Show Dorothy Dix Talks AFTER YOURE YOU'RE GROWN DONT DON'T OVERDO YOUR DUTY TO YOUR MOTHER BY UPROOTING HER FROM HER OLD HOME AND TRANSPLANTING HER IN YOURS WHERE SHE'S JUST A VISITOR WITH NOTHING TO TODO TODO TODO DO BUT BE BOSSED WHEN WHEN I hear mothers complaining that their children neglect them I In ITi n Ti think that perhaps they are arc not so badly off ot as they think we wo are said a whimsical old lady to me the tho other day I speak with feeling on the subject for I J myself am the victim of three devoted daughters who in their desire to do their duty to me almost boss mo me to i r death in Of course I know that their tyranny Is Inspired by their affection and their sincere I desire desiro for my well being and I try to bear it itI I with humility and fortitude But believe me me there are few more painful experiences in life than being pecked chicken and so there are times when I actually envy the mothers who have ungrateful children and let them alone and who go their ways and let her go hers r- r k Now I am n Infirm In body nor riot senile In mind and I still possess 4 4 all of my faculties I am quite as j. j capable of getting around and attend attend- attending attending ing to my own affairs and making my myown DOROTHY DIX own decisions a s 8 I was In the days when my daughters were children and had to look to mother for fop everything and obey her But the shoe ahoe Is on the other foot now and Its It's mother who has to mind and do at as she Is told to And I dont don't like It it I dont don't like being treated like a moron who hasn't intelligence enough to take care of herself and who has to have some kindly wise person direct her every move move- ment mente POSITIVELY pOSITIvELY there are times when I have to bite my y tongue nearly I off to keep from screaming with exasperation when I hear my af af- affectionate affectionate a- a mentors say for the millionth time Mother hadn't you bet betS better ter move out of that draft drat l' l Mother dont dOlt you think you had better go and He Ue down and take a little nap now Mother dont don't you think you are drinking your coffee too strong Mother Iother do you rou really think you should eat steak for dinner I. I My lly children do not realize that they are offering me a Insult by suggesting that I have grown so minded feeble that I do not know whether I am hot or cold or when I am tired or what food agrees with me and so I swallow my resentment and smile sweetly to hide my rage But let me mo tell you it takes the patience of Job to enable the old to endure the Incessant nagging of the young I ii 1 am bored to extinction because I have nothing to do For forty years I was a breathlessly busy woman Running a house Rearing a family Managing servants Cooking Sewing Nursing Managing Contriving ways and means Launching daughters In society Getting them married All of the myriad responsibilities responsibilities and activities that fill a competent wife and mothers mother's hands Now I have nothing to do Nothing to plan for Noth Noth- Nothing Nothing ing to look forward to Nothing to do but to kill time WHEN my husband died my dear good dutiful daughters snatched n VI me out of my old home while I was so grief bewildered and I did not realize what they were ere doing Mother has worked long enough Mother must rest and take things easy the remainder remander of her life Moth Mother Mother er must let l t us cherish and comfort her and take care of her now and repay her for her devotion to us they said So they sold the old house to which I had gone as a bride and where all the happy years of my married life had been spent and sold the old furniture that was not furniture to me but memories and they took me away from my old friends and associations to the cities in which they lived and turned me Into a perpetual guest which is the most strenuous and wearing career on earth FOR I have no home I am Just a visitor and must always me on my Ps P's I and Qs Q's not to interfere with any of the tho arrangements ot or the house houseIn In which I am staying I must make a constant effort to be agreeable and pleasant as that is the only way in which I can pay my board I have no friends only friends only acquaintances among people of my daughters' daughters age and when I am asked out to dinner or lunch it is only a courtesy to Marys Mary's or Janes Jane's or Sallys Sally's mother not because I am personally de do- sired My daughters are filled with self righteous satisfaction and they think how good they are to mother They pat themselves on the back when they reflect that mother has not been left lonely In the old home where she ehe he would have to worry with Incompetent help and have the burden of housekeeping on her I haven't the heart to tell them how much happier I would have been If they would have only left me In my old home among my old friends with plenty of work to do still my devoted daughters have not left me a vestige of ot per per- peril personal il TV independence I have to give an account for my y every act and before I can do the simplest thing a family council has bas to sit upon it Last summer I hed planned to go to Europe with a friend and all allour allour alLour our arrangements had been made but at the last minute I had to give gh-e It up because my daughters were so worried for fear something would happen to me I suppose they felt they couldn't trust me not to fall over the rail of the boat or that I would get lost in Paris or London LondonI I cant can't get a letter without their th ir wanting to know who It ItIs ItIs itIs Is from I cant can't c make a visit without telling where I am going and just when Ill I'll be home I am not even permitted to go godown godown godown down town by myself I have to walt wait until one of the girls finds it convenient to go with me and decency forbids me telling them that I want to go alone and I am fed up on daughters and arid desire to go out by myself and do the things that I want to todo todo todo do Instead of the things that they think I should do doAND AND AND my roy daughters pick out my clothes for me ce e. e Its It's been years since A It I had the privilege of consulting my own preference in the matter of hats and dresses I always exemplify in my appearance the taste of the particular daughter with whom I am staying and little as they suspect it I consider myself a martyr because I have to wear the blacks and grays gras that my girls pick out for me Instead of the cheerful blues and pinks for tor which I yearn People always say to me How blessed you are In having such devoted daughters I and I respond properly Oh yes when Inwardly I am thinking that there are no greater despots on earth than our children who love us and try to manage us for our own good With the best Intentions In the world they make our lives a I burden to us And that's why I sometimes envy the neglected mothers DOROTHY DIX Copyright by Public Ledger |