Show u s e IW aan eo J have you all seen the comet if any of you have not and want to you would do well to buy borrow or steal if you one a double lorgnette or something strone cr if you can get it and brine it into requisition on alie first night when are no symptoms of a cloud at 9 or soon after tins is as early as you can gee it all even with the assistance of a glass when tho eye is in the condition of a burlesque ballet troupe it the comet cannot be eeck at nil I 1 keep on ushie the i lar number here as if ignoring the late important discoverers discover ery by the lick observatory people show ing that are two of it I 1 am something of an astronomer and construe this duality to represent a mother and her offspring what more natural than that a utah comet should thus give vent to her feelings even while scooting along the azure vaults above A good many people auli whom I 1 have the honor to be acquaint edwill doubtless be disposed to question my right to a voice in astronomical matters chev will be unable to comprehend how it is that the necessary time in which to fortify the mind celestially can be taken from editorial literary political legal dramatic mining and military pursuits without leaving a hole somewhere one that I 1 must inevitably fall into sooner or bater I 1 do fall in now and then but get out again and X wish I 1 had as many dollars as I 1 am an astronomer even A good people think that a comet is a harbinger of war and when there is a rumpus of any kind within a year or of the advent of alio silver tailed overhead they chow the rest of us how delightfully harmonious is what is left over from the last stock of superstition lucli beliefs do no particular harm except that they use up tho vau lable time of those who now and then are called upon to listen to them and if they do any good to anybody whether or black native or naturalized members of the salt lake city council or educated men dagges or indians not tasted never be it said that such were deprived of eliat atom of comfort comets were invented a long time ago they are the waifs of the planetary sphere in that no one knows where they came from where they go to or aliat they are composed of wo only know that they us usually unawares flaunt their majestic and glittering raiment before our eyes for a brief period and without having done any harm or accomplished any good chev are the peacocks of the rd tho dudes of fhe upper myr girls of tho watering places overhead tha will o tie vastly deep that lias no shoreland shore sand no bottom A fellow humorist iho late josh billings once declared his belief eliat nothing gas made in vain but he had to confess that accordine to his yiew the time spent in constructing mosquitoes and snake must have been wasted josh was not far wrong but his latof productions out of which no good to man ever comes was much i too limited has imbibed any additional information by reason of tho years he has now apont sitting on i tho cotton colored hidu of damp clouds and keeping his golden harp attuned to the music of the spheres I 1 wish he would s pareja time enough to lit me know what tho markci value of comets is in V S gold coin up there and or not one could be bought with certainty of delivery at any figure also if sash can divine so far ahead what silver is ligety to 0 0 worth when the present congress gets through pounding and kicking at it also if lie lias handy lie might weigh a herald editorial and give us tho percentage of it yields to tho reader having done all this it would bo very pleasing it lie would only let us know what especial purpose the salt lake city government was called in to fill and if any how near they are to the end of their work and if it is likely they will bo called to where they will bo more highly appreciated alian here when tho job is finished and so on but to return to the comet we aro now advised by M Flam marion a great french astronomer and universal this globo on which vre take our meals and from which we take treasures for congress to declare worthless is going to be knocked over the ropes and out of timo by an early comet I 1 read thia alarming intelligence to my landlord but instead ol 01 his reducing the rent as I 1 naturally posed he would he raised it declaring that as the time waa so short lie would have to realize aurb aa poss sible out of his investment and then with a smile as broad and ruddy aa that of your townsman bainee jee when on similar business he insinuatingly admitted that lie for the comet and if I 1 did I 1 could go to place where it was not likely to strike this is a sample of the discouragements to which the delvers into the depths of science are subjected now and then by tho ignorant and indifferent we have hero a curbstone astronomer whose at the disposal of any one who dellrea it at two cents a minute I 1 usually take ft three or three and a halt minu toe pull at it and then as a nickel Is tho nearest change to the exact amount in circulation that is what ho gets he caught on a dime because I 1 happen to have tho customary nickel eliat I 1 hav al w ays prepared beforehand besides a good customer ought to have discounts occasionally I 1 have had two or three fine views of the comet by this means and am prepared to pronounce it as much of a the late ogden newspaper that capia to sany it is about bright the average country editor and retiring a delegate to congress it barely showed its face and then made haste to expose another part of its anatomy and is now skinning away from our sphere of vision at the rate of idilea a day so the telescope man told me but lie must have made a mistake my computations show alie rate to bo miles a day it is strange that there should bo so great a discrepancy between us I 1 have been thinking some ot lecturing in on this subject by making the admission free with no impediments offered to going out nt any time and treating or promising to do so those who remain to tho end it seems to me I 1 might get quite an audience it would certainly bo equal to one I 1 addressed during alio campaign which resulted in alio clinice of the first democratic legislature and as a reward for which and corresponding services a young man who had been in the territory nearly a year was chosen over me a chief clerk of the house of representatives ta tives the meeting spoken of was at poplar grove just bey ant the jordan and the audience consisted of three men five women six children one sweet girl all of them are more or less so two dogs and a cow I 1 captured them all for democracy yourn ESSAY |