Show I i Ii I. I or of Great Creat love today to all man mane d and especially to you folks og there who cant can't havo have carpet ling seln in n the bath room room 11 la Is something about about car car car- In tho toilet which to me mins prestige It la is a status statue ol of at the most symbolic mid If Fair Lonsie 4 I My Lady f. f li uld d d' d permit and if it she sho would e 9 me whore where those tomato cans this winter I would bit j carpeting up to my knees In the tho boys room mom Perhaps this It II because we weI I I didn't have carpeting In the bathroom when I was a small all bo boy Maybe I am a marked man I Maybe Its It's because we didn't I have holve a bathroom J I And probably what brings it up Is my Intense boiling bolting tooth tooth- I grinding rage at a recent headline head line Agency Says Sas No Carpet at Junior High tins at Brigham C City ty j I This does deco things to me Suddenly Sud Suds denly I am a maniacal seeking to destroy all those who would prevent those poor little kids in Brigham City from tram having havinga a n carpet Those children will never nev nev- never er be the same Imagine this young man of i 21 moping In a corner while I I all the gorgeous babes in the house make useless passes and run their fingers through his hll hair and tickle his hi and bring him drinks and offer him the apartment keys key I and andI andall all ho he does Is I. stand there and andI I mope I the matter anyhow with the guy there one cute kid asks another Oh haven't you heard He Ue has hasan hasan an acute inferiority complex When he was a boy in seventh grade In Brigham City the school board wouldn't buy carpets I This could go on you know This could get geL kicked around I good Parents might sue because I their kids have to wear shoes to school The rho girls girl could complain that the tho carpeting doesn't match their hair hair but but it does over inthe in inthe the other building outs Drop outs would climb endlessly end end- lessl lessly Why should my boy learn to read In the eighth grade There'd Theros no Incentive lie He has nothing to look forward to but drab endless halls hall and rooms room with barren floors Perhaps though the board has something else in mind for that tax money Perhaps they will put I vibrators in all aU the chairs chains to lull the students to s sleep Perhaps they will Install polished rock walls like in BYU Maybe there will be a built ln set sot at every desk Any thing anything at all aU to get the kids kId interested in stuff sturt besides studying Just now the only new school I 1 I I in our area Is le the high school I at Morgan A quick trip over there indicates s there is no car I pet In yet yeL But nut then there isn't any roof either Maybe laybe they're just waiting until the bricklayers brick layers get through Tell you what lets let's do Lets Let's I settle for a a- anice nice red carpet leading leading lead ing from the parking lot to the thel I front door And white chenille rugs in the bathrooms Then we wo wont won't worry quite eo so much about the color of at carpet in the school house Mac |