Show SAVED allom SUICIDE A I was coining out of tho san franchio co lico ono morning in alie year a tall dark skinned man placed himself in from of me and fixing ins intensely glittering eyes upon me said in an excited tone sir can you give ine a half hour of your time allis morning I replied if I can be of any to you ly so doing not hero but iii your office privately lio continued I must peak to and having heard you preach in alio church on pino street I felt I could approach you I nm in great trouble and danger and mut bpck to sonic oue lah manner was excited his hand trembled and lib eye had an insane gleam lio spoke ve walked on in silence until e approached my office in montgomery when ho hurriedly locked alio door on the in side saying as lio did so this is to bo private and I do not intend to bo interrupted As lio turned toward me I saw that ho had a in li is hand which lie bid on a deak and then eat down waited for him to speak eyeing him and alio pistol closely and feeling a little uncomfortable locked in thus with an armed madman of almost giant liko siy and strength you ever been haunted by alio idea of suicide he asked abruptly ills a glaring upon mo as ho gloko no not particularly answered but why do you ak because uio ideis is haunting me ho said in an agitated tone rising from his chair I have lain for two nights with cocked pistol in my hand calculating ho value of my life I bought alio pistol to mydell with and I wonder that I have not done it but something has held mo back what has put the idea of suicide into your mind I inquired my lifes a failure birj and is nothing left for lucli a fool an I have been ho eaid bitterly when a man lias no liopo left lie should die I wag making como reply when lie broke in hoar my history then tell mo if death ie not tho only thing left for me when lie told roe ids namo I reo J J it as that of a man of genus whose contribution to a certain popular periodical had given him a wide amo iu world of lott cra lie was tho son of a venerable new england bishop and graduate of harvard university I will avo am story i ilia own words as nearly na J can in 1850 I started for california honorable purpose and high ambition my father being a clergyman and poor and gro silly advanced in years I felt it was my duly to make provision for him and for the family circle to which I belonged animated by this purpose was full of liopo and energy on the ship taking me to california I mado the acquaintance and fell into of beautiful bill unprincipled for whom I toiled and eaarl ficca every for eight acara of weak iii and lolly nover a dollar to I intended to provide lor at libnic I enado immense eiline of money but it all went for but to extravagance and recklessness of my evil genius tortured by I rondo many struggles to arco myself from alio evil connection that blighted my life but all in vain when lifted alio shadow froin my path woman died and I wa free I fell new man hopes hat biad been smothered revived alado money and saved it making occasional remittances to the family at homo who enjoyed to libeer from me after so long and guilty a slen cc I had learned but now I resolved to quit it for two years cit tilia resolution and had in alio inpan timo iverc ove rC do you believe that the devil tempts men I wil tell you it i true I began to feel n desire my old haunts I yie klel and found mv way to i well known gambling liall where I lost every dollar of my hird earned money my self contempt was complete to roy I had somehow parted willi m man hood at well as my money tho next day aia ly alio of a lucrative position tian in a federal office in iiii franciaco Franci ico this wai not alio first coincidence of alie sort in y life unexpected influence had beon brought to bear upon my plans and prospects anew diorec tion has to dc with is it accident acci dont I took the place inch was t nio and went to work with renewed hope and energy made vow agnini gambling and determined to retail all I bad thrown aitay I saved wry dollar possible pinching m my living and iii liberal salary by literary luliona lu liora my biad again run up in the thousands and my gains s ady the frazor river mining broke out an old friend mine came and asked the loan of OJ to help him the new told him he should leayo and thit would leavo it ready for hint that afternoon after hr occurred to me was very poor outfit for ewh aai enterprise and that he ought it lieve then tho thought waa su posted yes sir it wae toil that I might take to a faro bank and win anollia hundred to in the hands t nn friedl frie nl I was fully resolved isk not cent beyond aliis wi miu m iu and after alternate buc cusses and losses at tho faro tabi it cikler in the usual way I lou the hundred dollars the old was again wild dot arflin aaion to break tho bank hold upon me I went aft freight betting recklessly until not a dollar was left this lat week can you nave od that ducro is no liopo for as weak a fool as I am now sir car lully don t ou think that the best ting can do is to blow out my brains said lie cocking the pistol lie spoke alio thought occurred to in that it was no uncommon thing for the suicidal to giro way to alio homicidal mania the man was half mad and ready for tragedy how old aro you I askco aiming to create a diversion I am 45 lio answered apparent ly brought to a little more recollection of himself by tho question I should think continued having arrested his attention that whatever may have been and however dark the fetui ron leave to face you havo too much manhood to sneak out of life the back door of suicide the cliot struck in an ini tanta change passed over his countenance suicide appeared to him in new ight as cowardly not a heroic act eliat wag all gone the suicide was but a poor creature weak us wll w ll as wicked he was saved you should bo ashamed of Bolf Bir I continued you are only aro almost ft giants strength a classical education beai lies experience and with a enow ledge of life by your mistakes that should bo a guarantee against alio possibility of their brave man should never give up the rattle lio bravest men never aavo up he aid quietly I will not act the part a coward you will bear mo again good morning I did hear from libin ogain II 11 went to british columbia ahoi lie prospered in business and pot lich and became a in the church of which his father of alie groat lights ho committed not but matrimony marrying sweet ind cultured english her eidl husband the hand and noblest of nien |