Show kathleen norris says womans comans unseen power brightens brig bitens lives bell syndicate service lct r t N A V A good mother has the secret oj of making herself invisible but the husband who pays little attention to her presence the son who occasionally hits her temple with a hard checked cheeked kiss how hout often do they think of what she is instead oj of what she does by KATHLEEN NORRIS T HEN you were a small W A child and read fairy tales the most fascinating situation of all the one in which the prince or princess could become invisible at will to be able to take part to listen to see everything ev ery that was going on and yet to be unseen oneself how intoxicating that prospect was there were years in my young life when I 1 felt that if a wrinkled crooked old fairy suddenly did present herself to me to offer me just one fulfilled wish that wish inevitably must be for the power to make myself invisible years afterward I 1 learned that it is always possible to enjoy that particular fairy gift but to find the fairy one must walk through lonely and sorrowful ways and pay the faires price of humiliations and sorrows and tears humiliations and sorrows and tears these are such wholesome medicines tor for us all such strengthening teachers such means of grace I 1 wonder why we all dread and avoid them so strenuously the only worthwhile women in the world are the women who have had long acquaintance with them but that is an aside to get back to the fairy gift of invisibility any woman can have it it if she loves those around her so much that their safety and comfort are her delight and she is willing to be in influence the unseen power in the background of 0 their lives that makes everything smooth and bright her magic unseen good mothers have the secret ol of making themselves invisible sometimes tor for years at a time the gentle kindly capable ingenious tireless loving woman who is at the head head of a family keeps herself ancher and her magic completely unseen perhaps there is riot not too much money in the family perhaps there are girls and boys of different tastes and ages a chronically weary and nervous man an older person grandma or grandpa or aunt sally a temperamental assistant in the kitchen or no helper at all all these natures nati ares and elements are welded together by mother but nobody knows it because mother Is invisible what the family sees and feels and enjoys are the smoothly made beds upon which slips and sheets change themselves by unseen means the prettily set table with the marigolds or daisies in the glass bowl the hot soup ready cream of pea soup for everyone except jane who gets her clear soup every night newspapers are on hand when they are new and disappear when they are old telephone messages are delivered tom and mimsy are helped with homework sent off to the movies on saturday with the requisite dimes tor for sodas zinc jane of course may have the living room for her gang sunday night annie may have a day off to go see her sisters baby dads mother must have a fresh pot of tea taken way upstairs to her room of course ashes there all the time right before their eyes and of course anyone who looked right at her would see her comfortably stout in her fifties getting gray liking sur to finish the crossword puzzles when the children abandon them hall half done insisting on rubbers HER OWN CHOICE how often do you think about the comfort of that invisible someone who always manages to have dinner ready on time to remember th that at you dont eat this and cant wear that to sharpen your p pencils find your rubbers and entertain your unexpected guests she may be invisible going about her work with no thought of reward for her ter generosity ero sity patience and love it is her own choice to remain in the background but it should be your choice to remember the wife or mother who makes your home a pleasant place opposed to the banging of doors and peerless in the arrangement of a tray for the sick the adjustment of 0 a hot water bottle the pressing of a shirtwaist chooses to be invisible but how much do they really see her this husband who pays so little attention to her actual presence but swears and shouts and feels mar byred if she happens to be absent tor for an undue hour or two the these se sons and daughters who occasionally hit her temple with a hard checked cheeked kiss or teed feed her very soul with a shouted thanks mom youre a peacha this grumpy old man or fussy old woman who blinks at her with dissatisfied dally daily questions mollie you arent giving that girl another halfday half halt day off are you this aint the same tea Is it what evers become ot of that little piller 1 I had for my back what possessed those children to carry on that way last night how often do they look at mollie and think ot of what she is instead ot of what she does not often no s hes invisible and the wonderful part of it is that she has deliberately chosen to be invisible to sink her life in theirs to taste tor for hersell herself the happiness ot of service a happiness deeper than any they will ever know when women write me despairing letters about their tangled affairs the parents who misunderstood them all through girlhood the first marriage to a man who was totally incapable ol of appreciating a good wife the second venture with another man who does not understand my little boy and repeatedly favors his own child I 1 wonder whether they know how close this magic and mystic power of making oneself invisible Is the power to make all these lives happier on their thaid terms not on hers and to find herself a fulfillment and on an interior peace of which she even dreamed the cause of it all halt half the nervous ills ot of womanhood perhaps more than half come from the miserable inability under which we all suffer to get away from self nervous breakdowns and morbidity and even more serious troubles stem from just this one thing brooding over mistakes and wrongs resenting injustices and slights sometimes a woman who feels that she has just generally made a mess of everything actually slips over the fine borderline between normality and insanity and cant get back but the invisible woman la is in no such danger there is always someone she can serve someone whose life she can make easier someone tor for whom she can plan |