Show lr Pw- Pw h art 1 11 hero SIMPLIFYING TOE THE T E TAX BLOW The senate finance committee re recently recently re- re recently voted for the Simplified Chart system for helping the public deter deter- determine determine determine mine its income tax It now seems certain that the Without The Spell Dizzy-Spell idea will become law and that the new arrivals within the in income in- in income income come tax classifications will almost be admitted on a You Pay-As-You-Enter system Secretary I says that with the rank and file of taxpayers it aint the money moncy its it's the con con- confusion fusion He contends that a man in inthe inthe inthe the lower brackets should be able to togo togo togo go to a post office glance at a chart chartand chartand chartand and find out what he owes Uncle Sam without going nuts When the income tax was limited to the Upper Brackets and only took in a small proportion of the people it was all right to let them suffer There seemed no reason why they shouldn't be given the works up to and including the headache the spots spot before the eyes the night- night sweats the nervous breakdowns and the mad call for lawyers But the Man Every policy is to be dropped now that the income tax laws have been eased so that anybody can get in S Uncle Sam knows that if the rank and file of his citizens were ever asked to go through all that trouble making out an income tax blank there would be what Willie Howard calls a re re revolt volt Either that or more mental collapses than our in in- institutions institutions institutions could handle Hence the Not A Headache In InA InA InA A Carload type of tax collection It is all right as far as it goes but it doesn't go far enough We think the tax blank should be made prettier And carry a page of fun- fun nies S We submit the following extra sug sug- suggestions suggestions suggestions for making tax paying more painless 1 Make the tax blanks prettier and include a page of funnies r i r 4 l 2 2 Preface each blank with the words Dont Bother Reading This See Your Postmaster 3 postage for return 4 Have the mailman leave each blank with an apology and explain that its it's just too loo i b bad bd d. d 5 Forbid lengthy discussion of the the- the tax tax blank in the home Let the husband say I guess ID I'D run down downto to the post office and have my in income in- in income income come tax apprehensions attended to and let the wife limit her com com- comment comment ment nt to fo Okay I hope its it's nothing serious 6 Have the post office chart printed in colors and throw in a couple of movie shorts in the cor cor- 7 Require R the postmasters to serve hot coffee and sandwiches Do You Remember Remember- Away back when the ultimatum c rth attack 3 tt K s second cond e Japan is proceeding pro with the re re- reconstruction reconstruction re- re reconstruction construction of the Chinese continent with the full operation co-operation of China Churchill's charge that Japan is en en- encroaching encroaching encroaching upon the Chinese people is wholly groundless Japanese spokesman And then again the world orld doesn't seem to understand that those al al- alleged alleged al- al alleged bombs are really flower pots PORTRAIT OF A MAYOR Into an airplane airplane- Out of it quick Into another With shovel and pick Off to a concert Then zip Then zip to a spot To christen a hangar A park or hot all-hot Whisk I To some city To dig a big hole Run a Or help to mine coal This way and that way With gusto and joy joy joy- Flash Fiorello The Dynamo Boy I Hank Greenberg Made Cor Cor- Headline The Hanks are arc coming I A man named Low has bas been named an official of the New NewYork NewYork NewYork York gas shortage crisis e Elmer Twitchell just couldn't re- re resist resist the temptation He walked up to an auto bearing an I Dont Don't Waste Gas sticker and scribbled on onit onit onit it Wanna bet Ima Dodo says she isn't worried about America being drawn into the war for the next month or so It couldn't go in she explains un until until until til after the world series |