Show i 1 Extenuation I I DI Dl e ever r t tell you about Long Lone A Archibald Archibald Archi Archi- hl- hl bald Allison McGregor Inquired the grayest reporter 01 Judge Judg Months Six the called him H He ae was vas a It stern old oM Scotchman for tor you you you- on the bench bench But say But out But out I-out ont the boys he set Bet em a s pace I l I Still sun In court well well they they used to say I that when he got bored listening to a ease case hed he'd Just turn to the clerk derk and mumble Six Sir months and that ended that case Anyhow I saw him do a a. thing once I 1 II I was hanging around his courtroom one morning picking up space when an to ancient ag stood up for tor sentence a drunk and disorderly The Judge looked fagged lagged Therod There'd been a n political political cal ratification meeting night before Be He automatically put the routine quess quest ques- ques t s lion as to whether the thew prisoner had Anything to offer in extenuation Tho The Tho old tipped him a wink out of ot one red eye I leered ered around at us ns reporters to make sure we Wc were on and yanked the throttle wide ille open Well Yell jed e he says theys amany amany amany a- a many a good ten u fer a capital capital cap enI ital Stal II U of or a good time lil like e I had last nIght light but I aint lucky enough to be bee carrying them around In my Jeans Theres There's the tile swell swe-ll clubhouse That's a mighty big ten u ten u tion a-tion- on- on j Talk about your our shocks A steen thousand voltage to the nth power short circuited around that news table table ta ta- ta ble In tho the millionth part of a 8 second and paralyzed every good reportorIal right arm clean dean down don to the sure sure- nough Dough diamond splinter on the ex ex- I tip Up of the reportorial p pen I Each Ench of us 01 Judge Six Six- Months from beneath coyly drooping eyelashes But nut the judge never turned a hair looked a bit bleaker perhaps but gR game e Scotch game tal Though on se second ond thoughts I wouldn't say a noncommittal was exactly exactly ex ex- adly th the word But it But it aint fer tel me we the old vac 81 chirped on nope Hope Not fer tel tile the likes of Jt me Nothing for lor him to worry about- about tee ue He Be hadn't any Job to lose He He was going to be he sent up anyway Judge baiting was a perfectly safe sate pastime and he went to It Question was how bow lon long Ions would Old Six Months play up Then goes on Old Blear eye a champagne Jogs Jog's supposed to be the worst ever ever but but it dont don't lead to the lockup not usually And And theres there's theres the 10 10 taxi Its It's expensive but It comes cheaper In the long Ions run than the police poUce wagon You And jest And jest fer ter another little ol of ten u theres there's the cop that knows his star will set flet fer ter good If It he be lands his bis charge at atthe atthe atthe the police poUce station when hes he's due ue at a abIg abig abig big Queen Anne bungalow on the heights Now I aint got all them ten u ten u an and andou you ou have But But ut- you could see he aorta sorta admired 01 Six Months grit grit grit- Tm rm a good sport sames same's you rOUe I aint kickin ner sayin you dont don't de deserve o to lit aft off You do rd Pd git off oft myself If It ItI I had bad half hall yer pull The pots pot's yours yourn I dont don't buck no pair of ot deuces agin a royal flush They're all yourn all yourn-all all them ten u I aint got sot nary an a n ten In my flU exten aint eaten aint got even e britches pocket to pay my fine Bo Bolts Bolt's So- So Its It's do time fer ier yours truly I aint an I dont don't hold It agn yuh yub Db You had a rip time on champagne and I 1 wa want t so fur tur behind behind be be- ibind hind bind on bug juice Say SayI I 1 I bet your heads head's mine this mornin 1 But But you But you can afford an assortment as ns assortment of hats bats So So-no So no hard bard When I git out jU 11 be glad to take another on yuh By that time you'll be off ort yer milk diet yer- yer self The old paused tentatively McGregor McGregor Mc Mc- McGregor Gregor politely gave gaye him time to get rid of ot anything else he might happen to have hae on his bis chest Well Pell the old scout piped up again with th a sort of satisfied grunt runt git a 8 wove move on j dge Im I'm In a hurry to begin begin be be- gin out that six sir months Ive I've got a n date on fer tel a Do next Christmas Christinas Ume time you could make It so as IlS to us polite j polite as a basket of ot chips Well say I 1 There was Wile a big laugh coming But Dut not just then Not Not just just then Old Six-Months Six had a political drag that bridged the bay and roped In the countryside worsen an electric Interurban street railway consolida tion We reporters weren't tired oi ot of oto o our our r Jobs So we wo sat tight didn't work our sour faces any sharpened lead pencils and cleaned our fountain pens and and waited for something to drop Long Archibald sat serene and interested In in- till he be was quite sure the I vas TaS had said out his say Then hei ho he i mentioned ID casually to the tho clerk Ten dollars or or or- orten ten days lays in the city prison i and motioned the cop to retain th the prisoner i We were just jaet getting our breath back back when the judge instructed th the 1 clerk in the same casual tone to call call caU- Archibald Allison McGregor I The clerk bawled out Archibald Allis Allis- und and then it struck in H HI He I realized O he was dreaming talking 1 in inI I 1 his bis sleep lIe Ho blushed until his f face tace ac J swelled out like a squirrels squirrel's In acorn acor time BIB Hie Jaw dropped bl hall f A 1 I I and then Jumped up again His eyes walled waked out until out on one pointed nor east and the other wt teat by south BOUth Call Archibald Allison McGregor d regor his bIs honor repented repeated with ominous pa pa- tience But but Dut but your our honor you honor I you Call Archibald Allison Mo Me- Gregor r Gregor-r-r r-r r The clerks clerk's eyes eye came back to place with a snap All right I He lie was WItS game to call the old mans man's bluff job bluff Job or no Job Let the tho tail tall go with tho the hide Archibald Allison McGregor ha ho howled holed Here Dere says Long Archibald standIng standing stand stand- Ing upI upI upI up I understand says 1818 Judge McGregor McGreg McGreg- or addressing himself Prisoner McGregor McGregor Mc Me- Gregor Glegor that you Archibald Allison McGregor were found drunk and disorderly dIsorderly disorderly dis dIs- orderly on Market street b chune twelve welve and one o'clock n morning re Ar-re you guilty or nawt nam guilty Guilty says Prisoner McGregor respectfully addressing himself the see Judge see Have you rou any extenuation e t to offer otter for your conduct or anny reason to ur-rge ur why sentence should nawt be pronounced upon you Inquired Prisoner Prisoner Prisoner Pris Pris- oner McGregor or None says Prisoner McGregor This being an aggravated ag case and to 0 my knowledge nawt nat the first offense offense of of- of ot tho prisoner says the Judge judie Z 1 I set the fine tine at 50 00 In case of ot Its It's nawt paid he hesitated ted then then then- from sheer force torce of ot habit I guess guess- six months In n the tho city prison he says ays Then ho he stalked over to the desk and paid his hla fine like a little man Well VeIl sa say there say there there was was one one man dare dared to laugh why Laugh Laugh why that eyed blear vagabond made those dingy old plastered crack walls shake their very very sl sides cs alo along g with him Mm See here he be finally got free tree enough nough from the garroting of the cop copo to o sputter Youre Jest a little bit bitof ot of f all aU right Youre You're the stuff staff That's That'll what I call I That's worth 10 19 ot of f any mans man's good money I 1 He fumbled under the ragged lining ot of f his old l coat cuffs cutts and brought to toIght light Ight a R tattered greenback which had escaped the searcher Heres to the next one 1 I he says MrS waving the long green at the bunch of us s. s Heres Deres to the next one may I-may may It Ite be e champagne and a taxi all around 1 l lAnd And he planked down m his little old 10 like Ike a millionaire Clear the court 1 bellowed Long Archibald We cleared 1 |