| Show Dive Five things our grand kids will laugh at us for l Christian Leikam Opinion Writer Do you ever laugh at your grandpas grandpa's strange word choice Have you ever gone through an older relatives relative's yearbook and chuckled to yourself wondering what were they thinking Well your kids and and their friends mends and cousins will all see newscasts and T. T TV V shows from our niche in time and their that's what kids will drink drinkin in the future will fly out of their noses Here are five of the many reasons why Number Five Our lack of homicidal robots These days you hear a lot Jot about urban decay dangerous cities and neighborhoods and gang violence The world is dangerous and growing more so by the year but every criminal or psychopath will be made obsolete in the future What could possibly cause such a dramatic change in society and how could it be a bad bada a thing Gigantic crime- crime oriented robots with laser vis vision on super strength and the intelligence of an which is fairly smart depending on what its it's doing will of course That's right our will make fun of us because they have to contend with mentally unstable mechanical men and back in the early 21 st century were we're worried about getting our stereos stolen from our cars Number Four Today's movies There are fewer and fewer original ideas for movies every year For example according to there is a Battleship movie in production Just to tobe tobe tobe be clear that's a movie based on the board game Battleship where the object of the game is to lieto lie lieto lieto to the other player and put the small pieces in your mouth at least that's how I played when I was little This waning originality involved in mainstream cinema will continue straight through the very future this article is about but our wont won't care they'll still mock us In the year 2051 the biggest summer blockbuster will be a remake of the 2032 film Crossword Puzzle an action film where the stars have to find the correct words to complete the puzzle before the earth explodes That m movie vie is totally made up But it seems reasonable enough because movies in 42 years will be terrible if things continue the way they are Those will still laugh at us though because Crossword Puzzle can be seen in five dimensions in select theaters as opposed to the pitiful three dimensions that are currently available Number Three The Apocalypse This is one of those things that not everybody is involved in believes in or even cares about but our will probably get a kick out of the whole 2012 end of the world theory along with any other apocalypse H ft r r nuo W t t t f 4 predictions since the 21 st century started Whether its it's something you believe in or not the apocalypse is something our will mock us for mostly because the world clearly hasn't ended since those are arc laughing There is one stipulation though and that is that some of the futures future's youth will admit that the world arguably might have ended when the ice caps melted and the sea levels rose suddenly However those kids will be called nerds by the ones who are just totally excited that they get getto getto getto to surf in Utah The melted ice caps will also give the kids more fodder they'll think we made California up Grandpa there isn't another state west of here just ocean In the eyes of our the great state of California will just be a figment of our senile minds Number Two vo Our technology Sure technology will be incredible as far into the theS thed d i S l' l o future as were we're talking about but they wont won't be laughing the the or automated paper towel dispensers because they arent aren't as advanced as what they're used to The laughable concept to children of the future willbe will willbe willbe be how compact sleek and shiny everything is now The generalization about the future that many of ofus ofus ofus us make is that it will be shinier faster cleaner and ando o more convenient In reality the whole retro fad thanks Urban Outfitters will have grown to a point that everyone in 40 years will look exactly like they're from Brooklyn New York circa 1984 Partly because the bright colors boom boxes and Adidas shoes look cool but also so that they wont won't be mistaken for a robot which will be avoided at all costs see reason number five Number One Our complete and udder lack of This is by far the saddest reason on the list Sure homicidal o J H r robots and the end of the world are downers but 2009 is supposed to be the future and yet none of us take to school We We have to drive or take thebus thebus the thebus bus both of those things have wheels and rarely fly up into the air so they're worthless In the future you'll stand standon on your front lawn shaking your fist with anger and discreetly wiping a tear from your eye as you watch young hooligans drop garbage on your property from 50 feet up You'll be crying because you wish that you too could soar through the heavens on a noisy backpack that shoots fire But alas those things didn't exist when you were young and now it would be legitimately dangerous to allow an 80 year old to fly a that's common sense Also why are kids dropping garbage on your front lawn Because they think its it's funny to see you shaking your fist and crying AI |
