Show DUMMY A a litter to ahn Y herald one of alo curiosities of office seeking crankiness is exhibited in the following letter written in good faith to the new york herald herald I 1 think it my duty to make a singular revelation to the american public and buo ouo chich I 1 am confident will alonsa the indignation of the whole american people and especially of alie loyal members of the republican party in ember it was generally believed that we the republicans elected a president on alie aih of march we inaugurated him in his inaugural message he specifically invited gentlemen of his parly who desired to serve the nation to como addeo andeo him and since then a largo number of lie fit and proper men loyal and zealous republicans by whose unsparing use of voice pen and money lie was elected bavo taken him at his word and or without members of congress and senators as the case might be have waited upon him to ask for the just reward of our elloris and services I 1 was in washington since the ard 3rd of march until the other day when I 1 learned eoma thing that caused roc to como home disgusted dig as well as disappointed I 1 attended at the white house daily during a great part of the time I 1 have carefully and anxiously batched what has gone on there and have on several occasions sought to address our president concerning the place I 1 have in view aud which my member of congress has assured me of bis own knowledge I 1 deserve and ought to have sir in common with may I 1 say a great of fellow sufferers I 1 have so far been ignominiously thwarted in roy efforts for justice I 1 have distend day after day to their appeals I 1 have heard expressions ol 01 disappointment with mr biar rison their unanimous testimony corroborated my ofin experience mr listens in absolute eilenne and with propound lack of interest his ees wander about the room while a gallant worker of the party respectfully respect tully but earnestly solicits his due reward and while his senator or representative corroborates bis statements and tries to impress upon the chief magistrate the importance of the man and the expediency nay the necessity of providing for him or recognizing ais services MANY inane CATEGORY I 1 appeal to any one of the many thousand who have passed through this ordeal since the aih of march whether I 1 am bot describing th scene accurately the president whim our belf sacrificing and patriotic cuorts placed in his elevated position does not even look at us ilia eyes wander up to the ceiling as though lie were searching fur a stray cobweb lie looks cold almost unconcerned you would think from his manner that he was bored actually bored sir no word of encouragement passes his lips when the case has been duly and faithfully represented to him by tho applicant and by his in fluence the president dismisses both or all as the cabo may be with three stereotyped phrases 1 I have heard all you have eaid and will try to bear it in mind but I 1 am not now prepared to say anything or 1 I regret that 1 cannot at this time hear you further upon this matter but will consider it or 1 I have not yet had opportunity to consider the question you have raised but chopo to give it my shortly these I 1 appeal to rny fellow ap canta are tho precise phrases uniformly used that they are un 1 am sure you will admit OP A SECRET but bir I 1 have not watched in vain I 1 have discovered the secret the hidden mystery the milk in the cocoanut coco anut so to speak I 1 denounce the whole thing as a fraud I 1 have seen that which I 1 have seen and I 1 do not intend to ba silent sir mr editor it is a fraud it is not the president who daily gives audience to hundreds of earnest party workers and their friends I 1 know what I 1 know mr harrison is a shrewd a cunning an unscrupulous man he has deceived us he has trifled with the hollest holiest feelings of thousand of republicans public ans as good as himself he has set up a dummy to give audience as the snobbish say to hear us who canao to him for jus rewards of our loyal and patriotic efforts sir I 1 know the man I 1 met him two evenings ago in well aa a respectable and quiet place of public entertainment he wae consuming a gin toddy after as he told mea very exhausting days work I 1 noticed at once his resemblance to mr harridon Harri aon short thin balew and palo of complesi ion nae eyes beard and wrinkled face all the president over again so that I 1 was startled for a moment thinking that mr harrison ft as perhaps the secret victim af the gin toddy habit I 1 eat down by thia amazing counterfeit ot our president and adroitly drew from him his secret THE sir it is this person this counterfeit this pretender who daily goes into the white house by the back clairs flairs puts on a suit of the presidents clothes takes his place in the reception room and hears all our reque ata appeals and entreaties and those of our members of congress and influential friend for five houra at a liuio ive had to listen tn hundreds of these infernal boer tins wretch confessed to roe and its enough to make a man tired of his life all the rot I 1 have to hear about party services and extreme importance and absolute necessity lion and 11 ll that you ba hieye if I 1 tried to tell you but hank the lord I 1 dont remember anything they eay 1 dont bear them half the time I 1 just bear enough to juipe julpe which of the three replies I 1 have got by heart will fit ali 13 best and then I 1 think of something more interesting when tie drone of voices ceases I 1 malto my prearranged answer and cal the next I 1 can tell you im happy when the closing time comes and cabinet days aro BO short that I 1 wish lo 10 my every day was a cabinet daiy diy do you pet pay for this I 1 asked with difficulty concealing my indignation and contempt far the villain what do you take me foi he said with a sneer two lynndred linn dred dollars a month and my grub in the is little enough for that work im ack of it once the president baa raised my a wire gentleman and considerate and begged me for heavens sake not to leave him in the lurch but im sick of the job these fellows would kill a mule with their everlasting gabble about the importance of giving them I 1 told the president tb other day that no money would buy me to hold on much longer he begged me to hold on a little longer the liot weather was coming he said and would drive them out he bad beard reports that the cholera would break out here soon and that would drive them away but I 1 think he was deceiving me I 1 dont hear of any cholera HIS excellency AT III 8 EASE and where is his excellency while you are so ably personating him I 1 asked oh said this creature with a grin his excellency as you call him is all right hes off in n far corner of the house playing with baby mckee or seeing cabinet officers on business if them fellows what bore roe BO only knew what a good timo his excellency was having while they are shooting off their mouth at me here the blackguard burst into a drunken laugh and demanded another glass of gin sir mr editor what I 1 am writing to you is true the president with a perfidy beyond the experience or imagination of man has gut a dummy to receive us in his place this dummy is a gin drinking miscreant who has got parrot like a few stale sentences be flings at us the loyal servants of the party it is to this creature that the ingrate harrison has been forcing us to ever since the lib ot march while bo harrison amuses himself or sees cabinet officers on business it is intolerable it is an indignity for which he ought to be impeached As this dummy too tipsy to walk toward his took my arm be whispered to me dont give it away I 1 tell it to you roy 1 fiend aa a dead secret windom and noble lave got dummies too and kera look log for one what arc we coming to in thi so called land of liberty we might as well have civil service reform at once the whole thing is a humbug and fraud yours respectfully JONAS 1625 pennsylvania avenue washington may A nama for the baly II 11 C didgo in detroit free press from the list of names you roa be can get one ti please the baby agues celia adelaide anna blanche agatha constance hannah barbara phaebe elizibeth mabel frances hebe caroline catherine eva cora Carien nc beatrice lilly flora augusta dorothy corria dorria helen grace louise lettice georgia gertrude ruth julia rosalie arabella lucy winnifred portia laura eloise prudence patience clara myra myrtle amny malvina amanda enid rose sabina antoinette rosalind ann come lia rosamond nanette joan cordelia mary margaret edith ida penelope emma aleen ada johanna ophelia olivia jane regina sarah sophia elaina harriet louisa kate alvira pauline paulina lucinda almira II ypatia eunice henrietta Eup heroia sybil charlotte millicent maud matilda theresa adelaide pearl clotilda marion miriam josephine victoria florence imogine Imog cne virginia magdaline isabella eliza isabel cinderella felicia alice gladys bertha eleanor ursula clarissa martha juliet adelina venus amelia georgianna rosamond violet adelia daisy ethel bridget annie eve eliza CI otilde fanny angelica mercy angelina nancy gwendolyn christina arnold anthony peter paul christopher isaac hobart t aul clement conrad david silas dennis richard francis cyru edmund edward george adolphus edgar edwin luke augustu ferdinand henry harry ru dolab julian julius gerald adolpa hiram ebner kanneth giles nathan ruben percy miles frederick everard felis justin eustace earnest evan austin owen grover victor gregory hilary jacob hector francis elijah benjamin thomas aiphonso alexander william morris augustus samuel abraham abram arthur alfred albert adam matthew mark mathias john columbus cyril jonathan basil robert thaddeus horace raphael simon asa maurice timothy solomon eau lewis goddard harold luca jasper joseph allan ellas jonah titus hugh tobias roderick charles theobald herman roger roland rodney aaron sebastian stephen guy cornelius theobore Theo Jore tracy kalab lu jacob james jerome job geoffrey reginald philip raymond humphrey walter reynold randall joshua randolph michael eau patrick philebert lucian an drew leonard orville frank bartholomew nicholas oliver martin godfrey manuel daniel eben eugene ebenezer aaron elhel bert simon gilbert dubeil herbert in the barm lagow there loos e in turkey some plot or other lias been dia covered and the consequences are being ecca in a number of mysterious arrests andl in wholesale measures of punishment against the pram the times has been three jimca confiscated within a tn and the daily chronicle lias been interdicted interdict ed al together fact appears to bo that a serio iia conspiracy fur depositing the sultan was detected in the very nick of tine the sultan was so unnerved by the discovery that bo sent for sir william while and asked fur his advice sir william thai the sultan could only live in safety if bo put down his baren seeing that it waa impossible to exercise supervision over an establishment of badiea the sultan who 13 practically a monogamist would be glad enough to get rid of his brevet spouses but thy customs of h n dynasty forbid him to do this on his birthday and on twenty other days in the year he invariably receives from his mother the present ot a beautiful slave and this young lady has forthwith to bo transferred to bai establishment in the capacity of harem dame with a household ot her own consisting of at least four eunuchs and six female servants to bay nothing of horses carriages and grooms multiply the number of these households by and it ceases to bo astonishing that the expenditure oatlie sultans civil list should amount to pounds a year A largo item in this sum the dolera which the sultan pays to his slaves when he marries them to favorite officials about one hundred birli are married from the palace yearly and each of them is entitled er titled to re ceide pound unfortunately the bridegroom who takes a vito from the sultana hands mut a his present of a lave to keep tho of the imperial seraglio up to ltd proper figu re the bullan alio llio whole thing but what is ho to do there aro too many tested interest caged in keeping the imperial harem supplied ith wives and if the sultan were to cashier his entire feniolo establish he would certainly be deposed or murdered sir william whito is eaid to have advised his majesty to reduce his establishment by not filling up tho vacancies but this is not easy seeing that every cabinet minister and pacha of note looks to passing his daughter through the sultans harem us a means of securing her a marriage portion with the title of valide which may be constructed as princess the man who would come to the throne if abdul hamid were deposed is his brother iechad pacha this iechad is virtually a prisoner in yildiz kiosk fur he cannot go outside fie garden rates without leave tanil he never gus to take a walk or he must alwain lia by guards icil eunuchs eu nuche Ite chad id nt modem ideal and lately he iu love with an engleh girl whom he met boating on the tw honi bo proposed marriage after ft weeks acquaintanceship the baltan hearing of this affair has nipped his hi others suit in the bud by ordering the young lady to leave constantinople |