Show laws could adato personal comfort 87 LARDNER to the elie editor heres a copy of the message I 1 am sending to contress con cress erets and maybe they might not hot dast give it out to the papers ro co heres fl a copy of it to congress well ladys and gelts I 1 realize it blut customary for nobody only the president to send you boys a message but SUD still rod and all theys they no law vs DO nobody sending you one a specialty specially a man that come as close to the white house bouse as myself cad and might of got nil kit the way in if I 1 of left washington a few minutes before the cool edges decided to make it a amusement park at least judg eing from fro in some of the birds that did get in I 1 dont see how bow they could of barred this baby and besides if you boys Is anything like our last congress a message will go just as big whether it comes from me or the president or the julja board so anyway I 1 am going to write and point out a few things that needs tension well gents you know the old gag that people that lives la in a glass house bouse drink antof a bottle so the place to commence mareing reforms it I 1 right where you are at namely the cat ions capital and I 1 dont know no way you can make a better beginning than split appt a committee to attend all the ball games in washington this season and find out it if the b home ome team Is really playing their best beat and the next thing to do Is to give the town pullman telephone booths so a person can enjoy a nights rest while waiting for the wrong number anil and thus kill 2 birds with one n nickel lye be rides getting your shoes oboes shined please use this rag to wipe your razor as ai one small cut destroys a towel guests without baggage 25 acts extra tor for meals served in booth stop have you roil anything left pass a bill providing tor for the president oot not to leave washington during hi bl incumbrance as they are libel tip run wild when they get away front roni home and go to gay paree and buck the tiger or something presidents of course like to travel because they get 10 acts per mile which nets theio tlell 2 cis profit et the present rates minus the tax on a upper hat but it if they claim they cant yei get along alding without It bout some such kind of a get rich quick scheme wily why allow thein a dime tor for every mile they stay on the fairway airway find I 1 gues guess s by the end of 0 4 ira rr they will hae base enough saved up to bu 12 A interest in a milk chocolate i also wished you yon would put up tip the names of the different gmt hodgs to in lilg big letters so as when a ninn man 1 show allow hig fiig g his mrs he flie toon she ont art like slie elie tins has film t burrow borrow a 16 yr old dependent child und and gie ghe it 11 to the bliff that figured out the personal exemption allowance anthe income tax und and niale male ilia support it on sax a year pas pars a rule to permit keing ng in n the senate and house so as you boys wont sont keep asking ashing teacher if 1 you can leave the rm so much for local legislation and now we come to matters that effects the whole U S states and the first thing to do Is pass another amendment because it take in both the lath and amendments to have this new amendment provide that election day Is kings X from prohibition so a man will have some place to bang around while the madam Is spoiling ballots repeat repeal the truants law so BO a person wont have to go all spring and fall without a caddy the low law vs the rabbit punch in boxing thle thir punch Is a blow that lands at the base of a fighters brain and it looks to me that the man that lands land it instead of being disqualified ought to be given a seat in the hall of fame along wit columbus and admiral peary no 12 tare fare minded congress wants to show partiality towards either one of the 2 big goat war schools so anther another 0 sporting event that should ought to be laid on the shelf Is I 1 the service game this saves thern them the trouble of getting rid of the tickets pass a law vs men wearing dinner clothes which dont benefit willoey but the chinaman or if it looks like there was too much opposition to abolishing this quaint custom all together at least leaie leae us have hare some goat regulation so as when you ou are called up and ast to dinner you wont have to go through no all day battle of fit the marne maene deciding if you will or of you wont make some kind of a universal rule in regards to hats in coed elevators tile the way it Is now a man Is all right if he be stays in one town but bill the minute he goes visiting he Is all wrong I 1 arr that if you are in you yon kerp keep your hat on the elevator Is in a hotel or a department store tn in N V Y city you also take them olt off in a apt providing the lady aint your own wife or a relative but bin in places like washington you got to expose yourself in elevators of all kinds and when I 1 and the madam were on a sightseeing sight seeing trip to the different floors boors of office didgs I 1 discovered I 1 was the only gent in the file car with a covered egg and felt eien een stiller sillier than ever these le ie a few of the needed legislations Int ions buss boys anil and I 1 wished you would could mid find time to give them tension but I 1 suppose you will he be too busy tuo with the words and musk music or of a pence peace treaty with a country that knows knous tit nr at grasl hus bus heard rumors hint we w aint been fighting them for 10 arl yr 9 by b the h e B loll 1011 U too anol |