| Show My Ten Days in a University and How They Blew Blew- Im I'm Not Benchley But Im I'm Awake By y FRANK ALLEN Ten days in a university is long enough for the average neophyte I to find himself a wife but it took me that long to get on a mere tete a tete status with the registrars registrar's registrars registrar's registrars registrar's regis regis- secretary This doesn't necessarily necessarily necessarily mean that Im I'm slovenly upstairs upstairs upstairs up up- stairs a strictly uptown Yankee I Doodle colloquialism used to describe describe describe de de- de- de scribe one who is mentally behind the eight ball in fact the whole thing is attributable to the fact that my transcript was a little bit late From someplace ee the registrars registrar's registrars registrar's registrars registrar's regis regis- office has picked up the idea that the only reasons a persons person's transcript can be late are either because because because be be- cause he has spent his summer under a table or because his immediate immediate immediate imme imme- diate ancestry contains more maniac maniac maniac ma ma- depressives than an Italian patriot has offspring They were in fact so suspicious that they made me gargle before I could talk to the re registrar and then I had to todo todo todo do it by telephone The registrar was very sweet about everything and she told me that if Id I'd come back the next day I with references from three clergymen clergy clergy- clergy I men and my family medico shed she'd see if she could get et me a permit to register Three days later having finally located three sober ministers ministers ministers min min- I got the permit and a book of registration cards that looked like an unexpurgated edition of ol Gone With the Wind Vind and read like Grapes of Wrath Then 1 started standing in lines By the ena cna of the first week I knew so much about lines that I was offered a fellowship fellowship fellowship fel fel- in the department of dress desi design n but I was so near the beginning beginning be he- ginning of the line that I turned it down It was therefore a terrible blow to find that I had been standing standing standing stand stand- ing in the wrong line and by the end of that day lay J I was so uninitiated in the ways of the U leU that I thou thought ht the Humbug was put out by the University i society On the tenth day I got everything everything everything every every- thing straightened out and I had hac everybody's signature on my cards except the dean of my schools school's and Ann Sheridan's and guess I whose I wont won't miss I couldn't get the deans dean's because he said it was too bookkeeping am amId and Id I'd better transfer to another school The registrar wasn't very happy to see me again but she got me transferred to another school She says she thinks Ill I'll like it better than my last school because all the classrooms are arc done in blue padding padding padding pad pad- ding and all you have to do to register register register reg reg- ister is take the army beta test |
