Show speed spee in aby michigan K by RING RIN G LARDNER CM SS M M M i j to the editor about a couple of three weeks ago it I had occasions to go from goshen indiana Ind fana to the old home town niles and we decided to take the michigan division of the big 4 on acct acca of it not taking as long like the interurban te and when I 1 enjoy a exper esper lence like that I 1 always feel like I 1 ought to tell ray my readers so as they can enjoy it ad hand you might say well la in the place we called bp ap the goshen station about 3 in the p B M and found out what time the train left but the employees was home come takping their siesta but finely I 1 went over myself in and found him in III and I 1 says what time does the train go to niles kiles so lie he says bays well its ICS due aue to leave here bore at lut but if I 1 was you I 1 get down here at that time because it dont hardly ever leave leane here at that time it I 1 was you I 1 would call me up along about 5 and I 1 will try and ten you how late she Is so I 1 asked him how could a train get late that only came from indianapolis and the time table give it all day to do it in and he said he know no whys ghys or wherefores but he hall had been working there a good many yrs ars and his advice to we me was not to get there at train time so I 1 took his word for it and bantered sant ered down to the station about after 5 and sure enough he was in and I 1 asked him how bow was the train and he said it was on time and I 1 said oh its gone so he says no its only 20 minutes late and when it comes that close to on time what Is the use of finding fault with it and calling it late well along about there was a big seismic disturbance and sure enough along site she come and we was stan g on the station platform waiting and after she was craned up along side of us I 1 and my collar looked like a republican delegate from ga but anyway alip p dumb clumb aboard and set down in a red plush seat and there was 2 other passengers on the train including a man from the mouse house ot of david and his wife I 1 dont know if you know what the house of david Is or not dot well its a sex that lives to in benton II harbor arbor mich ard and its religion Is that as long ts as you dont sin ein you dont die very few of them lives to be but I 1 could easily live to be that age it if I 1 have to fret my life away shaving every A M well this guy parked his head and whiskers on his mrs shoulder to take a nap and I 1 thought shed be tickled to death well along about this time we come to elkhart and it was still broad daylight yet and the sun was shin shia ing in the golden west but lu in come a brakeman dressed in a fedora hat and a mufti and a pair of bhones that had bad been working on the railroad all the livelong day and lie he pulled down all the shades on the sunny side of the ear car and lit a acetylene light and the th lady with me says what in the vald Is he doing that for so I 1 says ne believes in facing daylight da light she laughed heartily wile we was in elkhart the crew found out that we was only about 25 23 minutes late and it would not do to spoil a record so we set around there for about a hr br trying to get back to normal and finely the conductor come in and I 1 asked him what time we was due la in niles and he looked in a book and he said we was due there at so I 1 asked him why did he halt half to look in a book to find out and he said well it if you was conducting a train that never got no place when it was due how could you remember when it was due it if you had asked me what time when it was going to get in niles kiles instead of what time we was due there I 1 could of told you without looking in no book well the next station la Is granger where the grand trunk crosses and they have built a new union station that will hold bold 5 or 6 S people but never does docs but the train has to stop step a long while there on this the theory that they might be somebody on tile tho trunk line so desperate that they want to transfer but nobody did and I 1 said now we wont have no more stops till we get to niles but just before we come came to that metropolis a bird with a red flag come out on the track and stopped us a and nd it seems like they was a freight fm ight coming in the opp direction on the same and only track and 1 or the other of us had to back on to a sidling because they neither one of us hae baie the courage to try conclusions ns welt the freight was elected though it grobly had a more valuable cargo myself included and we missed it and rolled into old niles kiles and when w we e got off the train the apostle from the house of david was still napping on hla his old ladys shoulder but she look tickled to death 0 by the bell 9 inc I 1 |