Show Jar head Welcome to the Suck Aaron Zundel The Globe Im I'm have to admit that Ive I've never neverseen neverseen neverseen seen a movie quite like I also admit that I think they chopped off the end of the I think it originally read something like Welcome to the Attempt at Fairly Portraying Marines Youve You've Ever Seen is based on the real life best selling memoirs of Anthony Swafford a Marine sniper who fought well kind of ot in Operation Desert Storm back in 1991 Swafford guides us through 1 f f f 4 M tr 4 oa i d WELCOME 1 10 I THE I boot camp deployment and the thelong thelong thelong long wait in the desert for war to arrive Its It's really a fascinating ride too bad it gets bogged down downin in smarmy condescending cism Like I said before Ive I've never neverseen neverseen neverseen seen anything quite like it It really really really real real- ly is a powerful recollection of Anthony Swafford played cynically cynically cynically cally but believably well by Jake Gyllenhaal wartime experiences of boredom angst fear excitement excitement excitement excite excite- ment and insanity But it also just kind of left me cold Swafford's portrait of bored soldiers out in inthe the desert had promise but he looses his way when instead of warriors with a purpose he paints them as killers with nothing better to do dothan dothan dothan than jerk off There is no doubt that d director t Sam a t Mende d to Perdition A s tal tal- tal He has a knack for soliciting soliciting soliciting solicit solicit- ing believable moving performances performances performances mances and is no exception Jamie Foxx happens to give his best albeit supporting p performance to date as the commanding commanding commanding com com- manding Siek He also puts some absolutely stunning visuals on the screen like when Swafford and company have to spend a night in the ghostly flaming Kuwaiti oilfields oil oilfields oilfields fields But great acting and pretty pictures do not a complete movie make Its It's apparent that Mendes tries so hard to present an objective slice of life soldiers soldier's story but what he fails to realizes is that it doesn't matter flatter how unbiased and objective his presentation is when his material material mater mater- material ial is both biased and objective by It its it's s very nature t. t To his credit nothing the director director director tor could have done would have helped this movie The flaw lies at atthe atthe l k the very heart of x the story j I believe that Swafford's I account of his i experiences in the I desert are valid 4 Im I'm even sure that t they are J I true What I wont won't believe is his unspoken assertion that every soldier should feel the same way he does t t fi l L Jake Gyllenhaal portrays Anthony Swafford a who joins up and then serves in the Marines during Operation Desert Storm Gyllenhaal donned a Santa hat and thong while playing the inebriated officer during a party on Christmas Eve He sacrifices the integ integrity ity of KiS' KiS his history story ory by y le leaving ving out ari s 's brt d P et n iff ar v fr t It lieu of cynical nitpicking lie He tie also fails to realize that he creates just about every single one of his own problems a certain Christmas Eve explosion comes to mind and just blames them on everyone else his buddies his girlfriend the government government government govern govern- ment whatever Throughout the film I found myself wondering if this guy could hold any job at all without bitching all the time I also thought that my Grandpa could teach him a thing or two about life being what you make of it In short the movie was really lopsided I could understand the thee viewpoints the emotions and even the motivations What I couldn't understand was the manipulative nature in which they were presented Despite its it's broad marketing Ja ad isn't going to be for vety ne ie e. e First off its it's foul And AndI S 1 I dont don't mean a little foul I mean I II I Andrew Dice Clay might blush inthis in inthis this movie It is after all about of bunch of Marines This movie will also disappoint those who are looking to see a traditional popcorn popcorn popcorn pop pop- corn war flick as there is no combat combat combat com com- bat to speak of in the entire two hours Also I would warn away j anyone who is in the military It stands a good chance of just making making mak mak- making ing you angry For the rest of you who just want to see some good acting and a reasonably reasonably reasonably rea rea- rea- rea moving story you might like it but I still dont don't really recommend recommend recommend rec rec- it Seeing as how it only pr presents half the truth it only gets half the score This movie gets 5 10 A j a 3 is rated R R I |