Show JI THE There is trouble in the home of the Elmer Ceiling trouble 0 Elmer is establishing ceilings Not that there haven't been ceilings ceilings ceilings ceil ceil- ceil- ceil ings in the Twitchell residence The kind of issue just now is a different ceiling The Washington kind The prevailing type I Elmer is trying to put a ceiling on Mrs Twitchell's hats for in- in in in- stance We Ve heard that crack about them being funny enough as is He wants the ceiling established at two hats per season a drop of about eight And he thinks there should be a price ceiling too somewhere around 0 0 0 Elmer is for a fur coat ceiling too but the crisis hasn't arisen this season because Mrs Twitchell got anew coat last winter She got it wholesale at above twice what it would have cost elsewhere N 0 0 S SAnd And he thinks there should be a ceiling on all the wife's wiles expendi expendi- tures I told her last night that tha 1 there must be a ceiling on bridge I losses said Elmer today Every time she goes to one of them Tuesday Tuesday Tuesday Tues Tues- day Ladies Bridge parties she loses money on a pre defense emergency level Maybe the best way to solve this would be to put a ceiling on her bids 0 He wants a ceiling on the wife's contributions to causes also I arrall am arr all for being charitable and fair he explained and Hand my heart is no mustard seed when it comes to reacting reacting reacting re re- re- re acting to to the worthy appeals of to today today today to- to day and there has gotta be some limit The old lady just subscribes subscribe to everything Last week she pu put me down for 10 to the American Fund to Save Icelanders From American Army Slang She aint ain got no judgment Ive I've imposed a ceiling Everything she subscribes above 4 a we week weCk is void S S S Me and the w wile wife e aint speaking just now confessed Mr Twitchell Yeah its it's more ceiling trouble Pin money ceiling I used to give her 10 a week but this is a time tune of crisis The future is uncertain Nobody can tell what may happen next in this world war So I told her the new ceiling on pin money would be What That did she say we asked What didn't she say exclaimed Elmer Did you explain inflation to her No uNo Why not I 1 dont don't even understand it myself myself myself my my- self concluded Elmer S S S R. R Roelofs Jr says he knows a aman aman aman man who is so rich he can afford to take the ladies for lor cocktails and dinner dinner dinner din din- ner in the ladies' ladies dining room at a aman's amans amans aman's amans aman's mans man's club S S S SJohn John Cudahy says that Hitler looked to him like a man with a malignant disease Hes He's n a viCtim nf n. n geographical indigestion hardening of the head and retarded mustache S S S What Mr Lewis fears is that he would lose face News News item We Ve can think of no face which could stand it better S S S THE MENACE The cops should paddle Henry Snipes He drives straddle a-straddle Highway stripes Merrill Chilcote S S S The Journal of the American M Med d- d ical Association reports that experiments experiments experiments ments at Harvard prove Drove that u suffer from cold a and d heat more than men because they do not dress as warmly This makes the opinion unanimous and presumably official n P 40 a ana ume Messer who conducted the experiments had a group of men me me sit in an air condi room in mens men's trousers and then change to women's lingerie Then they had women go through a similar test Nothing can convince us that the whole thing wasn't arranged arranged ar ar- ar- ar ranged by a couple of Yale men S S S Washington in its new tax proposals proposals pro pro- may subscribe to the notion that it is is impossible to get blood from a stone But it thinks the idea is good S S S THE SEASONS Winter is an old dame In a white lace cap Spring is a maid with folded hands And flowers in her lap C is a golden queen Wearing a jeweled crown And autumn is a gypsy In a russet gown I I Joan Joan Maher S S S Simile by R. R Roelofs Jr AS As patient as a man waiting while his wife buys a SECOND HAT 0 |