Show X 0 ORD ao RATHER OILY the train stopped at the little georgia town and the tourist sauntered out to tho the observation platform rather likely you have there uncle remarked the traveler good named george washington no go bah laughed the colored man anthe on the baggage truck dat chiles name am petro petro why a queer sound ing name for a pl Icka nInny might seem a little queen to you sah oah but massa Rocky fellar was down heah some time ago en gib me a qua tah tab foh fob his grip ah named de in his honah sah but rockefellers Rocke fellers first namo name Is john yeas sah but yo see dis chiles full name am petroleum en wo we calls him petro foh fob missed one william said mrs beckem sternly did you ever stop to think that some one might steal me when you are away well responded the poor hen pecked husbard hus baud with a faraway far away look 1 iwas I was a little alarmed when a horse thief was prowling through these parts last week mrs beckem stiffened up haughtily A horse thief eh ch yes I 1 heard that bo ho carried off two or three nags from this section n and then beckem made a beeline for or the car HIs just deserts that seems to be a hot pot over there th ere said a recent arrival in hades indicating a cauldron cauldren caul dron which was throwing out terrific heat waves you bet your life a hot pot hotl said an imp who spoke slang flud otly ly in fact one of the hottest pots in hades may I 1 ask who is the occupant you may the occupant Is an editor anu made a practice all his life of clipping stuff from other pers pera and publishing it in his own pa per without credit THE AUDIENCE KNEW liz I ils his acting as the hero was waa so realistic that the audience in when the mob tried to hang him in the second act the leading lady yes Hani fatter yes they said it was waa too good for him dead slow along the polar contest pokes and miller duller gets producing nothing new in joked or epithets LAY OF THE EGG CLUS CLUB Cac cackle klot cackler cackle I 1 cackle lf 1 cried the lion hen 1 I have laid a handsome egg and to state 1 humbly beg faithful to my job I 1 work and I 1 do not even shirk now and then cackled cackle Cac klel klet cried the hen Cac cackle klel cackle cackle I 1 cried tho the man 1 or I have laid a pretty plot As for eggs ill cat them not till a dozen in expense comes to only thirty cents my plan cackle cackle Cac cackle klel I 1 cried the man Cac cackle klel cackle Cac cackle klel cried the trust 1 I will lay rebellions rebel llona ghost what avails a fasting host I 1 have storage houses cold that a lot of eggs will hold ere they bust cackle cackle Cac cackle klel I 1 cried the trust mclaughlin ln wilson in new york sun CRUEL mr watson ah lobella lobelia I 1 love you my heart in IB on fire lobella lobelia then ill put it out I 1 keep this bottle handy bandy for just such emergence emergencies ies merely a starter with young folks the mistletoe plays havoc car can you doubt it for kissing started by its aid soon gets along without it the cost of tho the service what do you pay your chef I 1 asked the great trust magnate whose steamers plow every sea whose railroads span every state whose tenements pay him 36 35 per cent in every city five thousand dollars he said briefly but one of the yellow journals I 1 persisted states that your chel chef costs you twenty five thousand well I 1 fear the statement Is not incorrect he sighed though I 1 pay the chef the amount I 1 named he costs me fully twenty five thousand for I 1 pay a salary of twenty thousand to my physician not incompatible 1 I wonder that the reformers have not attacked the tables in arithmetic which are taught the children in schools why should they attack such things as those on the ground of morality choso tables make drains and scruples go together color sorrows the matter with that amateur farmer his peaches have the yellows yes yep so lies hes rot got the blues |