Show I L Dorothy orothy D rothy Dix Dixs Dix's s 's s Letter Box I SHOULD A FATHER WASTE THE MONEY BY SENDING HIS EN EN- ENGAGED ENGAGED DAUGHTER TO COLLEGE WHY THIS SUCCESSFUL OFFICE WORKER SHOULD CONTINUE HER JOB AFTER MARRIAGE THE GIRL WHO WED A MARRIED MAN DEAR flEAR MISS DIX DIX I I am coo a girl of o 19 10 and finished high school In June JJ I J am engaged to a n boy who Is a freshman in college anti and ho he wants us to bo ho secretly married and both go on to college But hero here Is my m pooh problem lem My parents are willing to send me to college If It I will make something of my education tion after I get It teach It-teach teach or do something like A T that that but but they say they do not want to waste any money on it iti if t I 1 am going to get et married as soon as I get my degree BELLE Answer 5 Dont Don't get married secretly Belle Dont Don't marry any man until he Is ha In hn a position to acknowledge you as his hisAk Ak wife and to marry you openly and de decently de- de I In Irs the sight of all au men No good ever comes of a secret marriage and It always leaves leave the f girls girl's reputation bedraggled This Is II Isa IIa e. 4 VI a suspicious world my dear and It al always al ai- 5 C iI ways looks askance at a belated mar marS marriage g certificate DOROTHY DIX OIX A. A If It ItOU you OU and your our sweetheart get married secretly and go off to college together It is not possible for you to avoid gossip so either put off orr your marriage altogether until you have havo finished college or else elso be frankly married The hole corner bus busi business busness ness and meeting around for or stolen rendezvous will do neither one of ot you any good Besides the situation situa lon will be filled with complications that will give food for jealousy as you will be b expected to join In Inthe Inthe Inthe the social activities of the school and If you have dates with boys and your husband has dates with girls the green eyed monster monter will hove have a fine opportunity of getting In his deadly work Th bo o I should strongly urge you to put wedding day until after you have finished school There are many married couples couples' in the tho co educational co-educational schools and the teachers report that they do good work However this Is largely a matter for your parents to decide as you have no means of ot making a living and are dependent upon them for support Certainly it seems to me that matrimony is for grownups and not school girls and boys bors and that a man should not ask a woman to marry him secretly or other other- otherwise otherwise wise until he Is able to stand on his own ow-n feet and support a family I think that your father Is mistaken In his Idea that there is no use in educating a girl If she Is going to get married To Tobe Tobe Tobe be be bea a good wife and mother is the most complicated profession In the world and md one that requires a liberal education in every direction And then some Certainly the woman who must wrestle with the high cost of ot living and budget her Income incense to the last penny needs to be a n mathematician and anti a political economist Certainly the woman who brings children Into the world should have a knowledge of o biology and physiology and hygiene and a speaking acquaintance with the germ theory Certainly the woman who cooks should have more than an elementary knowledge of ot chemistry Certainly the woman who must roust deal with the moods and tenses of ot a man should be a psychologist And the woman who must spent much ot Of o her time lime alono aono should have a n cultivated mind and be a areader areader areader reader so that she nay may never be lonely lonelY and and so on Furthermore marriage does not riot automatically settle all of ofa ofa a womans woman's problems and assure her of plenty plent and as long as she lives Sometimes husbands die leaving wives with witha a house full of little children to support Sometimes husbands get sick lck and an cannot work and their wives have to step into the breach and take care of them Sometimes marriages turn turnout turnout turnout out badly and women are forced to divorce their husbands Sometimes men are arc just plain lazy and account no-account and cant can't make a living Many a married woman has ten times the th necessity of knowing how to make a living than a girl has and any father who doesn't provide his daughter against such a con con- contingency contingency falls In his duty to her DOROTHY DIX DEAR flEAR MISS DIX I DIX I am engaged to be married and my problem is h isI I whether or not to continue working after alter marriage I have bave a re re- responsible responsible re- re responsible job that of handling stocks storks and bonds for or a big house I enjoy this work cork Intensely but my fiancee does not believe In his wife working outside the home homo I enjoy housework ork to a certain extent but cannot imagine doing nothing else for a n lifetime and I feel that hat it ft I Ican Ican Ican can work after atter marriage it will HI help us to put away something for a n anest anest nest egg What would woul 1 you advise ENGAGED OFFICE WORKER Answer The only definite advice I can give is to settle the matter before you get married one way or the other Dont Don't leave It as asa asa asa a bone of contention to fight over after you are arc married Cut no outsider can settle the matter for you because It ItIs ItIs itIs Is one absolutely of personal Inclination and the trouble with it is that you are both right from your Individual viewpoints vi It Is j easy to see why a woman who has a lucrative job doing the kind of o work that interests her ber and that she likes to do doesn't want to give It up to go into a n. kitchen to do menial work that is distasteful to her and for which she will receive no money Also why she should be loath to give Ive up the good pay envelope to which she has bas been boon accustomed accustomed tomed and that enabled her ber to have luxuries that she will have to do without Not every woman Is born with domestic tastes any more mora than every man Is born with a taste for carpentry or brick brick- laying Girls Inherit from their fathers and many a daughter of a good business man is born with her fathers father's passion for trade and his talent for it and she Is never really happy outside of a store or office Business is in her blood and she is never content to be just a housewife I knew a woman of ot this sort who had held beld a big position for or years She got married and gave up her job and I asked her later it If she sho were satisfied She Sho shrugged her shoulders and replied I love my husband but for me to run a little apartment Is like put putting putting ting a n thousand horsepower engine to do a two-horsepower two Job And frankly frankl I am bored stiff stitt So that is that side of the question The other Is that the man marries a wife and not another business man and you cant can't wonder that when he comes cemes home at night he wants to be met by the traditional pink bungalow wife wile or one who Is fresh trash and rested Instead of one who has been hard at work all day In an office I think that your fiance will be wise however to let you go on with your job because you will be a restless dissatisfied fied fled woman hard to live with If he tries to Imprison you in a two four flat DOROTHY DIX DEAR flEAR MISS DIX I I married a traveling man who represented himself I to me to be single and wealthy wealth I have found out that he lie has a wife wIre from whom he lie Is not divorced and children How can I get out ot of this mess moss without any an scandal or anybody knowing about It A Answer You cant can't have a marriage annulled without Its being bing known but no scandal will attach to you as you are arc the Inno Inno- Innocent Innocent Innocent cent party Why Vl y did you marry a man without taking the trou trouble ble to investigate his past It seems to me that you have brought your trouble down on your own head Marriage Is the most important act of a persons person's life and yet men and women enter into it with less consideration than they would give to buying a new dress or a police pollee dog DOROTHY DIX I Copyright by Public Ledger |