Show Real entertainment discovered during Super Bowl Sunday J r fY f Nick Parker The Globe About a week-and-a-half week ago I found the coolest show ever There was intense drama high flying action funny missteps and new records Its It's the watched most-watched tele tele- A vision event in annual American tradition Im I'm talking about the Super Bowl The first highlight of the event was when the two guys Im I'm not very good with names theother the theother theother This other team with a secret play and sneaky play was so devious be pulled out on that it could only Super Bowl Sunday There was a secret fridge in this guys guy's apart apart- secret ment That's right a This led into some corporate corporate corporate corpo corpo- rate cavemen that according to the should've used program about the The worst part 0 out drawn-out evening was the long The weird thing is commercials were about foo foot foot- that all of them ball It was like one long segmented segment segment- complete with h ed infomercial and even testimonials testimonials testimonials tes tes- tes- tes interviews statistics that used the by old guys product back in the day P that big white-haired white guy Even tried hawking hawking hawking hawk hawk- video games the from all night ing this football thing draw on the He sure does like to screen a lot I could've sworn that this huge infomercial was longer than the actual variety show that I was watching When the action returned the Sprint cell phone with crime deterrent had me off my couch The bit with the streaking sheep was kind of cute too An office full of monkeys found a small gimmick to keep the bit slightly fresh They introduced a similarly fated woman in an office full of jackasses donkeys The Rolling Stones took the stage after what seemed like an eternity of more football presentation presentation presentation presen tation Mick Jagger could really A h 1 n b I. I r I 1 ld Stand 10 to eat eai ta a c U t i cou cousee vuu see his ribs deteriorating in front of my eyes His tube-top tube looked like it was purchased at Baby Gap Keith Richards is looking great too I only wish that I could chain chain- smoke for about 50 years and have havethe havethe havethe the energy to play playa a full rock con con- cert I cant can't even walk from the newspaper office to the pm parking king lot without stopping for a quick nap Directly following a three-song- three super-set super the old men retired for forthe forthe the thc evening and more terrible football were on This part was the worst piece of the sweaty-dude sweaty pie though There was no action to be seen All AllI I saw were that John Madden video game guy and some other dude talking about how great the teams were Wow if anybody was buying this I felt sorry for them When that terribly long commercial commercial commercial com com- mercial ended I was treated to a slightly nutty piece that featured a giant lizard and robot meeting falling in love and subsequently giving birth to a guzzling gas-guzzling American automobile Some of the stuff they think of these days just baffles me Throughout the night of award- award winning television there were also a few repeating parts One of the themore themore themore more prominent was a short hort with large men talking about visiting some theme park I dont don't know if I really got that one And apparently theres there's a Code Black in some hospital Someone should check checkon on that In my interest of this show I looked up Greys Anatomy on Yahoo but all I got were medical books What is a Code Black anyway I have some exciting news is back Yes that's right I saw it with my own two eyes He untied himself with a car freshener air-freshener shimmied down a rope with a tube-sock tube and a car with a turkey-baster turkey and some other cool junk That guys guy's pretty sweet He really likes too Even though the football got in inthe inthe inthe the way and the skits were extremely short most were only about 30 seconds the Super Bowl totally rocked Ill I'll definitely do this again next year I only hope they get rid of that stupid football thing It really gets in the way and andI I dont don't think anybody really cares for it I really feel like buying stuff now |