Show ELECTRIC SPARKS 66 4 at nut not a word in m any of the party platforms about giving the people the kind of weather they av want ant i 41 the way that the political suitors are flirting with wilh miss aliss suffragette fra ette is something awful 4 f you will have time between iun and election day perhaps to read all the political speeches and all the platforms that have been put forth up to date 8 t cheer up the price of straw biats 1 suin summer nier millinery lit Ibi tiery and peck abou a bou duds is on the toboggan who cares about prime L lits of beef or coal piles while decora decorative necessities are wilbin easy reach 1 what makes you think tit the baby is going to be a great clan ciau asked the 3 aurim 1 mother anxiously the young father said lie ile can say more things that eliat sound well and mean nothing than any kid I 1 ever saw 4 4 you may have the stars in a nail ki keg liang jiang the ocean on oil a rail fence put the sky to soak in a gourd and unbuckle the alie bellyband of eternity and let the sun and moon out but dont think you can escape the place that lies on oil the other side of purgatory it if you dont pay the editor edito r for your paper 4 46 i here is a biography in a nut shell born bom welcomed essed fed grew amused reared studied examined graduated in love loved engaged married quarreled reconciled suffered deserted taken ill died mourned buried and forgotten 4 good times and hard times it its s all the same with the tramp he is no richer or poorer poorer his story alaj never changes lie he lias has been two days withof without t a mouthful to eat at and w wants kufs a dime or a quarter right quick to fill up on it is is said that apples may be ba years by wrapping them in newspapers apers so as to exclude the air tire the ne newspaper vs paper must however be one on which the subscription is paid in full or the alie dampness resulting from tire the due will cause the fruit to spoil A cigarette is a roll of paper tobacco and drugs with a small fire at one end and a big fool at the other some of its chief en are condensed n night ig i it I 1 mare fits cancer of the lip arlic and I 1 stomach spinal meningitis soften ing 11 of the brain funeral sion lion and fi families milies en shrouded in gloom these are the days when the good wife scrubs does alie washing feeds the cow licks the kids gets the meals and does doea things generally gener ally while lier her liege lord is to bs bo found down town on the cornel saving liis his country it i a groat great snap snag this saving ones country and it is a great pity for some of those these old ducks that it cant be worked oftener than onice ome or more years 4 lot let the young man about town out of 01 a job try a year on the farm plowing behind a mule will give him an entirely new constitution take the kinks out of his lead head and the frog g out of f liis his throat t the lie gas out of his 1119 stomach the weakness out of 11 hi legs tile the corns off his toes and give him a good appetite ar honest living and a sight of heaven an exchange gets off tile the following ten cents a line will be charged for obituary notices of all business men dien who do 10 not advertise while living delinquent lin quent subscribers will be charged fifteen cents a line advertisers verti sers sors and cash sub subscriber scriben will receive as good a bond off as we are arc capable of writing without any charge wIlia whatever tover better send in your subscription now it is claimed on good authority that next to a monkey wrench a hair pin is the most useful invention A woman can open a time lock burglarproof safe with a little hairpin hair pin they use them to scratch their heads button bleir shoes pick their teeth punch bed bugs out of cracks run into cakes to see if they are sufficiently baked clean finger enalls nails fasten up stray bangs pick out nuts mits lift stove lids clean t their heir cars and do many other t tN ings |