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Show Happened in Heaven The golf match to end all golf matches was played up in heaven by St. Paul. St. Peter had the honor on the first tee and promptly prompt-ly made a hole in one. St. Paul, undaunted, repeated the performance. perform-ance. St. Peter marked the scores down dutifully on his card, then remarked, "What do you say, Paul? Let's cut out the miracles and get down to business." Hard of Hearing Flo What's that big noise outside? out-side? Jo Oh, it's just a man talking to himself. Flo But why is he shouting? Jo I guess he's a little deaf? Dis-Appointment "I have come to make an appointment ap-pointment with the dentist," said a reluctant caller. "He is out just now," answered the nurse. "Fine!" exclaimed the caller, "And when do you expect him to be out of his office again?" Self-Control Mrs. Fiery was born with a temper tem-per like gunpowder. "Tell me, dear," said her husband, hus-band, after one of her outbursts, "how it was I never discovered this unhappy weakness of yours during our courtship days? However How-ever did you restrain yourself?" "Well," replied his wife, "I used to go upstairs and bite pieces out of the top of the oak dressing-table." dressing-table." Preparation Farmer Jones Well, I guess my son is going to be a farmer after all. Farmer Brown What makes you think so? Farmer Jones Well, he's taking tak-ing fencing lessons at college. On the Wing Jones had started country traveling trav-eling for a new firm, and departed depart-ed from the city in high spirits. His letters to the firm during the first week were full of hope and promise. There were chances of orders here, there, and everywhere, every-where, but he had not got them j yet. He told the manager in each letter that the promises were feathers in his cap. I Eventually he ran short of j money and wired for some to pay i his fare home. He received the reply: "In each letter you say you have earned another feather. String them together and fly home " |