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Show PAGE 25 THE ZEPHYRDECEMBER 89 a The looks on their polite little faces turned rapidly from helplessness to sheer panic as they bounced along, cameras flopping. About the time I'd reconciled myself of being accused of causing an International Inddently by NkslngN five Japanese teenagers, around the corner came good old Monte with his group, and my girls' horses Just trotted Into line with his and resumed their customary trudge. Once the girls had started to breathe again, they began jabbering Whewl animatedly with their companions about their adventure. I think I'm real glad I couldn't understand a word they saldl To make a long story short, this scenario was repeated twice more, with subtle variations, until wed finally gotten every one of those kids on horseback at least once, some twice. What was supposed to take an hour and a half wound up taking almost five. Their bus was just pulling out of the driveway at 9:30 as Monte, Uz and I staggered up to the lodge looking for the management to buy us dinner. We also planned to hit them up for hazardous-dut- y pay, which wasn't very likely, but asking for It would at least give us a personal sense of satisfaction. Now don't get the Impression that teenagers are the only ones that give us the heebie-jeebi- es. wrangler-typ- es We've had near misses with people from 1 to 80, like the time Monte and I took a big bunch up Courthouse Wash Into Arches. We'd put a rather portly mom and her 18 month old son on one of our stouter horses. Yes folks, our motto at Pick Crick Is Its never too soon to start em! Anyway, this kid had a pacifier stickln out of his face (why people plug those things Into their babies Is beyond me!) which he periodically spit out Into the sand. This, of course, caused us to stop the whole parade so one of us could dismount, root around among the million hooves til we'd found It, dusted the blasted thing off and plugged It back in the squalling Infant's face. About the fifth or sixth time this happened, Monte retrieved the pacifier, stuck It In his shirt pocket and told Junior, "You can have this back when we get back to the trailer." Mama looked horrified, but baby only walled for about 30 seconds before he quit and settled down to enjoy the ride. (Sometimes I think the guys who market pacifiers are the Souffle cat food to overweight cat owners.) same ones who sell Salmon-Cavi- ar Then there was the time I had a family of six; Mom, Dad and four kids, on a ride on one of the steep narrow ridges above the ranch. I'd put the smallest kid, about five, on old Paco, right behind me so I could keep an eye on him. A mile or so from home we came to a fork In the trail that was a shortcut back to the ranch. Well, Paco, knowing the kid wasn't going to tell him any different, hung a sharp left and started back past the line, headed for the barn. The first person he passed was Dad who, thinking to rescue his son, grabbed Paco's bridle right behind the ears and proceeded to yank It right off Paco's head. The wily old pony, knowing he was free, broke Into a shuffling trot for home, leaving Dad with the bridle dangling uselessly In his hand. By this time Mama was screaming, "Now look what you've done, George!" The rest of the horses, seeing how neatly Paco had liberated himself, began trying to turn around to follow him down this ch wide trail. This produced much screaming and thrashing amongst the rest of the kids, and things got pretty "Western" for awhile there as I lurched and crashed through the brush to head Paco off. I managed to get him stopped and so I could lead him the rest of the way. The kid was none for the worse for wear, from Mama all the way home. but poor Dad suffered a severe tongue-lashi- ng I'm sure there are people out there who Imagine that dude punching must be boring. But let me tell you I dont know of anything that can get your adrenaline pumping so quick, not to mention how It keeps your reflexes sharp and your ulcers thriving. So, this winter Im headed south where I can relax and let my shattered nerves recover. Yeah, I got me a Job wrasslln' alligators In Florida. 12-In- re-brl- dled Rancher, wrangler Ronnie Egan now lives In New Mexico. 59 S. 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