Show jiR4D THE CAMEL TIlE SOLDIER Why the Two Cannot oge11t Reasons Get Along Together astounding items of in the mong hich come all the way from formation to this country by cable is the Iou d an that the British infantry taten1C11t the tateD1e nt AbuKleaare Gubat upon rtiriflg frOm U walking to camel fOl and prefer fni an cbeerfil c heer information is not surprising This S Tommy Atkins who nannino Takc a genUtflC anything neer been > across any llng b bly haS donkey on Hemp but a liighiy4am put him I outside the and Icatl1 flfl FtC3d II ea camel and he will hump of f n hel1thY the words of the cable 11ndoubtC1lY echo Iking to came I rl d miie 1 p refers in camel C is no joyousness There ing < there is much contrary riding nn the the sophisticated The suffering oIn poetical individual Camel by some ship Of the desert i tne dubbert been u the builder most e case cuhlr C In thcit particular bniIdCl better than he knew decided Unll on a camel WIll not give I of courseJf but it is only be I anybodY seasickflCSS bscnce of the sea All the I cause of tu ntsllececcar J to maldcmer I other e 1uu1tS 5ne1ridi1g The exer prCSCh1t in S3 but are Cbe cxercitlnt physICally use may l be Snccg the calm which is It scarcelY to prodflCC sleep upon the pool off of-f Uppoe B Thfproccss of riding a 1 camel produces The procc and sundry vexations even for 0 OtlS equestrians In the first place SUiimistbe compelled to lie down i K prorided with a peg in his nose the iattached to a string and when they the-y is pulled he is supposed to go dad 5tI1g uJlon his bended knees He does down however without a protest On Tot the go contrary he snarls in sounds that be heard a mile off if there is anybody any-body dn within biteable distance he will is anybody objectionable bite and if there I able to him within reach of his gaunt sprawly hindlegs he will kick out with m earnestness worthy of a 1 better cause The bite of Mr Caml is nothing to be trifled with His jaws have a horizontal i action working from side to side and the lower maxilury churns above the upper nmiliary with a 1 grit and a grind that would make any person with delicate deli-cate nerves shiver with the devotion of an aspen to its peculiar business of driveling Not once nor twice but often has the camel lifted off at one fell bite the cranium of some Arab or Hindoo who had reposed so much confidence in his good intentions as to stand beneath his nostrils and smoke villainously strong tobacco As for the kick of the camel it is what might be described in a 1 certain vernacular vernacu-lar as a holy terror As farreaching as a sheriffs warrant it has at the same time the force of a Krupp cannon When an excited billiardist whirls around a cue with which to annihilate the man who has just beaten him the cue resembles the camels kicking leg It gyrates it reems to flash and then it floors most absolutely In Arabia there is a 1 legend that the camel of the Prophet lifted one of its legs with such effect that a wicked gentleman was summarily imbedded in a rock exactly five miles away from the spot where the camel performed his salutatory sal-utatory feat Whether or not the camel knows his powers his kicking possibilities J possibili-ties are greater than those of a politician and decidedly more elevating than a 1 Presidential election achieved by the exercises ex-ercises oi hotandcold mugwumps His kick has a farreaching corkscrewical effect which is difficult to describe With its oldfashioned sponge foot a camel can knock even the cheek off a Ninth Ward I politician for even triple brass cannot avail against its intensity of application There is one thing pleasant about the camel That is the lustre of its eye Juno was called the oxeyed from the rich resemblance of her eyes to those of a placid cow but richer in subdued lustre than the eyes of the ox or the gazelle is the eye of the camel Nevertheless it is I the kind of wicked optic described by Longfellow and plainly hangs out the signal of H beware Gazing into the eve of a camel is like looking down into I the depths of a clear well dark glittering I I glitter-ing profound and containing a 1 light wh gradually fades away into ineffa I I ie edarkbrowri shadows Nevertheless I romance is taken out of the beautiful mSi eye of the camel by the knowledge that there skulks beneath it a bite of terrible ter-rible proportions and behind it a kick that would seem to make dynamite a 1 superfluous luxury of civilization As for the ship of the desert being all that fancy paints it the experience of Tommy Atkins in the Soudan expresses about the truth ofthe matter First a I rock forward then a 1 jolt backward and I suddenly catch up in the middle which makes the vertebrae quiver like blancmange I blanc-mange in the hands of a careless waiter are lust about the general characteristics of camel riding Attached to all this I there are pains which to use the singularly I singu-larly expressive language of the cables permitted to be disseminated by Gen I Lord Wolseley made the British troops prefer walking to camel riding An inexperienced mahout upon the neck of a jungle elephant in the ravines of Jvmchunjunga could not possibly he amore 1 a-more deplorable wreck of humanity than an English infantry soldier perched with an his accoutrements upon the back of a outlan camel To him an equinoctial storm m the Mediterranean would in comparison be a pleasurable experience lie ould i probably prefer an earthquake n volcano a thunderbolt or anything else at Would Suddenly put him out of Hex ierye toment In short the camel is a 1 P iery much overrated animal He is a 1 icious Pimle a ruinbler and misanthropically a S lu S sole virtues lie in padded feet of caPacious stomach suspendable power lficatIon ttlio0 < hylificntion and deglu ariuVe af a famIlIarity with the peculi Heneg it the trackless ways of the desert Lord WIS easy to understand General W e s intimation world that thco eieys to the camel rid Gubat troops Prefer marching to riding reals ng Indeed it probably con FUffer particulars about unnumbered pains y the call1el1 yt unsophisticated British the i n their retreat from Gubat to I COncentrating Trilune point at Abu Klea I |