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Show good husbnud he was till she saw how generously he behaved about the alimony." Washington Star. A Man's Terror. "Where are you going, my pretty maid?" "I'm going shopping, sir." she 6aid "Won't you enme with mc?" He sboolc his head. And then, base coward, he turned and fled! Washington Star. Left to Her Judgment. "Am 1 the first girl you ever kiFs-od?" kiFs-od?" Asked the fair young thing from the refuge of li Is shoulder. "Well," he replied, "after tho way my arm Just naturally slipped arouni your waist as you uocooscloualj leaned toward me, and my finger tilted your chin as you uncunsctouwiy lifted your head, and I beat forward. Where your lips were waltlru;, aai didn't get the klsft cither on your noa or yo'jr chin, but where It belonged' after all that, and with the knowledge of the subject which, yoy haw displayed. dis-played. I shall say nothing exoevl that I leave the question to your own judgment." Life. . The federal census is principally" valued for providing tho hens with in formation regarding tbe number of uU tliuate consumers they arc expected. I to serve. BITS OF MIRTH. The Secret of Success. The motto of success was given In tho tale, told at a banquet. ' A Swede among the mluers In the West was noted for always striking pay dirt His fellows thought that there must be some secret to the unusual un-usual success of the Swede and questioned ques-tioned him as to how ho always succeeded suc-ceeded In finding the spot where tho gold cropped out. "Veil, y don't know ef Ay can tell anyttang 'bout dat." answered OK "Ay only know dat Ay yust keep on dlggin'." Milwaukee Free Fress. The Finishing Touch. "Are you going to be a good girl, now that mamma has brought you that nice new dress?" "Yes, mamma: but If you wants mo to be a real angel, Just get me a new hat and parasol to match." Harper's Bazaar. Too Tall. ' Farmer (to editor of local paper) I want to put a notice in your newspaper newspa-per of the death of my brother. What's ver price? . Editor Ten shillings and sixpence an Inch, sh. Farmer Oh. I can t afford that; my brother was 6 feet 2 London Opinion A Diagnosis. "How's yer 'usband after tho accident. acci-dent. Mrs Ginnerty?" "Faith, s'imtolmes he's betther an" sumtolmes he's wurse, but from the way ho ylls un' takes on when he's betther, Ol think he's betiher when he's wurse." Kansas City Journal. Why She Stayed at the Foot. j Being upbraided by her mother for being the lowest In her class, little j Mabel exclaimed in tones or injured 'jnnocencc: "It ain't my fault. The girl ( who has always been foot left school." j Delineator. Would Fit, All Right. Customer Why do you give mc sevens when I ask for sixes? Bootmaker Ah. sir, jou will be so pleased with these shoes that your feet will swell with pride Bon Viva Vi-va nt. How Sho Escaped. Pauline, who' had been attending school for almost two weeks, was toll-iug toll-iug of the misbehavior of some of her little classmates. At her mother's question as to whether it had ever been necessary for the teacher to speak lo her, Pauline answered quickly, quick-ly, "Oh, no, mamma." Then. "She had to speak to all the class out mo thin aflernoon." Why. what did she say 7" "Oh," sho said. "Now, children, we'll all wait until Pauline la in order." The Delineator. A Skillful Aviator. . "Are you -Interested In. these aviators?" avia-tors?" - - . ."Intensely... I watched one Ihis morning who was an adept. Ho rose, dipped, circled, turned corners and alighted .without trouble and without a mishap." "Well, well! Ho must have been a bird." ; "He was of the sparrow variety." I Pittrburb Post. ' 1 ' " '" j ! Appreciation. j "Sho has A good huxband," said I Mrs. rtabbletnn. "Hut oae got n divorce from him.". i "Ye Sho didn't know what a |