| Show Home Front Isn't So Safe Either Here Are Oddest I Of Ms Fr Freak ak Accidents and Narrow Escapes I Caprices o of Fate ate Injure Some Leave Others Wholly ho Unscathed By PAUL JONES As you may have begun to suspect suspect suspect sus sus- wartime days are wacky days days- People stand patiently in line for two hours to get a pack of cigarettes and then blow their tops if they miss one section of a revolving door on the way back to work Guys who never could stand bananas now howl their heads off because they cant can't get them The laundry eventually sends back the right buttons but buti i the shirts are missing Maids who used to have one night out i now allow the lady of the house II to have one night in A customer is publicly commended for slugging slugging slug slug- ging a waitress who said Don cha know theres there's a war on You would think then that the annual crop of wacky accidents would have been even wackier in inthe inthe inthe the wartime year of 1944 And you would be right They were A roundup round round- up by the National Safety council proves that an amazing number of people still patronize the Whack market in accidents To wit As year two year two old Margaret Morton of Groton Conn lay sleeping in her home one October night a navy plane plowed through her bedroom and whisked the blanket off her bed without touching her The plane planeD planel D l J L J zoomed through the other wall wan of the he house and eventually crashed into nto a schoolhouse W. W J. J McCarthy of Toledo Ohio pilot of the he fighter plane was injured only slightly The blanket undamaged was found in the wreckage of the plane As an enthusiastic fc Ernest Olivier of McCook Neb Jeb often orten had been sent by a ahot ahot hot tot tune But never as literally as ashe the he evening he spun in a super maneuver grabbed for his pretty jiving iving partners partner's hand missed and plunged through the story second-story window of the dance hall Nine persons riding cozily in an automobile driven by Mrs Adaline Clasby of Winslow Ariz were injured inured in in- j red slightly when the car crashed into nto the rear of a bus that that- had stopped to discharge a passenger Mrs Clasby readily explained the accident I HI failed to see the bus in time to stop she said because I Iwas Iwas Iwas was nursing my baby Shot by La Lawnmower When Charles Smith came home to Claudell Kan to recuperate recuperate recuperate re re- re- re from wounds received in three south Pacific invasions he figured figured figured fig fig- he would get some rest from dodging shrapnel But as he watched a power lawnmower at work in his front yard the darn thing hing picked up an old spoon and hurled it with such power and accuracy accuracy accuracy ac ac- ac- ac curacy that it penetrated the calf of Private Smiths Smith's leg and had to be removed by an operation Its the same wherever you go Private Smith remarked glumly at the hos hos- pital Harley Paul Collins of Kansas Kansas Kansas Kan Kan- sas City Kan knows exactly how Private Smith felt For Private Collins Collins Collins Col Col- lins home on furlough was showing showing showing show show- ing his wife how the boys make booby traps over there lie He hooked up a sh sh lI a board a nail and a apiece apiece apiece piece of wire Then he tripped and the homemade contraption went off ofT and shot him in the leg Paul Lewchick of C Coaldale Pa knows that prudent people lay in a supply of coal every year But he believes few of them do it as literally literally literally liter liter- ally as he did He lay in and in-and and under 13 13 tons of it when he and his car were buried beneath the contents of ofa ofa a coal truck that upset in a near collision with Lewchick's car Dug Dugout Dugout Dugout out after hard work Lewchick nursed only minor cuts and bruises and refrained manfully from explaining explaining explaining ex ex- that it was soft coal At least three persons in the United States now take seriously the expression Id break brenk my neck to todo todo todo do that One is Gregory 13 of Chicago who put his football jerr jerIT jersey jer- jer r b. b 11 1 I IT I 1 i f I 1 ti J r rr yr S 0 J f r II J I l 1 a asey t sey on backwards in his haste to dress for a game tugged fiercely to get it off off and and broke his neck Anne Haldeman 10 of Doylestown Pa snapped a vertebra in her neck while skipping rope And Mrs Pauline Strother of Indianapolis topped them both by dislocating a vertebra in her neck while vigorously vigorously vigorously vigor vigor- brushing her teeth 1 I All re re- re- re covered Closely akin to the neck-breakers neck was Mrs James Gallagher of West Hazelton Pa who arose so hurriedly hurriedly hurriedly hur hur- to shut off an n insistent alarm clock that dislocated her spine By Remote Control The Woodrow Andersons of the St. St Louis Andersons are careful folk So when Mr Anderson got back from a hunting trip he placed his rifle on a kitchen shelf out of reach of the Anderson children Equally cautious Mrs Anderson took all the arrows away from year old Donald before leaving the house to visit a neighbor But Don still had the bow So he merely substituted a yardstick for an arrow and let it fly from the back porch toward the kitchen The yardstick went through a hole in the screen door and struck the trigger of the rifle The rifle went off and the bullet struck Dons Don's little sister Darlene I A good time was wa had by all but I the driver when a grocery grocer truck u up up- upI I set in Bloomington Ca Calif r. r setti setting g gup up an informal but popular self self- service grocery in the middle of the street Eager customers hurried from all sides to fill their needs their pockets and in some cases the trunks of their cars It was a aboon aboon aboon boon for Cor budgets and ration books Then there was the strange case of the disappearing woman It happened happened happened hap hap- in Los Angeles as Mrs Janiel Janiel Jan- Jan iel idl gossiped of this and of that with three neighbors In the middle of a sentence whoosh sentence whoosh Mrs disappeared Firemen came cameon on the run extricated her from a forgotten excavation 12 feet deep Mrs side fence-side weight is pounds If men bite dogs to make news why shouldn't a horse smack an auto That's what two Norwich Kan horses figured one afternoon when they were scared silly by a girl on roller skates They ran and ran until they encountered a parked car Then they got their signals mixed Horse No 1 I went on one side of the car horse No 2 on the other That left only one place for Cor the wagon tongue to go right go-right right through the car Nobody was hurt Auto Picks Up Boy The driver of an auto in Chicago wondered why people were pointing pointing pointing point point- ing and yelling at him one day last August He stopped the car and I found of all things a bewildered year old boy Timothy boy Timothy by name name on on the front bumper The car had struck Timmy and carried him two full blocks Tim got a bump on the head a few bruises and a flattering amount of attention Ed Cloud and Earl Thomas of Knoxville Tenn didn't know for a minute whether they were coming cominS' or going the day that a train hit their truck The engine tossed the truck onto the pilot of another locomotive locomotive locomotive loco loco- motive going the other way A scratch on Clouds Cloud's head was the only casualty In Chicago Mrs Rita Hatfield ran to answer the phone stumbled over the dog fell through a topped glass-topped coffee table suffered bad cuts on her arms arms' and legs Doggedly answering answering answering an an- the phone Mrs Hatfield found the call was from an accident insurance company making a sur sur- vey Was she they wanted to know covered against accidents in her home She C. C C. C Hardy stepped out of his truck in Sidney Texas was struck by a passing car and tossed high into the air Just before his head struck the concrete pavement his pocket caught on the high truck door handle and held him suspended inthe in m inthe the air I I On the way home from the Bronx I zoo in New York Henry 13 13 sought to imitate the monkeys he had seen He lie leaped up an and down on n the subway seat scat scratching and grimacing On an especially high hiSh jump an electric fan nipped his scalp No more monkey business for I Henry In Iii Washington Court House Ohio hot words must have been exchanged exchanged exchanged ex ex- changed over the phone one day day- In any event Superintendent Fred Rost of the phone company reported that too much talking had overloaded eight switches and set the phone exchange exchange exchange ex ex- change on fire Louis Board Boardman n halted his automobile automobile automobile auto auto- I mobile in Cleveland to watch the I huge gas plant fire there last Octo Octo- ber He stepped out for a better view I and and fell Cell through an open manhole the cover of which had been blown off by the gas blast Clarence Brown Jr of St. St Louis knows just how a baseball fan feels I when he is really burned up Watching Watching Watching Watch Watch- ing a sandlot game this summer Clarence was struck by a line drive and promptly burst into flames The batter had scored a eye bulls on a pocketful of stick matches Both the blaze and the batter were soon put putout out Travelling Buzz Saws As Henry Butler ate breakfast in Jacksonville Fla a buzz saw ripped through the kitchen wall sliced the breakfast table neatly in two and whirled out the other side of the I v y S house It had broken loose from a saw mill nearby Not so spectacular but just as surprising surprising surprising sur sur- was the feat of another buzz saw that went A. A W W. O. O L L. L This one broke loose in Florence S. S C. C sailed through the air for a mile and ripped through the roof of a parked car whose owner had just alighted year Six-year-old Robert Julian of Chicago Chicago Chicago Chi Chi- cago was shooting a dart gun at a target on the wall The dart had a rubber suction cup on the end to hold when it struck a flat surface Often it hit and didn't cling so Robert fastened a needle in the suction cup so that the point would stick into the wall An elder brother Frank 19 entered entered entered en en- the room just as Robert shot The dart struck Frank in the chest He felt a slight pain but thought nothing of it at the time Later he collapsed and was rushed to the hos hos- pital pita Surgeons discovered after considerable considerable considerable con con- hunting around that there was a needle imbedded near Franks Frank's heart Little Robert had forgotten about that sharp point on the end of his dart but it was there all the same and it came near killing his brother As it was a skillful operation operation operation opera opera- j tion removed the needle and Frank I was as well as ever after a few days I f Top honors in the freak fall faU department department department de de- de- de for 1944 go to year four old Raymond Davis Jr of Chicago who fell three stories from a back i porch and suffered only a bruise on I the head A neighbors neighbor's clothes line caught him as he fell feU bounced him himI I gently a couple of times and then let him fall the few remaining feet to the ground And in Hollywood Strip Teaser Betty Rowland put so much heart into her work that she bumped one of her swivel-hips swivel against a wall walland walland walland and took off for the hospital suffering suffering suffer suffer- ing from partial paralysis |
