Show 46 THOUGHTS reprinted by special permission from the UTAH FARMER thia this farm life sure Is the bunk in fact its it s just one long sob right after another henry ford Is to blame or ninety per cent ot of the browin pains bein experienced by agriculture secy hyde and pres sam thompson to the contrary notwithstanding that Is 19 henry and his first edition ot the model T before farmers got to bradin their wheat and squash tor for henry henrys s inal thunder storms they had enough and to spare taxes paid and all but now see whit a sorry plight we re in mortgage man waiting just around the corner only 2 payments made on the last tire and the gas tank nearly empty all this ana anci facin a whole week afore another cream check Is due let me explain further why I 1 m alamin henry when the first vest pocket edition of 0 henry a go cart reached the kingdom of agriculture there were a few adventurous farmers with a lit tie wad tucked away under the south west corner of the parlor rug who took a fancy to the new toy th the e first rides were anything but joy rides what with the old wagon road along the cinal bank and ev ry team on the road chinkin a th machine had gone on a rampage and ma settin on the edge pt pf the back seat ready to fly on the slightest pretence but each adaven ture out in the new contraption took these farmers farther and farther from home and therein proved their ruination these audacious farmers in their primitive gas carts got farther from home than they had ever been before and then one time the tle darned ol 01 rat tie tle trap broke down and there was bothin else to do but go to the near est house to borrow some balin wire and naturally they got to cizin up th place and learned that grass grew around the bouse house and the men folks and family had time to sit on it once in a while and rest when they couldn coulden t fix up the old tin roller with the balan wire they had to stay all night and saw electric lights and got a glimpse of t t real enamel bath tub also they learned that there was so soni ethin methin else to eat besides ba con and all this started these farmers to chinkin th inkin and a chinkin farmer Is a dissatisfied far mer we had a good thing of it before we got to roamie around all over god a green footit footstool ool in henry ford a atomizers so long as we could look across our field and see the crops still browin and the cows in the pasture there wasn gasn t anything to worry about with some spuds in the cellar and a diab 0 bacon on the wall and some biskit dust in the bin we had all the essentials to sustain life and we haan t dreamed about ily in yet really livin I 1 mean then monkey ward co cc sent out their farmer farmers a bible and sears send back co cc giot got out a de lux volume nice furniture what you can sit down in and sink clear out of sight to your arm pita pits in softer n a and a bath tub you could idem dern near swim in and a radio out fit tit you didn dian to wind up and what do anything from preach you into heaven to tell you what kind 0 tooth paste to use all this and and we more on instalments installments pay the postage I 1 lookin at the picture of these things has got us farmers so pessimistic and down hearted that they think the demo brats are in office it aint th lack of things what makes hard times its of more you faint get got farmers are alre doln doin more than they ever did before in their whole lives livies they ve learned to read and so they want to know more about the things they read about they ve learned to listen on the radio and that tells lein about a lot 0 things they never knew existed other men improved on heury ford fords s idea of movin humanity from one place to another and so big tine fine cars got to ram gamblin blIn out past the old farmsteads and farmers got to wonderlin won derin where so 80 many tolka folks came from and where they were goin to and all in all he got all mixed up he had been taught and trained to consider life just one hard bard day after another un til tit there w was as only two days out of the year to celebrate the one was when the new baby came and the other was tax settlement day and so the farmer got to things he got the dimmes gim me this an gamme thail he wanta wants his hours cut to 12 hours a day with three hours oft off on sunday he wants his ids tax burden reduced so 80 he kin buy a new automobile he wants a balanced ration tor for the family as well ia is tor for the cow he wanta wants the law of 0 supply and da de mand repealed so he can grow cheap crops and sell em at a big profit he wants bath tubs without han ban dies on an em he wanta wants amos and andy without tooth paste he wants more leisure urns time in which to amuse himself with mall mail order catalogs he wants a modern kathchen kith chen tor for th wife including Inc ludin all th modern contraptions such as water and can opener he H wants all these false profits be a been a fallo electrocuted so you see mr editor the modern farmer la is a man of the world full of whims and fancies full 0 leaks and bloode knowledge and intelligence he aint no mora a th old mosa moss back pictured in the funnies fannies lie Hes a learned to use a gilletto he has since they guve em away tree free with a box to shaving powder and once or a week his face Is just as smooth as a tater grater ind and Us its authentically reported by enterprising statisticians hired autta the taxes he paid that since amos and andy took the air 3 2 ped cent of the farmers of the na tion Is now breshin their teeth al most ev ry night oh I 1 in telling aou ou that henry ford started so some methin thlu when he hammered out the first public nuisance on that trusty ol 01 anvil 0 his he got th farmers tar mera to roun where they could see things and it sure has ruin ed em I 1 don t think the can ever git ep em back where they was afore what with all this th Is stuff in ith th air about farm relief and sich that stuff can just as well be dump ed into the waste basket afore it its s printed for the farmer farmers s got th gimples 9 gamme this an gamme THAT an the more he gits th more he wants ad entin lincoln freed the black man wash ington freed the colon colonies fes hoover treed freed the workingman but it took henry to tree free the farmer since farmers got to riding out on air they ve got some high and lofty notions well so long it s nearly mid night and the wife says I 1 d better come down to eath earth and go up to bed yrs till henry gives fords away as samples THE clodhopper in utah farmer |