| Show Something For Everyone By BERT BOYACK After Arter 19 years In the entertainment entertainment enter enter- entertainment b business u s i n es s I have learned one thing thing there there will always be a new game tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow tomor tomor- row Milton Berle on his last appearance of his now cancelled cancelled cancelled can can- celled tv show Other shows that remain on are no less or to say the least any better And Major Bowes paraphrased this when he lie said The he wheel of fortune spins and who'll get knocked off nobody knows An irate general insurance agent wrote a hot memo to the home office complaining be because because because be- be cause his commission check was 30 short After checking his account the head of the ac accounting accounting accounting ac- ac counting department called him silos to say Last month I find nod we overpaid you 30 You didn't complain about that mistake An occasional mistake I can overlook retorted the general agent but not two in a row Insurance executive to new salesman Good he heavens a v ens Crenshaw if you cant can't learn to drink coffee and write figures on a tablecloth you'll never learn to make a go of it in the insurance business The young fellow had just been hauled into the police station station station sta sta- tion and brought before the desk sergeant for questioning Have you ever been arrested before Oh no sir answered the culprit And I must say theres there's 4 4 been some misunderstanding here beret Pilfering my little brothers brother's brothers brother's broth broth- ers er's rs r's bank h hardly deserves the attention of the police Pilfering your little brothers brother's brothers brother's brothers brother's broth broth- ers er's bank I P repeated repeat d the desk sergeant What is this anyway anyway anyway any any- way And he was about to dismiss dismiss dismiss dis dis- miss the prisoner and chew out the arresting officer when said copy intervened Just a minute just a minute minute minute min min- ute interrupted the flat foot The prisoner neglected to mention that his brother happens happens happens hap hap- pens to be a teller in the First National Bank on Main Min Street Philosopher Pete The trouble trouble trouble trou trou- ble with life is that youre you're way half-way through before you realize its it's one of those It Do-It- Yourself deals WITTY TIDBITS A A child is one who stands halfway be between between between be- be tween the television set and an adult VPs VP s 's Hubert H. H Humphreys Humphrey's Humphreys Humphrey's Hum Hum- middle Initial stands for forthe forthe forthe the name Horatio and some of his advisers did not want him to use the initial at all but to get the H out of there Meanest businessman that we have heard of is the one who plays back the tape of the Christmas party be before fore he fires his ls employee A lb Ib ape sleeps where it darn well has the desire One man in an old house says as soon as he he gets that Im Improvement improvement improvement im- im provement loan on his home he heis heis heis is going to use it to move One rugged built woman tried to join the WAC's and she was turned down so she decided to join the infantry because she just loved children A hus- hus I band was going to gi give ve his wife a parakeet for their anniversary anniversary anniversary sary but they only had one so h he hey had to settle for a canary T Father to son As punishment no more watching color tv for fort i the rest of the week you can only listen to your transistor radio Married people manage to make their share of mistakes that is why we have divorce lawyers In New Orleans there 11 lived ved a ayoung ayoung ayoung young Creole Who when asked If her hair were all real Replied with a shrug Just give it a tug And judge by the way that I squeal The pretty girl came upon the lake looked around slipped out of her clothes and was about to slip into the water when a policeman po policeman policeman po- po appeared Pardon miss but no swimming is allowed al allowed allowed al- al lowed in this lake Blushing she said Why didn't you tell me that before I got undressed Well Vell the replied policeman policeman policeman police police- man theres no law against un un- un dressing The deadline is soon for income income in income in- in come tax again and they wont won't want to take the shirt off our back but we could show foresight and check our credit at the local bank N Now ow that the legislature has wound up this session it is hoped that they have not disturbed the voter by trying to get too much out of the taxpayer |
