| Show I Talk Valk of the Town by Karl Keller Something Old Fashioned I suppose its it's fairly difficult for the tIU old fellers of our day to keep up with the current trend in things Some cant can't seem to remember whether John L L. L Sullivan Sullivan Sullivan Sul Sul- livan or Rocky Marciano 1 last las won the heavyweight boxing title or whether its it's Nora Bays Baysor or Marilyn Monroe that should be the object for much of their then affection One thing that seems fairly difficult to keep up on these days is the trend in dingy cars I suppose they think something something something some some- thing is drastically wrong when they start investigating today's flashy automobiles They undoubtedly miss the running boards where once went the acetylene tank the tool chest and the spare tire and where the kids used to ride holding onto the top brace Inspection of modern n cars undoubtedly leads them to wonder where the opening to the gasoline tank is and if i that's it on the thc back fender how on earth anyone would ever get a ruler in it to measure e the gas If H they took a glance at the front of the hood they would woul d shake with horror at not finding finding find find- ing jug the motor meter where i it t ought to be and the old magneto magneto magneto mag mag- neto switch where it used t to tobe tobe be dancing loosely in the dash dash- board And I suppose they would woul d wonder what's become of th the e horn with horses still running running running run run- ning around on the roads it ita its it's s a necessary item But when they are told the horn is on the steering wheel they'll wonder wonder wonder won won- der what's become of the spark sparkplug sparkplug sparkplug plug and gas levers along with the bar to open the windshield If they notice the fine upholstering upholstering upholstering jobs of today they will wil probably mention as they tug at the rug that it would be impossible to get the f l 1 o 0 o a r boards up if you had to put water in the batteries I The very mention of how much today's cars cost might I send the old fellers reeling Am And they'd think that a car costing that much would have a gold- gold plated crank to crank it with But it wont won't Cars vs Wars Vars The automobile has killed al almost almost al- al almost most as many Americans as have all wars News Item From Redcoat muskets to Russ made tanks Whose death-dealing death none wil wiil disparage The toll of war is but little S ahead Of the toll of the horseless carriage And given a year or two of peace While the enemy's bombs are massing The auto will rapidly pull alongside And raucously honk while passing Armoure |
