Show tox ali r HE BOUGHT BOOKS A man who had never had the time or opportunity to get much book learning loar n I 1 ilg suddenly became wealthy he gave up work built himself a fine house and settled down to enjoy life recollecting his early and unanswered longing for foi books lie he went to a shop to order some the voter tells the story 1 I want a lot of books he said to the clerk what kind of books was the reply why books said the prospective purchaser good books you know reading books the books came and were installed in the ahe library soon after an old friend slightly ano more e learned than the rich man came to call here hugh bugh said the host ig ib my library here is where I 1 intend to sit down with my books and read hugh took down a book looked at it and put but it back took down another looked at it and and put it back and repeated po the process several times w then lie he asked john where did you get these books oh I 1 ought bought them just bought them the matter arent they good books I 1 ha ent read them yet good books was the reply but all the same john aa a lb near as I 1 can figure out you have halve bought COO copies of the fifth reader its a good book but theres too ciany aia of it here far too many STOOD BY HIS WORD 00 customer the hair grower which you sold me lately is a swindle you guaranteed that it would help me after I 1 had tried all other remedies barber well have you tried all the others had no kick coming 1 I suppose said the lady suffragist that you are one of those men who find fault with the cooking at home ionic you are entitled to another suppose madam answered mr meeker ton calmly you see my wife is an active member of your bunch and most of the cooking done at our house is the work of yours truly injured innocence Innocenc 6 did you see where george twitty went I 1 to law to make emma flirty give him bacr back his diamond engagement ring when she jilted him yes that mean emma never accepts any man who good taste in jewelry and hes the first one in her experience to be so stingy as to want his ring back at the wedding they say old binks sold his dough daugh ter mistake stake imas I 1 was at the wedding and saw him myself give het her away PARLOUS TIMES k r fortunes or tunes upstart boasts ills his riches smokes a whopping big cigar knocks poor people into ditches with his speedy auto car will lie ho ever have to suffer for his supercilious ways this purse proud and bloated duffer who drinks champagne all his days maybe so BO yet theres no telling truly virtues looking sick sinful arts are so compelling and the grafters drafters gr are so thick 1 AFFECTED HIM differently MEL earlie pa loing doing down in the cellar patching up tha th icebox his ma ala no dear hes putting new wire gauze on the screen doors door S earlie aflfe how do you know his ma ala by the ian language guage he is using g dear 4 something besides gas how did you come here my poor man asked the sympathetic visitor well mum in de first place I 1 went into a dental parlor and had a tooth pulled explained no 2323 gracious and did you take anything before you had it extracted yes mum I 1 took a set of gold teeth en a case of tools en walked out dat how I 1 landed here muni mum 11 smoketown Smoke town reports chicago and pittsburg were engaged in repa repartee t rabe I 1 im in the big noise laughed chicago well you may be the big noise retorted pittsburg but im the big smoke USELESS I 1 recal 0 0 doorkeeper at brinl baini play dont you want to come back victim no doorkeeper well take this plass pass check anyway hand it some one outside victim my aly dear fellow I 1 an enemy in the world |