Show kathleen norris says i I A call aalt for help from a devoted husband bell service less 11 bring home office worl work lucie luci e complains that we never do anything soc social to by KATHLEEN NORRIS EAR mrs norris D j writes a man who signs himself bothered what can a man d do 0 wi with th a wife who is always in the blues my wife is 34 weve been married eleven years and have three fine children childr en girls of 8 and 2 and a boy of 5 two years ago just before my littlest sweetheart was born we had a sad winter vinter my cifes mother died and our boy was ill for weeks with mas tol ditis lucle lucia was u up nights we both were and my loss of my job at the same time did not help matters we go got tover over a thousand dollars in debt and as little diana was delicate and lucle lucie is not a robust woman she got tired and depressed being a s splendid manager and conscientious spender my wife did her share perhaps more than her share in extricating us from all this trouble with careful spending and eliminating her part time maid and with a little luck in business for me we have paid oft off every cent bought a news new stove and radio and have kept the car in repair I 1 am a real estate salesman in business with a brother and in good times averaging more than a month Every things wrong theme song now but by all rights we ought to be happye the children are in splendid health the older girl exceptionally advanced and attractive the boy still slight but gaining and my little rosebud the darling of us all lucie too eats well and sleeps well but she cannot throw oft off her dt dismal me I 1 moods everything Is wrong wong everyone else has what she wants the atmosphere of the house bouse is beginning to be affected by it and the children murmur to me about mothers dreariness if I 1 bring home office work lucie complains that we never do anything social if I 1 suggest a movie she says that ethels husband works most nights and ethel has a new fur coat iffe if we make her join jorfi us on a picnic damp ground mosquitoes flies lear fear the children are eating too much everything upsets her it if we leave her at home she is in tears all day when the young youngsters are hungry she will watch them eating and say that heavy tatty fatty food will give them bad dreams if they dont eat she is beside herself with anxiety and wants tonics and vitamin pills for them when I 1 come in at night I 1 call to her but she rarely answers I 1 go to the kitchen doorway and say something and she sighs and says well I 1 wish I 1 could feel as cheerful as you do about it but the way the world Is now I 1 dont see how anyone can laugh at dinner she sits perfectly silent sometimes with her eyes filling with tears it if one of the children gets oft off a joke she listening has to have it repeated poor people cant do this or that she says or if papa loses his job again and so on have you ever eve handled a case like this before and if so what did you advise and did it work cure core up to patient poor bothered I 1 can only say in answer that I 1 HAVE handled cases like this before and whether it works or not is entirely up to the victim of this miserable psychosis this dreary state of mind and not at all to the actions of those about her many women have an attitude somewhat lik like ethis this comans womans wo mans atts only perhaps a little less extreme I 1 mean that they are quiet dismal martyred marty red during the humdrum hours of everyday living for wives only its up to the little wife to supply the optimism wound around the family fireside jor for the man of the house has trouble enough in this modern business world and when he comes home he needs a little cheering up dt at any rate what kathleen norris says in her current article written ritten iv to help one family in their heir t particular prop problem bgern and intended as a lesson to others headed in the same direction ind and dont think that men dont like i e to hear ear a little it e good oo 00 news when w en they c ome come home ito for they th do good news is comforting com orting an and comfort com fort is important to happy appy married marr i ed 1 life ile they make no effort to be helpful or cheerful in mood they will spend mournful hours over the construction st of 0 an icebox ice box cake or the krAt knitting bratting ting of a baby blanket and then produce these things with a subdued gloom that robs them of all charm any woman with a home a good husband three fine children an income that would be wealth in nine tenths of the countries of the globe who talks of her fam family ilyas as poor people and envies other women ta their air fur coats is to beg begin in with a stupid woman she lives in a narrow anxious uncomfortable groove she has built a jail tor for her soul and only she can unlock it and let the soul fly free there may be a physical base tor for this unnecessary glumness but very likely there it Is really a bad habit a custom into which some women fall of sighing and mourning growing tearful over their own depressed thoughts sinking into long silences making no effort to contribute their share to io the tam fam ilys happiness they will make beds even hang fresh curtains curtain s and put sowers flowers about but they do it all with a shouldering ing sense of resentment sent ment and weariness never thinking that the old words are as true now as when they were written the letter kil krueth leth but in the spirit there is life lie he likes good news even when he knows it true even when he knows it is a flight of imagination and optimism a man loves to hear good news when he gets home at night no matter what the events of the day have signified he is comforted is given fresh confidence when his wife laughs at worries reminds him of other evil promises that never came to anything and assures him that as long as he and she are well and the children well nothing can come along that they cant face and conquer get along somehow they can rent this house and move to smaller quarters and it will all be tun some years ago a young husband and wife of my acquaintance were in desperate fear for the life of a tiny baby the baby had been rushed to a hospital the mother still weak from her confinement two weeks earlier was with her mother when the husband went to the hospital for a conference of physicians he was told to see that his wife got what rest she might in the night for we will have sad news for her in the morning the head doctor said the young man carried this message home delivering it in due time but omitting the word sad news asked the women of the household he means good newill news 1 the wife slept deep and and restfully everyone slept except the father he sat near a telephone all night and in the morning good news came little mark had weathered the night he is now a splendid boy i of three and the family forgetting the terrible scare never will forget the generosity and ind courage and faith of the man who carried them through it it |