Show WITH I SHEARS AND PASTE HOP Her A woman clerk clork In a government office omco who enjoys n a well earned tation tILlon for or wit wlL put ono one over very err adroitly on a young attorney Sho announced that meho shortly short going I 1 J ki i l r I on her vacation nea lIan and anal the youthful cross examiner inquired the lady ladyn destination At was tho reply Whore Is that thal pursued d the tho attorney attorney ney no Al At tho UIO end of tho the line lino was the Iho smiling rejoinder Boston Record Mulligan and HUs Hu Money Mone Strolling along the board walk at I Atlantic City Mr ll Mulligan the tho i f iII wealthy retired contractor dropped a quarter through a n 1 crack In tho the plank plunk plankIng plunkIng Ing log A friend came along a minute later and found him squatted down Industriously poking a Il 2 bill through tho tilt treacherous cranny crann with his fore forefinger finger Anger Mulligan what hat tho the arre ar re yo ye 0 doln inquired the friend Sh h said Mr Mulligan Im try tr trIn in to ta make mako mal o It wort vort mo uno while to tear up uIt U this board b Maga Magazine zinc zine Ha Friends to Blame And why are aro you rou here my poor poorman man asked the tho parson pardon Ive got gol mo too friends t blame blamo fer for forit ferIt ferit it answered convict 1323 32 Why Wh how la is that queried qu tho the parson Do De Judge said It was do du chair for or mine but mo ma friends s got an had de sentence changed t Imprisonment for fat life Chicago News Strong on Length Richard Carlo Carle lately In engaged n us as a cook a Swedish giantess who proved unsatisfactory On departure she asked for a 0 written testimonial and Mr Carle presented her with the fol tot following followIng lowing I To Ta whom It may concern I T havo o lately had In my mr employ Hulda Swan Swanson Swanson son who was engaged on agod to cook for or a family of or three and do such things as CUI would be bo possible whet when not cook coo Ing Under this head might come came a little dusting and dishwashing and ami answering tho the door boll bell Taking all these things Into account I J wish to toBay say Bay that Hulda is absolutely the tall ORt eat cook I over saw s Maga Magazine Magazino zine zino His Mark Ono One day dR a n big lg city bunk bank received the tho following message from rom one of Its country respondents correspondents coi Pay Par 25 to John Jahn Smith who wha will call today Tho The cashiers curiosity became b suspicious auspicious when a cabman assisted Into Info the tho bank bane banka baneR a R drunken fare arc who shouted that hp he was John Smith and wanted some somo money mone Two clerks pushed pulled polled and piloted tho the boisterous Individual 1 41 Jj i l Into a private room away from the sight and anti hearing ol el 0 regular deposit depositors ors Tho The cashier wired the country hank bank bankMan Man lIan claiming to lo bo ho John Smith IR is II here Highly Intoxicated Shall wo we await awall Identification Tho The answer answer read Identification I complete Pay Par the tho money Success Magazine Not So Stingy Slater Sister Jane Jan lingered with the tho or at nt tho the front frant door but bill at last the tho i visitor went and Jano Jane tripped lightly up to her room humming I softly and Kindly gladly to herself She want wanted ed cd to t bo be alone to think over all the nico things tho the visitor had hud said Little lames James aged 7 entered the sitting room slowly and thoughtfully Mamma ho said sisters now new beau henu as ns t stingy sting as I J thought ho he was he dear Well WeB Im glad to ta hear it answered his mother molher No said Brother Brother James hes hos he s stingier Answers Not a I Matter of Money Moncy Stern Parent Im afraid orald that young oung min man Is mercenary Tile Tho ho Daughter Oh no ho bo papa Stern Parent But he ho knows known 1 I am worth two mil Ions he ho heThe The Tho Daughter Yes of or course courso but ho says sas ho llo would love loc mo me Just as much if you jou were worth woith only a u mil million million million lion and a half Chicago News Ho He Trades Obstreperous Paternal Parent Bob Dab Is Unit that young man who calls on your sister a n plumber Young Bob Yes sir lies hes a plum plumber plumber plumber ber and an nn electrician to boot book 0 O P P PIs Is Itt he hc Well Ill remain remember rem om ber the last part whon ho be calls calla again Exchange |