Show al V an bic 0 0 bib 0 about summer influenza CANTA ANTA MONICA CALIF binl S 17 1 7 this favored land we are now starting to celebrate the custom 1 ary seasonal rite of having OUT summer influenza summer influenza is d distinguished from winter influenza by the facil that tha t the former does not set in until september thereby providing intervals for spring and fall to slip in between the symptoms remain practically the same the eyes water copiously but the nose runs second the head stops up thoroughly thus providing proof of irv S cobb the fallacy of the old adage all sinus fail in dry weather the patient barks like a trained seal but the diff difference arence here is that the seal stops barking if you toss him a hunk of raw fish one could go on at length but it s difficult to continue a writing job ob when you re using a nasal in 1 balent to punctuate with and have havo a taste in your mouth like moth balls smothered in creosote dress ing the art of cussing Y OLD chum burgess johnson johnsoni M once an editor but now a col coli i lege professor tells a credulous bunch of advertising men that maraj mark twain was the champion all aimel time all american cusser could cuss five solid minutes without repeating himself pardon me burgess but mark twain never did any such things once I 1 heard him at his out cussing est best denouncing a publisher who had offended him he sword for five minutes all right but lover and over again he used the same few familiar oaths which the english speaking race always have used he didn dian t introduce a new or an original one I 1 studied the art of cussing bussing cus sing both by note and by ear under such gifted masters of profanity as southern steamboat mates new york newspaper men london cab drivers western mule whackers and north woods timber choppers with my hand on my heart I 1 solemnly affirm that not one of these alleged experts ever employed any save the dependable age seasoned standbys stand bys to wit seven adjectives two strong nouns one ultra strong noun and one compound phrase the commonest of all S romance for king zog COR OR about the fifth time comes a plaintive plea from albania one of those remote little border countries of eastern europe where every now and then peace threatens to break out they have a king over there at least they had a king at the time of going to press with this dispatch his name is king zog this is neither a typographical error nor a vaudeville gag the name positively is zog and radio comedians may make the most of it for many months he has been paging the world for a wife the qualifications call for the lady to have 5 his majesty would also like for her to turn but the main requirement is that 5 bank roll california coastline coastline WHILE wine HILE it s quite a roomy coast it line california has at present only one coastline this is a source of mortification to patriotic native sons florida having two such one on either side besides a dampish area in the middle known as the ther everglades still in a way california s silvery strand continues to excel within easy speeding distance we have at least one beach resort where when palm springs folds up on account of the heat many of our artistic artisti cr colony go to relax so wholeheartedly do some go in for this that oft k en you may stand off a quarter of a mile and hear them relaxing occasionally a relaxation relaxes so completely that it takes weeks for him to get over it his friends leave him at the seaside only to gather at the bedside the changing world TT WAS susan B anthony who IT dedicated her life to the cause of emancipation for her sex but it was her grandniece who lately attained the headlines by suggesting that with the addition of a buckle here and a ribbon there a nigh nightie tier would make a suitable evening gown for almost any occasion thus do we see how from one generation on to another is handed down the flame of genius and ice to womankind but although the inspired suggestion is already weeks old chete still are no signs that it is finding advocates among the queen bees of the cultural hive maybe the reason is that a belle of the 1191 hollywood lywood artistic group would feel so ostentatiously overdressed if ale wore a full fashioned nightie to a social function i A IRVIN S Q service j i t |