Show MATRIMONY Marriage lu America Has Higher BOSIS Than in Europe However much is believed and published damaging to our reputation for social de cency and high morality I have a most fixed and unchanging conviction that we are the cleanest sweetest and holiest ixjople socially on the face of the earth It would be no more than the truth to say that this social purity is one of the results I of our social customs Our young people arc me ireesc ana happiest of the worlds youth Our boys and girls are thrown together more in school in society and in public places than the youth of any other country and the matter ol sex is llIS considered in their amusements and ic creations Growing out of the free life of our young people is the immensely im port Ult fact that marriage in America esiMJciallyamong the middle classes has a holier basis and motive than is certain ly the case in any country of Europe The lowest classes of Germany marry very generally and with but little regard to the advantages and outcome of wed lock but simply because it is the custom and because it is convenient and desirable i to have their own homes j The French i are a thrifty people and thrift is an ele seldom ment entering leap into into matrimony all they do Indeed They II I among all classes even to some extent I the among peasantry marriage is a matter for arrangement the parents for the most part making the matches Society in England is one of castes and classes What I applies to one caste or I class does not apply to the other castes or classes For instance the lower and I artisan classes are the most improvident I j of all working people of whom I know I anything when in England no aspect I of its social life is so everpresent to me as the unthriftiness of the woiking people I They marry and are given in marriage as j though it were only a matter of a days to them born I lark They have children I I without the least regard to number or I mU ofVl i rir ns1v to the I Mnnn Thou SUCK icn > < j > LV LU < > provision lucy reugIUU1JY I creed that God makes the children and that he will not send a mouth without food to fill it The poorest couples seem to hike pride in multiplying their offspring off-spring and replenishing the earth The I average family of a workingman I should say would be about eight children I speak from observation and not as giving I statistics These children are usually as well taken care of as the means of their parents will justify They begin to work in their tender years and become breadwinners bread-winners and out in the world on their own account while yet the children of all American working people are in school The great body of this class of English I children are very independent and early form their own associations and rush into matrimonial engagements and alliances with but little concern as to the future or the fitness of things The middle classes of England do not quite go to the opposite extreme but considerations con-siderations enter into the matter of marriage mar-riage that we in this country would at least affect to deem most unworthy and mischievous Whatever else we may consider in forming matrimonial relations we always put forth but one supreme motive We hold it to be the only true and enduring form of marriage that no other element should largely enter into the motive on either side It we think otherwise than this we never give articulation articu-lation to our thoughts But this does not hold true in England Love may be taken for granted Perhaps it usually is But it is not a matter that is discussed either between the contracting contract-ing parties themselves or their friends Much is said and openly said about the families and the relations the capacities of the man for getting on in the world and the amiableand housewifely qualities of the woman It may be a matter of I love and I should say that it is univer allv held that it ought to be a matter of I love but all the same marriage with the middle and upper classes of England is also a matter of business Courtships in England are short and engagements are long No sooner is it understood that a young man and a young woman are in love than it is given out they are engaged The American custom of leaving young men and young women free to associate together and to keep company with each other for an indefinite length of time without declaring their intentions in-tentions is almost unknown in any country coun-try of Europe It is not long after a young man begins to show the daughter attentions atten-tions before the father gives intimation that he wishes to know what it means and either the youth declares his intentions inten-tions or is notified to cut sticks Whatever What-ever the advantages of the English view of this matter may have it has at least one most obvious disadvantage and that II is it leads to engagements upon too short an acquaintance and it makes of the engagement en-gagement the courting time rather than as a mere preparation for marriage When once engaged theyoungpeople are thrown together in the freest of fashion and may be left to themselves at all times and in all places almost as though they were man and wife In the general society of America marriage is deemed the vitallv important event in this life hut in Eng lish l society the engagement is looked upon as the most important and really is a sort of first stage in matrimony or the personal uniting of the lives only awaiting the legal ceremony Robert Laine Collier Col-lier |