Show Quest to heal leads abuse victim to face demons I I Caryle Murphy The Post PostOn On a balmy spring of day last week Michael Donovan drove his rented car slowly past Holy Name School where a billboard billboard billboard bill bill- board read He who angers you controls you The year old Vietnam veteran veteran veteran vet vet- eran and retired businessman from California was on a mission mission mission mis mis- sion into his past a mission to tobar bar banish sh his own anger and regain control A mission of healing Almost 50 years ago during Donovans Donovan's grade eighth-grade spring la bie br c he was was sexually abused b s d a r Holy Name by Thomas Schaefer then 30 a newly minted minted minted mint mint- ed Roman Catholic priest Schaefer went on to molest at least 20 more boys in the Washington Archdiocese according to church officials before pleading guilty in 1995 in five of those cases Only one other priest in the archdiocese Robert Petrella had more known victims officials said About 25 people have reported being molested by Petrella The two priests were responsible for more than a third of the reports of sexual abuse by clergy in the archdioceses archdiocese's year 59 his his- tory For decades Donovan kept quiet about his traumatic experience ence confiding only in his current current current cur cur- rent wife But in 2003 determined determined determined deter deter- mined to be counted in a national nation nation- al survey of the churchs church's abuse problem he informed the archdiocese archdiocese archdiocese arch arch- diocese of Schaefer's Schaefer s 's 1956 misconduct mis mis- conduct He learned then that he was Schaefer's Schaefer s 's earliest known victim It took me 47 years to raise my hand Donovan said These are things that get buried in peo pl ut they don't dont Jorge wit it it- it Donovan who served with the Airborne in Vietnam recalled that the priests who took his initial calls apologized immediately which was really heartfelt by me Nobody had ever apologized to me for what happened He decided that he needed to todo todo todo do two things to face the dragon drag drag- on I need to face meet with Schaefer and visit the room at athis athis athis his old school where the abuse occurred Psychologists and victims' victims advocates say it is common for survivors of child sexual abuse to want to meet their abusers partly because the power once less child becomes the empowered empowered empowered ered adult controlling the encounter At least half of child abuse victims want to physically see or visit with the offender said Gary a Minneapolis psychologist whose clinic has treated more than people abused by professionals including including including ing teachers doctors psychiatrists psychiatrists psychiatrists psychia psychia- and clergy They feel that any y kin land kind clarity clario about why those things happened can help healing Donovan asked the archdiocese cese to pay for him and his wife to travel to see Schaefer In June 2004 the archdiocese sent him a check for It has also paid for his psychological counseling Donovan said Donovan has retained a lawyer who is negotiating with the archdiocese for a financial settlement After his 1995 conviction Schaefer was sentenced to 16 years in prison by Circuit Court Judge William of Prince Georges George's Md County But after Schaefer had served less than five months suspended the rest of the sentence sentence sentence sen sen- tence and released him to a facility facility facility facil facil- ity for priests with psychological problems Now 80 Schaefer lives in Vianney Renewal Center in Dittmer Mo about 30 miles from St. St Louis run by the Servants of the Paraclete a religious religious religious reli reli- order of men Its Web site describes it as a community for priests who cannot engage in inactive inactive inactive active ministry for personal related health I psychological social pr or canonical ons He is not allowed to leave the community unsupervised d Washington Archdiocese spokeswoman Susan Gibbs said adding that the archdiocese pays to keep him in hi that facility Hes asked several times tunes to return to Washington on Hed He'd like to die here Gibbs said And we have declined because we want to ensure that he never returns to this community where he harmed children Schaefer is not receiving a church pension she said Schaefer did not respond to a message left with a Vianney official official official cial seeking comment Donovan and his wife Sharon met with Schaefer in St. St Louis A psychologist treating Schaefer was also present Donovan said Schaefer who is tall thin and balding was aloof the couple 1 k said in separate interviews We were expecting to find a feeble old man in poor health Sharon Donovan said He seemed to be bea a vigorous on quite a dapper man Well-dressed Well well-groomed well urbane quite distant quite cavalier cavalier cavalier cava cava- lier about the whole thing Schaefer S h lid not noi admit doing anything wrong with Donovan Donovan both b tl said But Sharon Donovan said he told her husband Im sorry for anything I might have done to hurt you Donovan recalled that Schaefer said that he had found his peace with God and that God had forgiven him Their meeting also included this He had no recollection of Abuse Victim Cont Cant on Page 7 j 1 Abuse Victim Cont from Page 2 me Donovan said Zero Initially Donovan said sail he felt elation that he had conducted myself as a gentle gentle- man I came away feeling empowered But Buta a few weeks later it hit me like a ton of bricks and he sought professional help foran foran for foran an emotional breakdown What Schaefer could not recall Donovan could not forget The pale red-headed red priest at Holy Name favored him Donovan said often taking him out of class to spend time together because as Schaefer told the nuns he thought the boy might have a vocation to be bea a priest Schaefer also knew Donovan loved wrestling and during spring break in 1956 when when-no when no was in the he school he suggested suggested suggested sug- sug i they wrestle He showed up saying he had forgotten his wrestling gear and asked whether they could wrestle Roman Greco style or nude Donovan said I gave no thought to the impropriety of it he said As wrestled for the they next three of an hour Schaefer got increasingly excited and aggressive finally attempting to sodomize him Donovan recalled At the very end I was fighting someone who was trying to rape me he said He said he struck the priest with an openhanded openhanded openhanded open- open handed slap across the face I expected a lightning bolt from God because Id I'd hit a priest but he immediately stopped and whimpered Donovan said The building where he attended eighth grade is now a day care and parish activity center On his visit he quickly found the musty auditorium where he played a munchkin in the Wizard of Oz and the old basketball court where I proved what a terrible terrible terrible ter ter- basketball player I was But the low room with its dusty wrestling mats that he had come to see was not there A layer of concrete covers the brick wall where as Donovan recalls there used tobe a door to the room where he iwas was molested He said he was not disappointed I feel very good about being here It completes what I had to do Ive I've got what I needed out of it he said There were many good days here There was only one bad |