Show I I oti ji Do Do you fon realize Would you nb U ve What's next week No t silly dlly not April Fools Fool's Day Not 1 Guess again Give up t And right after Turkey comes Christmas shopping Can you belleve belleve be- be lIeve wit It What wo would ld YOU like liker t r tor for for- chr Christmas You buy everything every- every thing thing you Y U can caa right here In the hometown to n hear me Save the JosUe and bump and Insults and tr traffic and and buy It HERE If you caD it from advertisers Inthis in r this this newspaper newspaper ft SA o But But f if you Insist on some- some so different that you cant can't buy It In any of the near-by near cities p perhaps you'd like to choose from the list offered by catalogs 1 which My ly Lady Fair LouIse receives She's on everybody's everybody's evo ev ev- o sucker list f. f Fo For hl Instance t you might like a adoll I doll doIl rV el t with dolls doUs that do EV EVERYTHING VEI people do Oh come Com come now Everything They t ost only 1875 each They got clothes and bunk beds beds' and gee rooted hair I Want some different un underwear under under- er- er w wear How ow about Ants in the x Pants For both lads and lassies adorned with a trio of ants in I abright bright Cute as bugs I Like to fool people peaple Heres Here's a I third eye of ot all things babe You paste It on your forehead between the two real ones onus Or a plastic light bulb you throw on the floor and it doesn't break bra with Maybe a up push pads pads' to fool people Come on now A I realistic skin colored Spook Hand with red f fingernails 1 n Is bony knuckles to hang out the car trunk or the refrigerator door I And for you Incurable snoopers snoop snoop snoopers ers for only 1600 The Big Ear Bar will let you listen In on conversations a block away with transistors and an Inch 18 reflector disc And this you need neel A Helping Hand lIand chain to zip up your own she sheath a t h dress Perhaps a set of dentures dentures dentures den den- tures holding a sponge tongue to moisten stamps How lIow crazy can you get Maybe youre you're the luxurious type The catalog shows an electric electric electric elec elec- FORK It doesn't DO anything anything any anything any any- thing but it plugs In And think of the status Well may maybe be a genuine mink collared key case Only 18 What Mat wont won't John Adkins think of next And heres here's something out of this world A AnOISe nose nOISe hood To keep your nose warm Complete te with wiggly taI tas- tas on the end This for me and Imy my sins Think of the saving on kleenex and hankies I Now lets let's quit being chintzy about this Lets Let's go uptown shall we CoL Lee Bethurum who Is also on a sucker Bucket list thinks he and I should go on this n. n. n But weve we've agreed to take In a third partner This Is pis real realand realand realand and no kidding The Queens Queen's Daimler Only one to one customer This magnificent magni magni- car was built especially for I Her Majesty Elizabeth EUzabeth II in 1962 by Hooper Top Is retractable retractable rei re re- i tractable and end the police equipment equipment equipment equip equip- ment for lor outriders Is still on the car L Last st used to drive the Queen to the Derby at Epsom last year I Impeccable condition even to the expensive fur rug on the floor Appraised In 10 England at app 4 Delivery to be made In In- London US U.S. Now if three of us go It'll cost only 12 grand apiece We could take every three weeks of f having It set out there In Inthe Inthe inthe the driveway and when the little little little lit lit- tle wife wants to run d down wn to the store she could hop In with the and the police pollee outriders outriders outriders out out- riders and maybe riders from the l or orthe the kids or the Kamas Valley Ladles Ladies and swoop up to the store In I 1 style I Still why did the Queen let It ItCO CO go Maybe its jit's drafty M Maybe the floor rug Is monkey Instead of minkey Maybe there Isn't a built In TV set or bar Who knows perhaps the has to shift I I gears grindingly gly on the way way to to toI the race track Or the store Lets Let's j I not go into this fully fellers until we send our agent to Lon Lon- donNow don Now were we're not in the gift gUt business business business busi busi- ness but if you dont don't find Ind what you want here well we'll get It U or there aint none Meanwhile keep keepIn In touch Mac |