Show Bridge Fought Not Played I I I z Brains for Poker Golf Golf No No r I w J PJ i I I 6 I AU ott I Oi 7 M I I I t 1107 11 cI By Stif X S Copyright 1 C N New w York Torl Trib Tribune une Inc I I r WISH you'd learn to playA play A 1 bridge remarks the misses Inhales What bat for I 1 demands So to we w could gO ro caling on some lomo nice people once In a II white while comes back the frau frail Th Yeh I sn sneers ers I 1 suppose you cant can't call on nic nice people nowadayS unless you lot got ot a 8 deck of cards In one hand and a II carafe 0 of gin ein In In Inthe inthe Inthe the oth other r Anyway brIdge Is la the tho bunk What do you know about it sniffs Kate lye IVe Iv watched enough enouch h games games I tolls her to find out that It Aint nothing but a a cross between II a family row and a katte klatch Bill hasn't been talking to his wife wire since that game they halt had over o at the th Murphys Murphy's three dAYS ago ngo The way h he acts acte In a tame game comes comell back hack the th Indignant I I X dont don't blAme blam Molly tolly for tor pot not talk talk- log Inc to him for tor a month He yelps wh when n she sho bids bide and also when whon she doesn't bid Bill Dill teems seems to have havethe havethe havethe the l Idea ea that his wife should I bo be beable able to talk spots on the th cards I dont don't know about her talk talk- talkIng talkIng Ing spots on the cards card t I remarks but nhe he can certainly talk spats Into them Ive I've never seen those folks In a game came that didn't fInish hup up with her throwing mud mud mud-at a at hl hi relations and him heaving rocks up tip tree e tol 1 me meat meat m mat at lunch today he was going colne to quit playing bridge with Ith the tho wife Getting tired of ot b being a 1 rowdy Is he be Inquires the frau No I returns hes getting tired ot of o forking up for perfume He tells me It sets him back ten bucks buck for a a bottle after every bridge o game Barne What Is there thero about this Indoor sport that Causes S folks that are ard KO MO with each other oth- oth otherwise oth otherwise to claw at Vh ch other throats Ive I've seen a x lot ot of couples playing p und spit spit-in spit ocean tIle and other games like that and stilt be b on speaking terms at the end and nd ot of o the evening e Why Why- V BrIdge cuts In the misses IS isa a game came 0 of partners and that's that'll wh where re the tho trouble comes In In poker you lose lo e your own moneY And any bull you make mak comes out ot of your our own pocket In bridge your partner cnn can ruin you Just by forgetting that the three of clubs hasn't been played yet et r Yeh Teh h say eay says I and slid still you want me to learn a It game cm e that will mak snake trouble between us ua u You got cot to take tak that chance chanco 1 comes back hack Hats I All the tho swell people play the th game nowadays and It you dont don't you OU not got as much social stand standing In A as an Alabama cot cot- cotton cot cotton ton pl er at sI a 8 J Ku u Klux house hou e warning Im I'm going to teach you ou youth the game Kame K me No youre you're your not I growls Im wilting willing to keel keep my social stand stand- tar d Ing In my wife's name namo I Ilk Beside I like games fames gam that take a alUe little lUe brains brain to play Dont you OU think bridge bride taku brains asks the mines misses Not from front what e 1 Iv seen en ot of It ItI I tells letle her It If you get tet et the th papers d dealt alt to you you win It If you ou lont dont get ret em cm you dig dl Whores Whore's the tho skill come In getting a bunch or of aces kings and que queens ns handed banded to 10 you ou providing the th docks dock's deck honest hone t You got cot to have hav the th cards carde In any game dont don't you OU returns tho i u fra-u frau Row How man many different and as as- as assorted assorted sorted kinds of brains does It t take ke taketo keto to play poker It If you set get et three aces ace dealt to you you beat a man with two queens queene dont don't you Not In the th kind ot of poker wo we play at club I assures her Ive seen a a pair of deuces deuce win a a hun hun- hundred dred dollar pot from a pat straight three jacks and two big pair How was thaU that asks ark Kato Kate SImple enough I replies We were playing table labi stAkes stake and the theman theman man with the two deuces deuce stood too pat and bet out 46 Everybody sot got cold feet and dropped thur th l hands That luck sniffs the th frau Where do the th brains brain como come corn In InThey They come conio ome In plenty Ire I ye- ye returns turns The Th fh bird with the tho pair of o ducks had to figure that he be h was wall sitting In th the right richt place end and also allo he h had to dope dolo out how the tho guy guv with the would act against sala A big bin bet That's what they call physiology Just Just the th a same B me remarks the wife ther there Is la one on good food rea reason eon why It cant can't possibly take tako tak brains to play poker that I bites The fact tact ahe sh he exclaims thAt you can play lay It and win pretty prelly Listen says y I 1 Did It ever occur to you OU that some th the stupid stupid- stupidest stupidest e est t women In ho the world are arc ar the tho best beet bridge players Take Tak Mollie That woman hasn't lene enough enough to pour water out of ft It pitcher r but she's ehe's dh the best hest player In your mob moh Isn't lent the she Yes Yea admits Kate but but The Th point I is Is I 1 goes o on that being good food at cards Is la Just k a knock and has hila ha nothing whatever to do 10 with brains The Th same me sam goes coe oes for formost formost most moet pastimes You hear em cm talk talkIng talk talk- In Ing n about it 1 a brainy golf rolt Theres There's no such animal The Th b beat st golf golt players player In the tho world lire are ar ex cx caddie ex-caddie caddies that were thrown out of kindergarten and All as much liS as three dollars It a week eek at t i anything else ele Good golf colt G lt playing Is knack combined with practice and the biggest brain In the th world arId wouldn't help you ou to sink Ink II a a 10 yard ard putt Brains Drains wouldn't hurt you any In Inthe inthe the game gamo ram would It inquires Inquire Kate Ite It you also Iao had the th knack Anthe and An the th pratt ce pr It If you OU had brains enough nough to toto todo do to anything el clio cite o I 1 replies you wouldn't be able to keep It long enough on card cards and golf roll to dovery do dovery dovery very well vell at lit either ot of cm tm It must bo ho terrible remarks lar the misses not to have no relI regu- regu regular lar brains and no card rd sense either Awful I ren as-ren trees Yet goes roc on on the wife wIre you oem to be b happy Are Ar you trying to Insult met me 1 I yelps Im not trying backs down the misses Iv Ive heard that talk the she goeS on about folks folka with card Ben sense e not havIng any other kind ot of sense senile but Its It's silly Some Somo of the he brightest lAwyers lawyer and doctors In town are wonderful bridge bride pia play play- play play-cr tra Cr arent aren't they And some of the heads hoade of ot tho the biggest e t corporations corporation In the country are oro grand golf players ar arent aren't nt they Some Som of o em art are good food I 1 ad admits mite mits mil but who ore are the tho th guys that write the tho books about bridge fix up tho the rules rilles forthe game Kame Did you ever hear ot of o em cm doing any any- anything thing else Who wins the th big bit golf olt Arent Aren't th they y mostly ex en- en caddies j i end ond B I club ik professIonals professionals all right comes coms back the frau Those rhose men have made mad a profusion profession of at those things What a profession teaching a alot alot alot lot of ot headed fat old hento play bridge e must mUt be I J sneers Incera with It wrong the wife People have got cot to amuse and what's ter terrible about showing em how to amuse themselves properly Nothing I 1 agrees but If you call battles between husband and wife and the spreading of andal between en deals deall deal amusing 3 rolf properly youre you're cuckoo What hat Is your our Idea Ido of ot proper om asks the th frau Talking to you ou darling I Itell tells her Ah yes sighs sl hs V Kate hat ono one mans man's food tood Is another man mans man's poon |