath we seen much of poisonous serpents. Perhaps Y2K B.C. shall bring upon us one of these dread catastrophes, or perhaps a combination thereof, wherein poisonous serpents which are on fire fall from the heavens." All the earth's inhabitants are urged to fear and tremble, repent, and gather up much reached via i;; . Continued from A 1 food storage. many years after Peleg divideth the earth, the great tower which was built which PEAKS i . ARREST racks and weapons, including a caliber rifle, a shotgun and a box of ammunition. "This has got to be one of the biggest drug operation busts we've been involved in for an awfully long time," said Weber County Sheriffs Chief Deputy .30-.3- 0 A.K. Greenwood. Using helicopter and ground searches, agents discovered at least six separate patches of marijuana with between "several hundred and several thousand plants," Shaw said. The plants were apparently being cultivated and processed on site. This is not exactly something you see every day around here," Shaw said. or $3 per person for groups of branch of Far West Bank or five or more. Bank of American Fork in Tickets for the hockey Utah County or The Peaks game and figure skating arena. show are available at the same locations that will have Daily Herald staff writer the free Gala tickets: The Josephine Zimmerman conProvo Recreation office, any tributed to this story. SUBWAY Continued from Al "With the help of a male customer in the Subway Sandwich Shop who came to Officer Christensen's aid, (the until adult) was subdued officers ' arrived," other Edwards said, adding that Christensen injured his left shoulder during the fight and also suffered scrapes and bruises. Christensen went on his own to seek medical attention Thursday morning. Edwards said the adult's bag contained three separate packages of psilocybin (a hallucinogenic drug obtained from Mexican mushrooms). Arrested in the incident was Christopher S. Helm, 19, of 841 W. 830 North, Orem, who Edwards identified as the adult who ran. In addition to Helm, Edwards said Dylan Bullock, 18, of Highland; a American Fork juvenile; and a Orem juvenile were also arrested. Helm was charged with resisting arrest, tampering with evidence, possession of a controlled substance with the intent to sell, assault of a police officer and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. Edwards said marijuana and the illegal mushrooms were confiscated along with a set of finger scales, nearly $900 and two cell phones. Bullock was arrested for possession of illegal drugs with the intent to distribute and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. Edwards said the juveniles were arrested for distribution of a controlled substance. Adults were taken to the Utah County Jail, and the juveniles to the youth detention PRICE Daily Weekdays and Saturday Sunday . $.50 $1.50 SUBSCRIPTION RATES period Daily and Sunday Mail, in U.S.A. One Year Daily and Sunday ) Mail, in U.S.A. (m Sunday only(UT, ID, WY) other Sunday only(AII states) Seven days (UT, ID, WY) Seven days (All other states) )) $9.00 .$13.00 .SW.0O $130.00 $143.00 $182.00 $227.50 Guaranteed delivery: Your newspaper should arrive by 6:30 a.m. If you do not receive your paper, please call by 9:00 a.m, weekdays and 10 aja on weekends. Delivery it guaranteed. 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