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Show Uncle lyfe otory & rvJ l t?j '--a.,cht iii FOIBLES OF ANIMALS T)ETERSIIAV has an extreme! JL gentle driving horse," said tin veterinary surgeon. "He has mad the animal a member of his famllj for several years, and it was so gentle anybody could drive It. The other daj Petershaw mads up bis mind h would sell Dobbin, Dob-bin, as he couldn'l afford to buj breakfast food fot him any longer. A man who wanted want-ed a horse dropped around, and Peter, shaw hitched Dobbin up, and . that fool horse just naturally ran away and the two men are go-ing go-ing around on crutches. It's hard to understand such a thing, for there never was a gentler horse." "There are several explanations," remarked the village partiarch. "It is possible, even probable, that the horse understands everything Petershaw Peter-shaw says, and when it heard him talking about selling, tbe noble animal put up a job to spoil the deal. Per haps Dobbin has a strongly developed sense of humor, and thought each an escapade would be highly amusing, and we must admit that it was. I cannot can-not imagine anything more humorous than to hitch up a perfectly gentla horse, and then have it act lika a funnel-shaped cloud. "There is no doubt that animals have a sense of humor. Unless we admit ad-mit that, it is impossible to explain many things they do. I think the mule is a great jester. When a mule looks most innocent, he is most dangerous. You can tell when a horse is going to hand you a few sample heels as a testimonial of its esteem ; it lays back Its ears and switches Its tail, and looks as vindictive as a rattlesnake. A reasonably active man can get out of the way when he sees a horse un-llmbering un-llmbering its heavy artillery. But it' different with a mule. This highly Bagacious animal will stand munching munch-ing its fodder, every motion and ever glance expressing peace on earth, good will toward men. The innocent by--( Btander is saying to himself tiat ha' never did see such an amiable expression ex-pression on an animal's face, and just! then the gentle critter hands him a holiday assortment of feet, and whon lie recovers consciousness he can't fnidi words that properly express his seuti-' ttients. "The cow is another humoiist. I1 have milked cows more or less all n.y days, and they all were addicted to harmless mirth. The cow I have now thoroughly enjoys batting me over the head with her tail'. Of course there is some excuse in the summer for a cow that keeps her tail going ; ' but there isn't any sense in such exercise in the winter, when the flies are dead. At this season my cow never brandishes her tail except at milking time. Then she keeps It going as though the flies were around her in clouds, and she has become so expert with her old tail that she pasted mo on the left ear about ten times a minute, min-ute, and then I had an eartnuff made, and wore it whenever I milked. So she hits me on the nose every time, and it's simply wonderful how accurate accur-ate ber aim is. "I had a cow once that I milked for four years and during that time she never lifted a foot or acted ornery in any way. I considered her the safest saf-est cow I ever saw. One evening thera were some visitors from the city at our house, and they went to the barn, lot with me to see me milk the cow. There were two or three ladles In the party, and as I milked I explained to, them that the animal was a marvel when it came to docility. I Bald I didn't believe she would kick If 4 charge of powder went off under her. Of course the cow heard every word I suld, and she simply couldn't resist the temptation to make me look Ilka thirty cents, so, Just when I was most enthusiastic in her praise, she landed a left hook on my chin and put ma down for the count. Those city folks said that if she was a gentle cow they'd give fifty cents to see an unruly one, and I suppose they're talking about the event yet." |