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Show Kathleen Norris Says: Running Away From It All llrll Hymllfiito. WNIJ I'Mluri-. She may be the humblest worher of nil our 30 million working women. A DIFFERENT KIND OF CRISIS "Members of his family all sponk languages, have traveled, trav-eled, know about books and music it all comes easy to them. I am not even grammatical; gram-matical; I've had no chance to improve. Nobody is unkind to me, but nobody needs it me . . . That is the unhappy predicament pre-dicament in which Ann finds herself. She married the son of a very rich family, and now he's going to nar. She knoivs that she will not be happy living with his family. According to Miss Norris, Ann is justified in going off to find ivork of her own. Hard work, work that trill bring her into contact with other women working as hard as she does. Or she might join the W ACS armed forces. And if Ann is wise, she will begin to study serious, to improve herself in every possible nay. Then, when her husband returns, she will be able to take her place at his side, confident that she no longer is superfluous. super-fluous. ' By KATHLEEN NORRIS t( T AM envious of my husr I band, his sisters, broth-J- ers and friends," writes Ann from Boston, "and as a result I am half-sick with misery, mis-ery, resentment and hate. "I married 'way above any expectations a girl like myself might have," her letter goes on. "Herbert is the youngest son of a very rich family; there are six perfect servants in this house; I have nothing to do. We live with his moth-ei4, moth-ei4, a widowed sister, and her three half-grown children. Everyone else has children. I was in a motor accident in the middle of my first pregnancy, never can have a child. This broke Herbert's heart (he was driving), and his mother's heart, too. Nobody cared about my heart. "They all speak languages, have traveled, know about books and music mu-sic it all comes easy to them. I am not even grammatical: I've had no charices to improve. Nobody is unkind to me, but nobody needs me. Often it seems to me that days go by without anyone speaking to me. Oh, they say 'good morning' and 'more tea?' but they don't really talk to me and I'm not surprised. I'm shy and unhappy and superfluous. L 1 A different type of woman might have profited by seven years' association asso-ciation with these aristocratic rela-tives-in-law, might have gone steadily stead-ily to work at music and languages, made a study of social usages and terms. And a different type of family fam-ily might have sensed the predicament predica-ment of the youngest member Ann was just 17 when she married, and have made it easier for her. Some sister-in-law, some one of the younger young-er aunts and cousins might have taken tak-en Ann under her wing, helped her along the hard path. But evidently Ann was not capable of absorbing the culture all about her, of enjoying enjoy-ing her adventure, and evidently the hard-shelled Social Registerites didn't feel inclined to make any effort ef-fort in the direction of Herbert's wife. So the best thing to do, for the duration anyway, is to break away, find work, friends, amusement. And, if Ann is wise, she will begin to study seriously on the side, improve her pronunciation, her choice of terms, her knowledge of good books and of what is going on in the world. Sometimes, if the security of small children is involved, a woman is obliged to endure difficult conditions the indifference of her husband, the troubles created by his mother and sisters, the sense of being pushed aside and made to feel ridiculous ridic-ulous or superfluous. But in Ann's case these elements don't exist. Through no fault of her own she is childless, and temporarily temporari-ly husbandless. She has every right to find for herself a happier set of circumstances: If she can be generous gen-erous enough to do this without jeopardizing jeop-ardizing the dignity of the family, if she can manage to maintain a friendly correspondence with her mother-in-law, and go home for an occasional visit, she will be sure to find her own place secure and important im-portant in the circle after the war. "Now Herbert's going to Africa, and I am left to take up Red Cross work with his mother, read books, listen to the radio. It seems to me will go mad. What am I doing wrong, what should I do? Can you help me? I feel as if I was in a bad dream." Unhappy Wife Should Leave. That's the letter, and in answer I say that there are circumstances when the only cure for daily, hourly miseries of jealousy and suffering is to get out. Such a case is that of the office clerk who is brought into constant contact with the married employer with whom she is in love, Dr the mother who cannot stand by and see an adored ignorant idle extravagant ex-travagant new wife make her son miserable. Ann has an excellent argument in that Herbert is calmly leaving her to join the armed forces. He is justified; he probably did not even consult her about the step. A war is on, and men are needed. But women are needed, too, and Ann is equally justified in going off to find work of her own. Hard work; work that will bring her into contact with women working as hard as she. The WACs, perhaps, or the WAVES. Or let her get right on the assembly line in 'one of the thousands of new factories,, foundries or machine shops. With her changed clothes, environment, environ-ment, contacts, friendships she will find herself again. ' Her deadened personality will develop, self-confidence and good simple common sense will return. She may be the humblest worker of all our 30,000,000 working women; the annals of victory vic-tory may never hear of her, but she will play her part, just as the tiniest cog and pin and screw of a great battleship plays its part, and success wouldn't be achieved without her., --- V Jt J , fi 4 "iow Herbert's going to Africa |